beseechgod
Member
- Dec 7, 2024
- 40
I'm already dead but my body keeps on breathing. Torturing me. I get no fulfillment out of anything so I'm just going to lay here until I die or someone forces me to move. Does time go by faster as you get older? In my experience it has but I hope it keeps accelerating. I'm only 26 so I have a long time to wait but that's ok. My room is my tomb and my bed my sarcophagus. It's peaceful to just accept this. I just have to get up and get food once in a while because I can't take the pain of starvation. I also have to continue taking my antidepressants every day so the mental pain can be as mild as possible. I have compassion for this long-suffering mind/body that I'm trapped in. It's just a scared creature that does what it can to avoid pain. It doesn't realize that continuing to live is torturing the soul stuck here with it. If only I could communicate with it, it would know death is the best option and simply shut itself down overnight. But unfortunately I'm unable to even communicate with my body enough to do things most people can let alone convince it to die. Maybe it will get the message eventually.