Story Borken beyond repair

[Darkover]

i broke myself with headphone of all things the bass killed the ears and brain to the point where i've given my self a very bad case of tinnitus and
a brain injury to point where i can't do anything anymore i was bedbound for 2 years only ordering takeaways off just eat so i could eat
eventually i was detained under the mental health act where i received treatment for paranoid schizophrenia with olanzapine 10mg daily,
i've been diagnosed with schizophrenia since the age of 18, i am now 35, while i was in hospital i got better to point where i wasn't bedbound anymore
i'am still in physical pain all the time, i am uncomfortable all the time,
i can feel my brain hurting from the monment i wake up to the monment i sleep
i was addicted to weed and got lot's of pleasure from listening to music and smoking weed after about a year of doing this none stop i started to develop
pain in my ears and brain but because i was addicted to weed and the pleasure of listening to music i ingnored the signs and carryed on into it became unbearable
i spent all my adult life being suicidal from the age of 18 onwards a relationship breakdown caused me to turn schizophrenic
i've had only one sexual relationship between the age of 16 and 18 i'm now 35 and havent had a relationship for 17 years
i've lived with this brain injury since july 2016 i've been to the doctors and i was referred to the ear nose and throat specialist they diagnosed me with tinnitus and prescribed me with diazepam as a muscle relaxant for the muscle in my ears that didn't help at all
they referred me for a mri scan i've had a mri scan on my brain but they didn't find anything wrong with my brain i know i have a brain injury as i am
a software engineer but i can't program anymore i've lost interest in activities that i use to enjoy due to this constant uncomfortable feeling like there is a vise around my brain tightening i have a fate worse than death it be humane to let me die
there is no treatment for my brain injury i just have to live with it and that just a living hell
i just wish that choosing to die was a human right i'll probably end up hanging myself as i've got everything i need to do so
i can only hope death is not the end for all time i really want to get better and live but i know that's impossible


I understand why murder is a crime since you're taking someone else's life by how is suicide a crime?
It's a person choosing to end their own life. They were forced into this world and now they've had enough and have decided to end it.
If you go by the belief that life is about free will and choice why is it wrong for someone to use their free will to kill themselves?
This is a cliché saying, but most people didn't ask to be born.
They were forced here and now can't even kill themselves without the risk of failing and being forced to continue suffering.
Sure there's ways to guarantee death but it's still discouraged.
I feel like people should be able to choose whether they want to live anymore

 

[ClownMe]

I feel like people should be able to choose whether they want to live anymore

Couldn't agree more, the only reason that we aren't allowed to choose whether we want to die or not is because of work and taxes. It's a joke.

 

[Jumping_realms]

Welcome, I am pretty new here, also.

I think many people just kind of overlook suicide, simply because it doesn't apply to them. So many families are fortunate enough for it to never be a topic, and for not even one family member to need therapy. I guess for me, It becomes really bad when pro-lifers are against assisted suicide for one example. There are plenty of reasons, but I honestly still don't know if it's just that they can't fathom the misery that someone dealing with severe mental health issues/terminal illnesses goes through, or what. How could you not have empathy and compassion for someone with a progressive cancer with approximately 6 months- 1 year left, that wants nothing more than to end the misery YOU aren't feeling a little earlier?

I'd guess if pro-lifers themselves, had suicidal thoughts, or terminal illnesses to deal with 24/7, they would change their tune in a second.

 

[FuneralCry]

This life really can be cruel, and our bodies can be prisons. I'm sorry you are suffering so much. I strongly believe in the right to die and it would mean a much more compassionate society, if it was legalised everywhere. We have no obligations to stay alive as we did not ask to be here in the first place. Expecting people to suffer in a hopeless situation for decades on end against their wishes is cruel. In the end only we are experiencing what we are going through so it should be us who makes the choice when it is the time to end it, rather than society dictating you must live at all costs.