• Hey Guest,

    As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.

    Bitcoin Address (BTC): 39deg9i6Zp1GdrwyKkqZU6rAbsEspvLBJt

    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9

    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8

  • Security update: At around 2:28AM EST, the site was labeled as malicious by Google erroneously, causing users to get a "Dangerous site" warning in most browsers. It appears that this was done by mistake and has been reversed by Google. It may take a few hours for you to stop seeing those warnings.

    If you're still getting these warnings, please let a member of staff know.
L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,134
Hi,
Does anyone remembers the toxic incidents and abuse others done to you like it happened yesterday? I still remember many things through my whole life even if its 10+ years, I can remember clearly the abuse and how shitty other humans are.

I still remembers clearly the corporate abuse and shit that happened years ago and it looks like it happened yesterday.

Its strange how people say one should forget because it happened long time ago, and be astonished when I tell them I clearly remember the abuse and hate the offenders to this day.

Toxic pieces of shit leave their bruises on us. I wish I was never existed with these creatures.
 
  • Like
Reactions: msexit, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Iwant2sleepforever and 10 others
L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,134
I remember and be angry on this past incidents. I don't know why I even remember them and remember the shitty life and people.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, Maggotymaggots and 2 others
Mr2005

Mr2005

Don't shoot the messenger, give me the gun
Sep 25, 2018
3,622
Me. I remember these things like they were yesterday. My theory on why is because we think about it every day which keeps it so fresh in our minds. When we think back it feels like yesterday because it was when we last thought about it. Other memories of lesser importance fade and if my memory 's jogged about something long forgotten then I really feel the passage of time even if it's more recent than what feels like yesterday. I'm sorry others did you wrong, in my case it's me whose at fault
 
  • Like
Reactions: Trashcan, throwaway777, Maggotymaggots and 1 other person
M

Miss clefable

Enlightened
Aug 23, 2018
1,577
Yes I can I have photographic memory
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, throwaway777 and 3 others
Nem

Nem

Drs suck mega ass!
Sep 3, 2018
1,489
I think it depends on how we are feeling. If we're feeling good then won't think of toxic situations, I have those feelings now and also regrets on the past which got me in this situation. Holy crap are things ever bad right now, I'm barely hanging on...
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, RottingFlowerBrains and 2 others
S

Schopenhauer

Enlightened
Oct 3, 2018
1,133
My brain makes a point of having me remember all the bad stuff that happened to me, the embarrassments, and also the people I've wronged. Whoever designed humans is a bastard.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, throwaway777 and 4 others
Going Home

Going Home

Specialist
Sep 21, 2018
357
It's hard to forget when people isolate and gaslight you then remind you how screwed up you are. It's really hard to forget when they say its in God's hands now because I can't fix you, or whatever.
Feels just like it happened yesterday.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, bag.of.cats and 3 others
U

undertherainbow

Member
Sep 21, 2018
80
Yes, I remember all of it, right down to smells and physical feeling. It drives me crazy. I sometimes pick out a color that I see and try to spell it backwards to clear my mind.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, throwaway777 and 2 others
C

Circles

Visionary
Sep 3, 2018
2,297
It's hard to forget the smell of blood and tears.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, throwaway777 and 3 others
U

undertherainbow

Member
Sep 21, 2018
80
It's hard to forget the smell of blood and tears.
I smell blood way too often. Why do you smell blood if you don't mind me asking?
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan and Circles
C

Circles

Visionary
Sep 3, 2018
2,297
I smell blood way too often. Why do you smell blood if you don't mind me asking?
Got into a car crash with my friend. He was driving and a semi truck swerved in our lane and literally crushed him to death. Still tremor from the shock. The smell of iron, salt and burnt metal will never leave. There are other incidents but that one will haunt me until I kill myself.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, bag.of.cats and 7 others
U

undertherainbow

Member
Sep 21, 2018
80
Got into a car crash with my friend. He was driving and a semi truck swerved in our lane and literally crushed him to death. Still tremor from the shock. The smell of iron, salt and burnt metal will never leave. There are other incidents but that one will haunt me until I kill myself.
I'm sorry. I understand <3
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, throwaway777 and 2 others
C

Circles

Visionary
Sep 3, 2018
2,297
I'm sorry. I understand <3
It's alright man I appreciate the kind words. The only thing about it is he was the closest of a 'friend' I ever had with another human being and even at that we were just as distant. I hate myself for not telling him thank you for being the only friend I had. Good times never last.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, throwaway777 and 3 others
M

millefeui

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2018
1,034
I try not to, but it doesn't always work, of course...
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, Schopenhauer and 3 others
wiIIow

wiIIow

Arcanist
Sep 22, 2018
458
for how shitty my memory is otherwise, I do remember insane details about traumatic events. Can't remember anything else surrounding those events, or the memories I do still have feel like they're not my own. My whole timeline and sequence of events is so fucked up. But the things I don't want to remember - smells, sounds, microscopic insignificant details - I will never be able to forget.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, throwaway777 and 2 others
BaconCheeseburger

BaconCheeseburger

Comfort-eating
Aug 4, 2018
693
School and uni are as vivid in my mind as ever. Uni makes sense because I graduated 2 years ago, but school was even longer back yet it still finds ways to drag me down.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, throwaway777 and 3 others
L

Living_Ghost

Student
Aug 13, 2018
181
I am tortured with thoughts and memories all day every day. Most of my present thoughts are about suicide methods.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, Schopenhauer and 3 others
Tragoedia Vitae

Tragoedia Vitae

Experienced
Oct 14, 2018
230
It would be fantastic if I could actually forget all the things which have happened to me. Unfortunately, I can't. That's because my mind simply won't allow me to forget. Sad and painful memories constantly haunt me in the form of intrusive thoughts which never fail to blight even my happier days. People who can actually forget---oh, how I envy them!

If only I couldn't think! Then I wouldn't remember. But I can, and I do. My mind is gradually becoming fossilized from all this obsessive remembrance, and I loathe every minute of it. My mind is no longer my own---why keep on living then?
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, Schopenhauer and 3 others
T

Taylored

I've figured it out
Sep 20, 2018
321
I remember every single little detail from years back even if It was brief conversation I remember It. It's absolute torture.
 
  • Like
Reactions: msexit, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan and 4 others
ParamitePie

ParamitePie

Experienced
Oct 11, 2018
218
Surprisingly, not really. It's all pretty vague, except for really unconnected incidents, like the one time a classmate burst into tears and said I was bullying him, despite the fact I had never talked to him, or about him to anyone. There was also that one time a skinhead chased me across a busy street with a rusty syringe he picked up on the sidewalk when I was walking home from school. I still have no idea what that was about. Or that one time a homeless man threatened to attack me with a box cutter for not having cigarettes on me. Or that one time some girl tried to get her boyfriend to beat me up while I was walking home. A whole load of strange incidents, but none of them really contributed to my mental state.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Trashcan, lv-gras and 1 other person
M

Miro

Member
Oct 17, 2018
48
I remember a lot of it and, occasionally, I newly remember something else.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and Trashcan
Lra888

Lra888

Enlightened
Sep 30, 2018
1,140
Hi,
Does anyone remembers the toxic incidents and abuse others done to you like it happened yesterday? I still remember many things through my whole life even if its 10+ years, I can remember clearly the abuse and how shitty other humans are.

I still remembers clearly the corporate abuse and shit that happened years ago and it looks like it happened yesterday.

Its strange how people say one should forget because it happened long time ago, and be astonished when I tell them I clearly remember the abuse and hate the offenders to this day.

Toxic pieces of shit leave their bruises on us. I wish I was never existed with these creatures.
Yes. Especialy if the incidents and their aftermath still effect me.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and Trashcan
Trashcan

Trashcan

Trash
Aug 31, 2018
1,234
Sometimes. I've mostly suppressed painful memories. But sometimes I think back to embarrassing moments and cringe. It has kept me up at night a few times.

But most of my thoughts are revolves around suicide. I think a lot about my method, preparation, making sure I don't get found in time, et . And then I also think a lot about other people who died, and envy the ones who were lucky enough to die young.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals

Similar threads

Comfydant
Replies
14
Views
606
Suicide Discussion
Comfydant
Comfydant
ashxia
Replies
5
Views
287
Suicide Discussion
HeartThatFeeds
HeartThatFeeds
C
Replies
3
Views
194
Suicide Discussion
Wolf-Alice
Wolf-Alice
time.is.near
Replies
3
Views
227
Suicide Discussion
anemicamoeba
A