5 days feeling good, 3 days feeling bad

[VivaldiBR]

After a long time, I managed to have about 5 consecutive days of peace and I was feeling happy. But since Wednesday night, melancholy, anxiety and emptiness hit me again.

Recovery is a very difficult path.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

I think that's a good ratio! Do you keep a diary of good/bad days within a week?

 

[VivaldiBR]

Yes, something similar. I write about emotions, feelings, teachings about my readings of self-knowlegded.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

At my best I have 3 good days a week once in 6 weeks. I think you're doing well!

 

[VivaldiBR]

unfortunately it is not very good because before those 5 days, I was 2 months without a single day of peace.

Thanks a lot!

 

[degeneratewaste]

the fact that you had more bad days than good is commendable. but yes, I know how much of a blow it is after a good period to return to the pain, it almost feels worse after the temporary alleviation. just try to be grateful for those good days. it's great that you have even a small will to recover.

 

[MichaelNomad123]

Ships at sea, brother. Ships at sea.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

Ships at sea, brother. Ships at sea.

What does it mean?

 

[MichaelNomad123]

What does it mean?

Storms and smooth sailing. Ebb and flow

 

[VivaldiBR]

the fact that you had more bad days than good is commendable. but yes, I know how much of a blow it is after a good period to return to the pain, it almost feels worse after the temporary alleviation. just try to be grateful for those good days. it's great that you have even a small will to recover.

Thank you for these words. I guess you are right.

 

[DocNo]

the fact that you had more bad days than good is commendable. but yes, I know how much of a blow it is after a good period to return to the pain, it almost feels worse after the temporary alleviation. just try to be grateful for those good days. it's great that you have even a small will to recover.

what hits me the hardest on the beginning of a bad period you can remember the good time, but it fades away and for me it is sometimes, that i can't decipher my own thoughts from the good times, like my IQ has instantly dropped by 10 points.

 

[VivaldiBR]

I remember. I had glimpses of acceptance, that life can have a new meaning, that I am fine and that things can work out again. But it only lasted 5 days. I'm already back with feelings of melancholy, low self-esteem, guilt, emptiness and hopelessness. And CTB idealization all over again.

 

[ilovenightmares]

Ships at sea, brother. Ships at sea.

This. You're not alone in feeling this way, if it's any consolation.

 

[franklynlb]

Recovery is hard, i'm sorry you are having some shitty days, only thing i can say is try to surround yourself with things you like, be nice to yourself, good days will come again!