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So I read a lot of posts here by people who are suicidal because they were abused in the past or have some kind of chronic pain/health condition and that made me curious. Is there any one here who is physically healthy(no pain/health issues) and had a normal childhood growing up but somehow still ended up here??
So I read a lot of posts here by people who are suicidal because they were abused in the past or have some kind of chronic pain/health condition and that made me curious. Is there any one here who is physically healthy(no pain/health issues) and had a normal childhood growing up but somehow still ended up here??
I kind of fit that category, i used to fit it more than I do now, but I probably do still fit.
in the past few years I suffer from hemiplegic migraines which while (usually) harmless mimic stroke symptoms and are super unpleasant. Even with that I can hold down a job, i'm not sure what a normal childhood is but nothing inherently traumatic happened until I was an adult.
The migraines though, meh I could live with that it's my emotional state that does not want to be here
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My childhood was ok. No health issues or anything. It was high school that really started to make me see the world for what it really is, and started my depression. And then it only got worse as time went on, and I went into adulthood.
Yep, unless you count being raised by hateful, careeristic, natalists as abuse. Lost motivation to talk to 99% of people somewhere around 7 or so years old. I don't call it depression as depression assumes irrationality. I believe I strive for rationality, therefore my pessimism should be thought of as a reactionary view, or a philosphy, not depression. During freshman year of college I unironically spoke somewhere around 1k words, the entire school year. I'm pretty healthy though, wish I could donate my body to someone else.
My childhood wasn't great but I got through it. I don't have a debilitating illness. I can function in social situations. I've had good jobs. I do have a mild form of depression, but it's manageable and doesn't affect my life that much.
I feel like a bit of a fraud being here, seeing all the pain and suffering of others with valid reasons to want/need to take their own lives, and here I am only through choice.
I made a decision many years ago that I didn't want to grow old. Over the past 10 years or so, I've been waiting for my money to run out, and through a combination of apathy and procrastination, I've avoided looking for work. That time is now here, and I'm having regrets, but that was the whole point of the plan - to put myself in this situation so I couldn't back out.
Is choosing to die the same as being suicidal? I don't know, but here I am.
My childhood wasn't great but I got through it. I don't have a debilitating illness. I can function in social situations. I've had good jobs. I do have a mild form of depression, but it's manageable and doesn't affect my life that much.
I feel like a bit of a fraud being here, seeing all the pain and suffering of others with valid reasons to want/need to take their own lives, and here I am only through choice.
I made a decision many years ago that I didn't want to grow old. Over the past 10 years or so, I've been waiting for my money to run out, and through a combination of apathy and procrastination, I've avoided looking for work. That time is now here, and I'm having regrets, but that was the whole point of the plan - to put myself in this situation so I couldn't back out.
Is choosing to die the same as being suicidal? I don't know, but here I am.
Oy you don't have to feel like a fraud
Not every single person on here suffers from depression. Some just decide they've had enough of living. Sure that feeling doesn't happen overnight but sometimes, it just does. I've seen a couple of people here say they don't suffer from any mental illness, have had a perfect life lots of money but struggle with a desire to not want to be alive.
I wasn't abused as a kid and had quite a wonderful childhood, but as i grew into an adult i found out what life was really like... mainly it's the fear of becoming homeless and suffering boredom, hunger and the bitter cold. For me it's more of a practicality: a swift death vs a slow, agonizing one.
I was born neurotic and mental illness runs in my family. Because my mom was mentally unstable and was very neurotic she was often abusive to me, physically, verbally and emotionally. I would say in my case, it's half genetic and half environmental.
But I can totally see how some people might still end up with depression and other mental health problems solely based on their genetics.
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