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asiht

asiht

Member
Oct 17, 2019
43
I'm 43 years old and I worked at the same hospital for almost 20 years before I was fired in December. So I don't have a lot of experience applying for and getting different jobs.
My $ is going to run out soon, and I am very scared for the future. To be honest, I have not been trying as hard to get a job as I "should" be. Partly I'm stuck in paralysis and fear...
Thinking that somehow things are stacked against me, that I won't even be able to find a job, that I'm somehow not good enough. (Even though I've had a friend tell me she would love to have the employment history that I have).
I'm also terrified of what the future holds. I generally don't do well with major life changes, and I end up staying in unbearable situations for far too long.

Honestly I have no idea wtf I'm going to do right now. I'm at the point now where I'm about to have to decide between paying child support, and paying rent. I'll choose rent of course, but that's not going to go well with the baby mama.

I'm worried that I'll end up homeless in a few months. And I think I'd rather CTB than do that.

I don't know. I "need" to get off my ass and try harder to get a job, but it's like I can't. I just keep putting it off.

Is there anyone else who can relate?
 
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Reactions: NoPoint2Life, WhatMightHaveBeen and Nero999
Agon321

Agon321

I use google translate
Aug 21, 2023
1,564
Lack of self-confidence is one of my biggest problems.

I am younger than you (a lot), but in my relatively short life, lack of self-confidence is a problem.
However, in my case, lack of self-confidence is a result of other problems.
This may be related, among other things, to the fact that I come from a dysfunctional family.

I also hate big changes.
I have to have everything planned in my head, even going to the store.
If something unexpected happens, chaos begins in my head.
I lack spontaneity.
I have to act according to patterns.

I haven't worked much in my life, but going to a new job that I know nothing about is a grim prospect for me.
I have no self-confidence, so I immediately think that I will be terrible.
Unfortunately, I am often terrible at something, because I am simply stressed and stress increases my lack of self-confidence and knowledge.
Low IQ is another issue that certainly also affects this.

Gaining self-confidence is hard because it has to be connected to overall positive changes in life. It's a process.
I can't change my life positively.

So yes, I have this problem.
 
N

Nero999

Member
Sep 18, 2024
19
I'm 43 years old and I worked at the same hospital for almost 20 years before I was fired in December. So I don't have a lot of experience applying for and getting different jobs.
My $ is going to run out soon, and I am very scared for the future. To be honest, I have not been trying as hard to get a job as I "should" be. Partly I'm stuck in paralysis and fear...
Thinking that somehow things are stacked against me, that I won't even be able to find a job, that I'm somehow not good enough. (Even though I've had a friend tell me she would love to have the employment history that I have).
I'm also terrified of what the future holds. I generally don't do well with major life changes, and I end up staying in unbearable situations for far too long.

Honestly I have no idea wtf I'm going to do right now. I'm at the point now where I'm about to have to decide between paying child support, and paying rent. I'll choose rent of course, but that's not going to go well with the baby mama.

I'm worried that I'll end up homeless in a few months. And I think I'd rather CTB than do that.

I don't know. I "need" to get off my ass and try harder to get a job, but it's like I can't. I just keep putting it off.

Is there anyone else who can relate?
Yes. Pretty much.

Easily overwhelmed, physically shaking, sick with any decision I have to make.

Massive fear of making the wrong decision.
 
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
21,209
I frequently get mislabeled as having a self esteem issue. People believe I'm too hard on myself but they're wrong. If anything I'm not hard enough on myself. I haven't even ever been able to properly express just how inept, incompetent, lazy, stupid, cowardly, useless, selfish, and evil I am. No amount of words can express just how awful I am. I guess that means my issue is the reverse where I'm way too nice to myself when I should be even harsher.
 
W

WhatMightHaveBeen

Member
Sep 16, 2024
50
I'm 43 years old and I worked at the same hospital for almost 20 years before I was fired in December. So I don't have a lot of experience applying for and getting different jobs.
My $ is going to run out soon, and I am very scared for the future. To be honest, I have not been trying as hard to get a job as I "should" be. Partly I'm stuck in paralysis and fear...
Thinking that somehow things are stacked against me, that I won't even be able to find a job, that I'm somehow not good enough. (Even though I've had a friend tell me she would love to have the employment history that I have).
I'm also terrified of what the future holds. I generally don't do well with major life changes, and I end up staying in unbearable situations for far too long.

Honestly I have no idea wtf I'm going to do right now. I'm at the point now where I'm about to have to decide between paying child support, and paying rent. I'll choose rent of course, but that's not going to go well with the baby mama.

I'm worried that I'll end up homeless in a few months. And I think I'd rather CTB than do that.

I don't know. I "need" to get off my ass and try harder to get a job, but it's like I can't. I just keep putting it off.

Is there anyone else who can relate?
Yep.
 
ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
5,355
No, I don't have a self esteem issue. I don't want to be capable of doing things like getting a job in the first place. I may be less competent than other humans at life but I don't care because I never wanted life to begin with. I don't hate myself because of this because I'm not the one who is wrong. I'm merely different than others and there's nothing wrong with being different. I was also born against my consent so I shouldn't have to be good enough for others if I don't want to be
 
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Final_Freedom

Final_Freedom

-
Oct 2, 2024
25
I'm 22 and without a job for almost 1 year now, when the government cuts my money (which will be soon I imagine) I will need to kill myself, I can't survive on the job market, always get fired or quit because I can't handle it
 
W

wCvML2

Member
Nov 15, 2021
455
Yes, life is happening to me while I sit in the passenger sit because I'm terrified of using the (figurative) steering wheel. I really relate to being stuck in paralysis and fear. I'm at a point of being so sick of it that I have to make a change too, either take active action to make positive change for life to become less insufferable or end it. My current job (blue collar - minimum wage) is destroying my spine due to constant physical strain and I should have switch jobs long ago but this insecurity that I won't be able to qualify for a different job is slowly killing me. All in all, I'll first look for a less physically strenuous job before resorting to suicide, maybe I'll be able to find something. I'd rather flip burgers or waiter tables, anything except picking up another 10kg box to fill up the same shelf for the 10,000th time. Just sick of it.
 
-nobodyknows-

-nobodyknows-

Mage
Jun 16, 2024
504
Yeah, but in my case they're pretty legit. I'm a really messed up person.
 

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