• Hey Guest,

    An update on the OFCOM situation: As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. OFCOM, the UK’s communications regulator, has singled out our community, demanding compliance with their Online Safety Act despite our minimal UK presence. This is a blatant overreach, and they have been sending letters pressuring us to comply with their censorship agenda.

    Our platform is already blocked by many UK ISPs, yet they continue their attempts to stifle free speech. Standing up to this kind of regulatory overreach requires lots of resources to maintain our infrastructure and fight back against these unjust demands. If you value our community and want to support us during this time, we would greatly appreciate any and all donations.

    Read more about the situation here: Click to View Post

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC): 39deg9i6Zp1GdrwyKkqZU6rAbsEspvLBJt
    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9
    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8
C

CallmeWill4719

Member
Nov 11, 2024
94
Often really really jealous of those who are better at "hiding it". Everyone around me knows how depressed I am. They hate seeing that.

So then I think about suicide so I'm not such a bother to them anymore. This I know it's not really a solution either because they're going to be devastated.

It's like either way nobody wins. We're all supposed to just "deal with it" I'm supposed to stay here and suffer anyway, or pass on that suffering to them. When it bothers them seeing me like this and not being able to do anything about it.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Promised Heaven, Ringo, BlooBerryBanjo3000 and 1 other person
ningen_shikkaku

ningen_shikkaku

Member
Dec 12, 2024
26
This is something I still struggle with today.

I'd say I'm pretty good at hiding it, but unfortunately... I have my moments.

My family has figured out that telling me outright how they feel about it will only make me worse, so while they say they are supportive... a sliver of their real feelings comes through. It's always, "Do you know how your actions affect me? Do you know how your whole diagnoses affects me?" and hints of being selfish.

I'm well intertwined with the healthcare system here. I am well aware of my issues and diagnoses, and my father (at any medical setting) would love to insist that he too, is aware of it all... But I know at home and anywhere else, he refuses to acknowledge any of my issues. There's nothing wrong with his child, after all... He doesn't want to admit it to himself. That his child is wrong somehow, and he'd much rather continue living with the 'me' that I present to the world.

He doesn't know me at all. Whenever I make mention of anything relating to my diagnoses, he simply doesn't respond or brushes it off. That hurts so much more.

We're expected to brush it off. Live like others do. They tell us that seeing us like this makes them feel bad, and we should think about that; but the problem is, is that we do. We think about it a lot.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Yay!
Reactions: ishiguro, Promised Heaven, CallmeWill4719 and 1 other person

Similar threads

vampire2002
Replies
2
Views
282
Recovery
Jorvak
Jorvak
Mooncry
Replies
12
Views
518
Suicide Discussion
Shadows From Hell
Shadows From Hell
Sleeper System
Replies
0
Views
97
Suicide Discussion
Sleeper System
Sleeper System
ma0
Replies
20
Views
641
Suicide Discussion
NonEssential
NonEssential