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Tiburcio

Guest
I wonder if some of you lost somebody in life due to distance, death, betrayal...

I know how hard is missing somebody you know it's gone forever. What are your experiences? How marked are you for it? Who was that person? Share your experiences, if you don't care talking about it of course.
 
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Caustic Cardinals

Caustic Cardinals

Enlightened
Sep 1, 2018
1,339
I wonder if some of you lost somebody in life due to distance, death, betrayal...

I know how hard is missing somebody you know it's gone forever. What are your experiences? How marked are you for it? Who was that person? Share your experiences, if you don't care talking about it of course.
I do I miss the me that nver was, the me who was loved, the me that never was ANLONE. I miss myself.
 
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RM5998

RM5998

Sack of Meat
Sep 3, 2018
2,202
I miss my crush, who's now drifted out of my life due to time and distance. And the extent of that longing increases the longer I remain in the state I'm in.
 
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M

Morning Angel

Useless Broken Wings
Aug 8, 2018
618
I miss the friends I used to have, even if those bonds were deeper to me than to them.

I miss a couple people I know from here who have now passed, one of whom I barely even interacted with.
 
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Caustic Cardinals

Caustic Cardinals

Enlightened
Sep 1, 2018
1,339
I miss my mom
 
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Abel

Abel

Member
Sep 11, 2018
61
I miss all the friends that I cut ties with. They were all really good people, people I had been close with for years, but my issues made me push them away until I was all alone.
 
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BaconCheeseburger

BaconCheeseburger

Comfort-eating
Aug 4, 2018
693
I miss my ex best friend. We were so close for years, did everything together, slept together (and I can honestly say he was the best I've ever had), but then he slept with a girl I was planning to ask out and things went sour. I've mostly gotten over it all but it would be nice to still have him in my life.
 
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RottingFlowerBrains

RottingFlowerBrains

Student
Sep 10, 2018
193
I miss the love of my life Cj and I miss him everyday and I always will.

And I miss my Son. He's with the Angels now
 
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akosineenee

akosineenee

Invisible idiot
Aug 22, 2018
224
Yes. I easily get attached to people and remember them long past the point when they forgot about me. Despite everything that went wrong, the indifference and coldness that grew--there are things that I miss about them, small things mostly. Things that they probably thought inconsequential but I find endearing.
 
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Lizzie S.

Lizzie S.

Experienced
Sep 2, 2018
258
I miss my ex. He's amazing, though didn't care about me much. It really sucks missing someone who doesn't care about you. Partly why I'm suicidal.
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
I do I miss the me that nver was, the me who was loved, the me that never was ANLONE. I miss myself.
Yes never self actualizing is horrible. So many people are destroyed early and then spend your life trying to struggle through instead of being able to have a quality life. Nothing is really stopping me from enjoying life but yet I don't go out to enjoy it. It's not like I can't just go places, it feels like maybe I'm hiding because of deep shame.
 
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Iwant2sleepforever

Iwant2sleepforever

Experienced
Sep 8, 2018
227
I miss my best friend any time I'm not around her not to sound creepy. Hopefully I can hang out with her soon.
 
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RottingFlowerBrains

RottingFlowerBrains

Student
Sep 10, 2018
193
Yes. I easily get attached to people and remember them long past the point when they forgot about me. Despite everything that went wrong, the indifference and coldness that grew--there are things that I miss about them, small things mostly. Things that they probably thought inconsequential but I find endearing.
I'm the same kind of person but have always wondered why I am that way? Any insight into why you are that way? It makes me feel like a Alien because I've never understood that behaviour in myself
 
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akosineenee

akosineenee

Invisible idiot
Aug 22, 2018
224
I'm the same kind of person but have always wondered why I am that way? Any insight into why you are that way? It makes me feel like a Alien because I've never understood that behaviour in myself
I wish I knew. Sometimes I think because I like the ideation of the person or of the relationship we can share (whether platonic or romantic). I'm full of one-sided expectations that are constantly met with disappointments. Someone said that I need to have self-worth and self-love; but I only ever hate myself.
 
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M

medusa

Student
Sep 1, 2018
175
I wonder if some of you lost somebody in life due to distance, death, betrayal...

I know how hard is missing somebody you know it's gone forever. What are your experiences? How marked are you for it? Who was that person? Share your experiences, if you don't care talking about it of course.

I loved a guy from age 16-21. We never even dated, but we were best friends, we took trips together, we saw each other every day for 2 years, we were in the same clubs. He invited me over, he told me secrets he never told anyone else and we were really so close up until I told him I loved him three times and then he said he didn't love me back. So I ended our friendship. Afterwards he was such an asshole to me and even begged me to come back, but I didn't. I am now engaged with another man and must say that there are many levels of intimacy without sex or even kissing (I am not asexual btw) and knowing that guy from 16-21 was the happiest time in my life. I loved him with everything I had and losing him was one of the worst things imaginable to me. I hope I see him after I die so we can make amends
 
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IDontWantToBreathe

IDontWantToBreathe

Member
Aug 20, 2018
55
One of my best friends died when I was 16. We were friends since we were 5.

We used to skateboard together like every other day and even when my family kicked me out at 14 he let me stay with him. He died because of a car accident and I miss him so much. We spoke the night of the accident before he went and I told him not to go out. I had a bad feeling because they were joyriding. The driver flipped the car and my friend wasn't wearing a seatbelt so he was ejected from the car and died a couple days later in the hospital.

I don't think I'll ever be able to accept it or process it.. I just wish I could've stopped him from going. I hope he knows I love him. I don't believe in heaven but there's literally nowhere else he could've ended up. R.I.P brother...
 
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Caustic Cardinals

Caustic Cardinals

Enlightened
Sep 1, 2018
1,339
Yes never self actualizing is horrible. So many people are destroyed early and then spend your life trying to struggle through instead of being able to have a quality life. Nothing is really stopping me from enjoying life but yet I don't go out to enjoy it. It's not like I can't just go places, it feels like maybe I'm hiding because of deep shame.

struggle with that shame or go through life on your own fast lane
 
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Mayfil

Mayfil

Member
Aug 25, 2018
29
I miss my ex who vanished with nary a trace. recently got in contact with one of her friends only to learn she's in and out of psychwards and thats all i will ever know i guess
 
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akosineenee

akosineenee

Invisible idiot
Aug 22, 2018
224
One of my best friends died when I was 16. We were friends since we were 5.

We used to skateboard together like every other day and even when my family kicked me out at 14 he let me stay with him. He died because of a car accident and I miss him so much. We spoke the night of the accident before he went and I told him not to go out. I had a bad feeling because they were joyriding. The driver flipped the car and my friend wasn't wearing a seatbelt so he was ejected from the car and died a couple days later in the hospital.

I don't think I'll ever be able to accept it or process it.. I just wish I could've stopped him from going. I hope he knows I love him. I don't believe in heaven but there's literally nowhere else he could've ended up. R.I.P brother...
Your story resonates with me. I had a friend who died from a motorcycle accident. He was only 23. He was studying computer programming and played bass guitar. I remember us hanging out with 6-7 other people in the (now defunct) one-room band rehearsal studio in town. Sometimes practicing on the steps of the church while other kids were skateboarding. We had a falling out and I've always regretted not saying I'm sorry. He rode at the back of the motorcycle without a helmet, which I don't think would have really mattered. It was in the early morning, he and his friend were drunk when they were killed on the spot in a head-on collision with a jeepney. It was sudden. I thought I had more time to make amends. I always told him not to drink too much.
 
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Sundayafternoon

Sundayafternoon

Cosmic panic
May 18, 2018
394
I wonder if some of you lost somebody in life due to distance, death, betrayal...

I know how hard is missing somebody you know it's gone forever. What are your experiences? How marked are you for it? Who was that person? Share your experiences, if you don't care talking about it of course.

Previously, I would have said I miss all my family members lost to death (mom,Gma, 2uncles, 2 aunts, 1 sister, 1 cousin) estranged family ( 2 aunts, 1 uncle, bout 8 cousins).

Today, I don't really miss anyone. I had to train myself to not think about people who weren't there. Had I not, I would've had a mental breakdown in high school.

I'm also very good with practising out of sight out of mind. It helps my anxiety. I have always had a hard time imaging people think about me if I'm not around. So, I trained myself to not think about anyone in any real detail.

However, people will cross my mind. If I'm in, ahem, the right mood, I may smile at the thought of the person or wonder how they are.

I rarely, if ever, get hit wth the desire to see or be physically in the presence of anyone. I think that's what people mean by "I miss you".

Plus, I don't share much about myself with (regular/normal) people in general cause I don't want them asking a bunch of dumb questions or offering unsolicited advice on how to better myself and my situation.

"Don't tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody"— Holden Caulfield
 
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Blackbird

Blackbird

Member
Jul 23, 2018
34
I miss my childhood friends, I should have never cut ties with them. I also miss my college friends, I wish I had got to know them better, if depression and anxiety hadn't got the best of me.
 
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weedoge

weedoge

Banned
Jul 12, 2018
1,525
Yes never self actualizing is horrible. So many people are destroyed early and then spend your life trying to struggle through instead of being able to have a quality life. Nothing is really stopping me from enjoying life but yet I don't go out to enjoy it. It's not like I can't just go places, it feels like maybe I'm hiding because of deep shame.
I feel pretty similarly. I like to tell myself I was destined to be this way, but really I was just affected at such a young age and never learned how to move on.
 
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S

Snee

Student
Aug 3, 2018
135
i miss myself.i need to find me.
 
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BlackDragonof1989

BlackDragonof1989

Mage
Jul 12, 2018
526
Very much so. I miss a few very much, in fact.
 
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D

Deleted member 1768

Enlightened
Aug 15, 2018
1,107
I miss all the friends that I cut ties with. They were all really good people, people I had been close with for years, but my issues made me push them away until I was all alone.
I am a jinx. I miss my brothers, sister, mother and father. I miss all of the friends who have died before me. I miss their protection against deceit, trauma, and horror. I miss their honesty...I miss them all. I would have traded places with any one of them. I am ...so tired.
 
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DeathBecomesMe

DeathBecomesMe

Student
Sep 9, 2018
143
I've lost people over the last few years. A gran, other gran, then a friend on his motorcycle age 16, a few months later my girlfriend in a scooter accident age 16, then my father at 19, and then a good friend in an accident and more. Not that it's a competition, but wow a lot of people have died already. Only my one gran reached a ripe old age. I know life isn't the easiest and that of all species on Earth, people have it the hardest. So when people die, I often think that in a sense they are lucky, they don't have to worry about anything ever again.

I would accept, and get stronger with each death, but then this year my sweet angel dachshund boy passed way before his time. I miss him so much, he got cancer and the vet didn't pick it up. I always knew how much he meant to me, and feel I failed him and betrayed myself by trusting the vet.

I will never be the same person again knowing that he wasn't able to live out his life fully and receive all the love he was due. I'm a strong person but I miss my sweet handsome sausage so much and it's the toughest thing in the world to let go and move on. I wish I was dead instead, I would swap places in a heartbeat. One day, maybe soon I can be at peace, back to dust with you for eternity. Love you forever Rolls!
 
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