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.twilight.girl.

.twilight.girl.

Living off of miracles.
Aug 19, 2023
35
My boyfriend is a singer/song writer and my dumb bipolar brain won't let this go. I know it's for art, but hearing him have 4-5 songs about other girls is driving me up the wall.
mostly ex girlfriends and one that is made up.
I know this is unreasonable, I know it's not because he wants those people. But my mind keeps trying to convince me otherwise. I am struggling to maintain being a supporting partner and just pushing through or not wanting to participate at all.
Makes me feel awful. I no longer want my mental and abandonment issues to drive my life anymore, I literally can't enjoy anything and it takes away others happiness cause I am such a drag. I wish I was able to hide my mental illness better, like some other people can, you know? Like the ones where everyone is like "omg, we never knew". Makes me think I am not doing this right? Can I be doing mental illness wrong? Am i supposed to be vocal? I am not trying to get attention, i always worry what people think about me. I just wish I wasn't so obviously unwell. I have been in therapy since I was 4, (i am 25 now) I've done countless medications, but I feel like a different person every time i see my therapist so i can't really get to the root of the problem. I am constantly confused.

I managed to find the SN site. Although I struggle with payment due to my own financial stability. Will revisit at a later time.
 
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deadstillwalking

deadstillwalking

floating away from everyone
Apr 23, 2024
38
Hey!! I think it's completely understandable not to feel alright when someone makes songs about someone beside you.. I think that's natural and many other people would feel somewhat uncomfortable as well.
 
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Whale_bones

Whale_bones

A gift to summon the spring
Feb 11, 2020
439
It's completely understandable that hearing those songs would make you feel bad. Lots of people feel upset if their partner just talks a lot about an ex, and a song is something that's expressing a lot of emotion and is much more visceral.

I know that the inspiration for a new piece of art can hit randomly, but you can let him know that it's hurtful/upsetting to hear songs about other girls, though you still support him as an artist and you're not judging his creative process. I bet if you had a hobby that was repeatedly expressing emotion about 4 of your exes, he would also feel bad being around that!

So if you let him know how this makes you feel, hopefully he will choose to avoid singing/playing those songs in front of you or bringing them up. It's an easy thing to do and definitely worth it to respect his partner (you).
 
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.twilight.girl.

.twilight.girl.

Living off of miracles.
Aug 19, 2023
35
thank y'all for the replies. i'm glad i wasn't alone in my thinking.
 
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