charaunderground
* Let justice be done.
- Nov 29, 2024
- 140
I think I've had this thought because, by the time I was an older student but still in school, awareness and worry regarding shootings was starting to peak. I'm early/mid 20s for context. I have distinct memories of having several meetings at school of learning how to improvise things like tourniquet or how to stop bleeding in case someone shot up our school. A lot of times, it was implied in these meetings that the kid who tackled / interrupted the shooter was basically a hero / martyr figure for potentially saving lives.
Obviously, these thoughts are pretty childish and don't make a ton of sense. It'll also probably never happen. But I still have these occasional thoughts of doing xyz in a Bad Situation to sort of indirectly cause my own death without seemingly like I intended to cause my own death. Like, it's objectively seen as better to say "xyz died a hero doing x" than "xyz killed themself" after all.
I think there was an "A Softer World" strip about a similar subject, so I don't think this is a me-only experience or thought?
Obviously, these thoughts are pretty childish and don't make a ton of sense. It'll also probably never happen. But I still have these occasional thoughts of doing xyz in a Bad Situation to sort of indirectly cause my own death without seemingly like I intended to cause my own death. Like, it's objectively seen as better to say "xyz died a hero doing x" than "xyz killed themself" after all.
I think there was an "A Softer World" strip about a similar subject, so I don't think this is a me-only experience or thought?