Venting antidepressants keep fucking failing me

[endofeverything]

i know this isn't the place to get medical advice, and i'm really not trying to, but i just need to rant about this

one month after starting, i've decided to quit the antidepressant i'm taking. again...... i've already tried three different types before, and none of them had any of the promised positive effects for me. all i ever get are side effects, and they are BAD. the supposed positive effects were either completely absent, or disproportionately weak compared to the downsides.

the last two weeks have been some of the worst in my life. i was almost constantly thinking about ending it, i completely stopped enjoying the things i usually do, and everything was a struggle. and while there are other contributing factors, it just doesn't make sense that i would feel this agitated, hopeless and apathetic towards everything i used to love THIS far into taking the medication. why does it never work out? it's not like i subconsciously want them to fail, on the contrary: i put so much hope and expectation into things getting easier, and the lack of anything changing just makes me crash even harder.

i keep hearing and reading from people who were greatly helped by these types of medication and i'm left wondering - why not me? what's wrong about my body that makes all these meds have almost only adverse effects? i feel hopeless at this point. i don't even know if i should bother going back to my neurologist and gettting a 5th type of medication. it'll just be more of the same.


for the record: sertraline, paroxetine, trazodone, bupropion

 

[slinkey10]

Was going to ask what but you have listed.

-Everyones physiology is different. (fact)
Google it - https://aacdrpubs.faculty.ucdavis.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/211/2015/03/lin012.pdf
loads of other research around sleeping pills (me included) that fit into some group of ppl that they just dont work on.

sertraline & the other ssris u listed - is cheap crap. Back in the day it was prozac but more expensive but ultimatley just numbs/blunts your emotions.
bupropion = NDRI ... dopamine+... eye roll

Also the ssri myth has been debunked

Analysis: Depression is probably not caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain – new study

Writing in The Conversation, Professor Joanna Moncrieff and Dr Mark Horowitz (both UCL Psychiatry) report on their new research showing no clear evidence that serotonin levels or serotonin activity are responsible for depression.

www.ucl.ac.uk

obvs psychitary = ssris's & the dumb DSM is there bread & butter so this for balance

Has the Serotonin Hypothesis Been Debunked?

A recent review paper claims it debunks the serotonin hypothesis for depression. But it was never a legitimate hypothesis, so there is nothing to debunk.

www.psychologytoday.com

"one month after starting, i've decided to quit the antidepressant i'm taking. again" - :)

 

[endofeverything]

sertraline & the other ssris u listed - is cheap crap.

i know, all i got was cheap tier low efficacy meds that you get when your doctor doesn't think it's that serious. but they seem to work for other people, just not me. as for prozac and others like it, based on how i react to even these simpler meds, i'm scared of what those would do to me

 

[WeDontKnowTheFuture]

It's not your body the problem but these medications, don't have any hope to be helped by them, it is truly poison, really. I have been suicidal for no reason during the first two weeks i took them and wasn't before. I've been emotionaly numb, disconected of myself, and i was not aware about what was going one. After one and half month taking them, i was feeling euphoric for no reason like a completely artificial and false one that make my jaw muscle contracting to smile but i wasn't really happy was just a weird chemistry trick doing on myself...like really it is a morbid thing that destroy you from the inside. Some people think that they are helped by them but is only placebo or simply the fact that they have no access to the emotional part wich prevent them to feel difficult emotions. The euphoric thing i describe last only a few weeks, after it is done and you will be disconected from your sensitivy, often lost your sexuality, etc...
They are a scam and a scientific fraud.
Do not listen psychiatrist or doctors.
Good luck

 

[slinkey10]

i know, all i got was cheap tier low efficacy meds that you get when your doctor doesn't think it's that serious. but they seem to work for other people, just not me. as for prozac and others like it, based on how i react to even these simpler meds, i'm scared of what those would do to me

I would only advise meds like prozac short term 6mths max if you need a break from feeling - they blunt your emotions, sometimes this can give you a break from yourself!!!!

But.... when you stop taking them you do get your emotions & feelings back. So, if you havent activley changed anything / lifestyle etc while on them then you're the same person with the same baggage.

 

[ninonino1]

They're neurotoxins. You might be in withdrawal atm which is why you feel worse.

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

I think it's tme for Adderall. You can actually feel it working 15 minutes after you take it.

 

[endofeverything]

I would only advise meds like prozac short term 6mths max if you need a break from feeling - they blunt your emotions, sometimes this can give you a break from yourself!!!!

But.... when you stop taking them you do get your emotions & feelings back. So, if you havent activley changed anything / lifestyle etc while on them then you're the same person with the same baggage.

my emotions are already fairly blunt by default, and knowing how awful i felt with other meds that had a similar blunting effect (especially trazodone) i think i'm honestly better off not taking a medication that works like that. i guess if you're depressed from some sadness or pain, the blunting effect can be beneficial, but i think my depressive symptoms are worsened by the dull and sedated feeling i have to battle every day, and those meds make it worse. it's maybe the wrong approach for me for that reason. but i'm really no specialist, just making guesses based on experience and how i feel.

bupropion was supposed to be stimulating instead of blunting, but unfortunately i didn't get that effect at all and instead just felt more agitated, and suicidal thoughts became so, so much worse. bad luck, i guess. my body doesn't seem to like these things that work on other people.

They're neurotoxins. You might be in withdrawal atm which is why you feel worse.

surprisingly, having no withdrawal symptoms from stopping bupropion. i definitely feel much better and hopeful again though. the buzzing in my ear is still there, hope it goes away eventually. it started when i started this medication last month.

I think it's tme for Adderall. You can actually feel it working 15 minutes after you take it.

honestly i'm kinda interested in trying it. a lot of my self-worth and happiness is tied to how much i can achieve and how much i'm progressing in life (according to my own perception). soo maybe if i get help getting shit done, my depression is resolved again or at least weakened again. maybe i can convince my neurologist to at least try it, if nothing else worked.

i was feeling so well last year as i made a lot of progress with life, and at some points i almost considered myself "cured" from depression for the time being, it was great. unfortunately it came back with insomnia, and the more depressed and unstable i got, the less i managed to achieve, making me feel even worse. eventually, injuries and illnesses added onto it. it's been a spiral these past months.

 

[slinkey10]

i was feeling so well last year as i made a lot of progress with life, and at some points i almost considered myself "cured" from depression for the time being, it was great. unfortunately it came back with insomnia

This is such an undervalued element of any condition & compounds existing conditions.
I have trauma from childhood, I then have insomnia as a result of anxiety going to sleep - medical model is prescribe benzos for a limited time, then cut me off without adressing the route cause.
My point - not sleeping amplifies existing conditions and GP's especially in the UK are not trained to deal with this other than medical model, diagnose, then prescibe meds then say we need to take u off whatever scripted meds u have been given.

i was feeling so well last year as i made a lot of progress with life, and at some points i almost considered myself "cured" from depression

IMO I would be exploring this bit with a 'professional' therapist drilling down into what made u progress, how? & can u replicate this or apply it again - but so many crappy ones out there its a jackpot who u get.

 

[nolifer23]

I'm on setraline 100mg for 15 years now. Without AD I would be dead in a month. I tried reducing dose and started to feel depressed again.

What I can tell you : it takes a minimum o 6 weeks until the pills start to fully work. I tried to kill myself 15 years ago, failed, woke up in hospital next day, after 5 minutes I started to think about suicide again, they put me on antidepressants, kept me locked up for 1 month until the pills started to work (during this month I was constantly suicidal). When they released me, the doctor told my mother "don't leave him alone, not even for 5 minutes, in the next weeks". And he was fcking right, I was still suicidal. But after 2-3 weeks the pills started to have full effect, and they work and work very good. So it takes at least 6 weeks.

 

[dontwakemeup]

It's important to know Psych medications can take up to 4-6 weeks before you notice any changes. I'm sorry you haven't noticed any changes, but I wouldn't suggest you stop trying. Personally, Prozac saved my life and I'm so thankful for it! Medication can only do so much but Prozac gave me the strength to get out of bed and keep going, it made me numb.

I would suggest being honest with you psychiatrist and maybe ask can they add a mood stabilizer with your medication. Maybe that can help. Best wishes to you

 

[Corvette90]

I'm on setraline 100mg for 15 years now. Without AD I would be dead in a month. I tried reducing dose and started to feel depressed again.

What I can tell you : it takes a minimum o 6 weeks until the pills start to fully work. I tried to kill myself 15 years ago, failed, woke up in hospital next day, after 5 minutes I started to think about suicide again, they put me on antidepressants, kept me locked up for 1 month until the pills started to work (during this month I was constantly suicidal). When they released me, the doctor told my mother "don't leave him alone, not even for 5 minutes, in the next weeks". And he was fcking right, I was still suicidal. But after 2-3 weeks the pills started to have full effect, and they work and work very good. So it takes at least 6 weeks.

it's like impossible to come off . I have switched SSRIs so many times. You are correct, you have to be patient with them. Only there are some side effects but what can you do. I guess their the lesser if two evils.

 

[WatchmeBurn]

It's not your body the problem but these medications, don't have any hope to be helped by them, it is truly poison, really. I have been suicidal for no reason during the first two weeks i took them and wasn't before. I've been emotionaly numb, disconected of myself, and i was not aware about what was going one. After one and half month taking them, i was feeling euphoric for no reason like a completely artificial and false one that make my jaw muscle contracting to smile but i wasn't really happy was just a weird chemistry trick doing on myself...like really it is a morbid thing that destroy you from the inside. Some people think that they are helped by them but is only placebo or simply the fact that they have no access to the emotional part wich prevent them to feel difficult emotions. The euphoric thing i describe last only a few weeks, after it is done and you will be disconected from your sensitivy, often lost your sexuality, etc...
They are a scam and a scientific fraud.
Do not listen psychiatrist or doctors.
Good luck

This is not true and it's dangerous misinformation. Anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds absolutely can help and studies show that they do, on aggregate, have a significantly positive effect.

Yes, they aren't as effective as I'd like, but it's wrong and harmful to say that they don't work at all or they they're "poison" or "a scam". Yes, they can have bad side effects, but not all of them will. They are NOT placebo and perform significantly better than placebo in trials. If you get intolerable side effects then don't try to force yourself through it, just stop.

As for OP: I wonder what medications you have tried specifically? If they're the same type (e.g., SSRI) then you would benefit from trying other 'families' of medication. There's a lot out there and 3 isn't that many. I'm not saying it'll definitely work, but I think it's worth trying a few more from a different family if that is possible for you. Also bare in mind some medications specifically work better for people with treatment-resistant depression, with availability depending on your location. E.g., Wellbutrin, Ketamine and Esketamine, Psilocybin, certain antipsychotics like Quetiapine, etc.

I am not here to be pro-forced-life or anything, but I want people to be happy if they can, and until you've exhausted all your options I don't see why you shouldn't keep trying-you're here anyway, for now.

I say this as someone who has a very strong treatment resistance as I have been on 15 medications without help, but most people aren't like me.

 

[WeDontKnowTheFuture]

This is not true and it's dangerous misinformation. Anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds absolutely can help and studies show that they do, on aggregate, have a significantly positive effect.

Yes, they aren't as effective as I'd like, but it's wrong and harmful to say that they don't work at all or they they're "poison" or "a scam". Yes, they can have bad side effects, but not all of them will. They are NOT placebo and perform significantly better than placebo in trials. If you get intolerable side effects then don't try to force yourself through it, just stop.

As for OP: I wonder what medications you have tried specifically? If they're the same type (e.g., SSRI) then you would benefit from trying other 'families' of medication. There's a lot out there and 3 isn't that many. I'm not saying it'll definitely work, but I think it's worth trying a few more from a different family if that is possible for you. Also bare in mind some medications specifically work better for people with treatment-resistant depression, with availability depending on your location. E.g., Wellbutrin, Ketamine and Esketamine, Psilocybin, certain antipsychotics like Quetiapine, etc.

I am not here to be pro-forced-life or anything, but I want people to be happy if they can, and until you've exhausted all your options I don't see why you shouldn't keep trying-you're here anyway, for now.

I say this as someone who has a very strong treatment resistance as I have been on 15 medications without help, but most people aren't like me.

These meds destroy myself to the point where 3 years after i quit them, i still have a terrible health issue wich revealed during the withdrawal of them and i can't fonction.
Also I've only been more depressed with them, never happy.. it doesn't fix any issue just numb you so you're unaware of what's going on and can make you euphoric in a weird and artificial way.. I can't let you tell that i'm spreading misinformation because it is not true, it's not just my experience there a lot of testimony on the internet about what these meds really do to us. ( survivingantidepressants is a website where you can read experiences ) Mainstream culture put them forward for the benefit of pharmaceutical industries while there is no evidence or proof that depression results from a serotonin deficiency. And of course it is not the case, depression isn't even a disease but a state that comes when you experience terrible life circumstances, internal and external.
Our society and doctors did a nice propaganda job with SSRI. They even don't know what they are, they are ignorant about them. Taking is ssri is harmful and prevent true healing.

 

[areyousafe??]

Are you on a high enough dose?

It took more than a month for me to finally feel the effects from antidepressants.

 

[Rhymester]

It's the same for me. Still feeling awful. I didn't think anything can help me. Evolution failed me for sure. I'm so sorry that nothing is helping you. I know for sure that I can't be helped.

 

[divinemistress36]

I heard after 4 antidepressants if none of them work then you are treatment resistant and to look into other treatments like ketamine/tms. I havent had luck on them either but they are impossible to get off of it seems