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BlackPoppet

BlackPoppet

Wise woman and Celtic sky person
Mar 7, 2020
991
I have a partner. I don't really have friends anymore because I don't trust people in the real world. A lot of people have let me down. I'm generally extroverted, now not so much.
I have been a bad judge of character before, now I'm more discerning. However because I'm mostly extrovert....It bothers me. Anyone else feel like this?
 
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Mr2005

Mr2005

Don't shoot the messenger, give me the gun
Sep 25, 2018
3,622
Right now I've never felt more alone.
 
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BlackPoppet

BlackPoppet

Wise woman and Celtic sky person
Mar 7, 2020
991
Right now I've never felt more alone.
:'( Me too! My extroverted side....75%.....is bothered that I am friendless, my introverted side .....25% is ok that I'm friendless. I've been forced to be introverted. My BPD makes me unable to keep friends I feel. My extroverted side let's me make friends very easily.
 
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Mr2005

Mr2005

Don't shoot the messenger, give me the gun
Sep 25, 2018
3,622
I see loneliness as the number one thing that links us. I try to get people to open up and I get shut down over and over.
 
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TheGoodGuy

TheGoodGuy

Visionary
Aug 27, 2018
2,999
Yes no friends, no GF and no hobbies/fun makes me go insane.
 
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Mr2005

Mr2005

Don't shoot the messenger, give me the gun
Sep 25, 2018
3,622
I actually have a girlfriend and instead of being with her I'm sat here talking about sex in a place where it's a dirty word and suicide isn't.
 
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Woodnote

Woodnote

Goodbye
Oct 23, 2019
277
Yes. I'm extremely lonely..
 
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BlackPoppet

BlackPoppet

Wise woman and Celtic sky person
Mar 7, 2020
991
I see loneliness as the number one thing that links us. I try to get people to open up and I get shut down over and over.
I'm good at getting people to open up....It's just I invest too much of myself into people. That's my BPD coming into play. I think that people can be self centered and self indulged. It's not you that's the problem. Society is more narcissistic than ever before.
social media has made people into literal avatars.
Yes. I'm extremely lonely..
well I'm here if ever you need a chat. :hug:
I actually have a girlfriend and instead of being with her I'm sat here talking about sex in a place where it's a dirty word and suicide isn't.
:hug:
 
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A

AlmondButterSmoothie

Member
Jan 15, 2020
8
I have a partner. I don't really have friends anymore because I don't trust people in the real world. A lot of people have let me down. I'm generally extroverted, now not so much.
I have been a bad judge of character before, now I'm more discerning. However because I'm mostly extrovert....It bothers me. Anyone else feel like this?

There are lots of people in my life, however, it feels like no one understands me. That's what makes me feel the most loneliest and disconnected from society. No amount of money could pay to buy or find someone who could emotionally satisfy me within reason.
 
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BlackPoppet

BlackPoppet

Wise woman and Celtic sky person
Mar 7, 2020
991
There are lots of people in my life, however, it feels like no one understands me. That's what makes me feel the most loneliest and disconnected from society. No amount of money could pay to buy or find someone who could emotionally satisfy me within reason.
Yes I know exactly where you are coming from. I felt the same way when I had more people around me. It's the worst.
 
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Mistake of Nature

Mistake of Nature

A shadow suspended on dust
Mar 30, 2020
159
I am very alone. I have no friends, no partner. There's something wrong with me -- I don't know how to connect with others and no one likes me. It hurts. The loneliness eats away at me every day. Didn't mean to get so melodramatic, but that's what I'm feeling right now.
 
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Marktheghost

Marktheghost

Paragon
Feb 20, 2020
911
I haven't had any friends since about 2003, and I've never had a good friend or a close friend.
 
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BlackPoppet

BlackPoppet

Wise woman and Celtic sky person
Mar 7, 2020
991
I am very alone. I have no friends, no partner. There's something wrong with me -- I don't know how to connect with others and no one likes me. It hurts. The loneliness eats away at me every day. Didn't mean to get so melodramatic, but that's what I'm feeling right now.
I don't think you are being melodramatic. You have a right to say what you are feeling. :hug:
 
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BitterlyAlive

BitterlyAlive

---
Apr 8, 2020
1,635
I feel very lonely and detached. For months, before the quarantine, I've been feeling like my friends and family are literal strangers. It feels like my memories didn't happen to me, which makes me feel more isolated.

I don't know what to do.
I feel very lonely and detached. For months, before the quarantine, I've been feeling like my friends and family are literal strangers. It feels like my memories didn't happen to me, which makes me feel more isolated.

I don't know what to do.
 
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RileyTanaka

RileyTanaka

ill / failure
Mar 20, 2020
264
I have a partner. I don't really have friends anymore because I don't trust people in the real world. A lot of people have let me down. I'm generally extroverted, now not so much.
I have been a bad judge of character before, now I'm more discerning. However because I'm mostly extrovert....It bothers me. Anyone else feel like this?
Yes, I know what you mean. It's not nice to say but I'm essentially a misanthrope. I know that while people can choose to be good but at theend of the day, people think about themselves. I'm sure there are exceptions to the rule, but it's safe to assume that most people will throw you away or dispose of you if you can't offer them something that benefits their life. It's why I don't really bother anymore with making new friends because I know 99% of relationships are temporary.
 
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BlackPoppet

BlackPoppet

Wise woman and Celtic sky person
Mar 7, 2020
991
Yes, I know what you mean. It's not nice to say but I'm essentially a misanthrope. I know that while people can choose to be good but at theend of the day, people think about themselves. I'm sure there are exceptions to the rule, but it's safe to assume that most people will throw you away or dispose of you if you can't offer them something that benefits their life. It's why I don't really bother anymore with making new friends because I know 99% of relationships are temporary.
I consider myself a part time misanthrope! I love people, but I'm aware of how shitty they can be. I use discernment a lot now. There are days when I cannot stand other people, and days where I'm more receptive. A lot of people are arseholes and I try to think of the good, beautiful people. Those are the people that I want to be around. However overt narcissistic people can piss off in my opinion. Lol! I try not to tar everyone with the same brush. I do know my enemy though! The Truine brain that we have. Lots of people are only using the reptilian portion of their brain. Especially at the moment with this epidemic going around, when people are deprived of things. Then we will see the real feral side of human nature.
@Riley Tanaka Forgot to add, if you ever need to chat... feel free to PM me! :hug:
 
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selfhater

selfhater

Experienced
Mar 1, 2020
222
i'm introverted and too insecure to be with ppl and have friends also i have anxiety/social anxiety, trust issues, idk but i'm always busy suffering and thinking how to end it so i don't have time to think about me being extremely isolated but it gets me sometimes when i see ppl hanging out with their friends and having fun and then me here
 
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I

I’mDone

Experienced
Mar 22, 2020
261
On the surface of it, I have people in my life. I'm married. I have a child. Siblings, mother, friends.

But I feel completely and utterly alone. I hear their words when they say they love me, but I feel nothing. I don't feel loved or wanted. I'm useful to people but when they don't need anything from me I don't hear from them.

Logically I know that that is normal behaviour. People have their own lives to lead. But logic does not banish the aching hollowness inside.

I've put off ctb so far for one reason only. I want to sell my flat, discard all the rubbish, pay off everything. My pathological need to be liked is so strong that I'm extending my own pain so that after my passing nobody complains about me, that I left a mess for them to sort out.

That level of desperation to be liked means I'm always lonely. Dying inside whilst keeping up a facade.

Loneliness kills. It's what will end my existence.
 
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Notwinnernotawin

Notwinnernotawin

Specialist
Apr 4, 2020
341
I have pushed my friends aside because I don't know if I can trust them. Loneliness is sad and sometimes almost unbearable, but I'd rather be on my own than in company of fake people.
 
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coreofanapple

coreofanapple

I am un chien andalusia
Mar 31, 2020
43
I only have a few friends; half the time I hate them and half the time I feel inferior to them. I live with my family but I'm such a wreck they're just waiting around for the day I die or leave. I'm distanced so far from all of them when I'm so close. I feel lonely in that I have no one to be my true self around. I'm always filtering myself.
 
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Throwawaysoul

Throwawaysoul

Wizard
May 14, 2018
606
I have no friends and no family besides a kid that hates me. I haven't had these things in so long, I'm not even sure how to behave around people with friends and family. I'm over 40, I doubt I'm making friends at this point. Feels bad.
 
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MsMaudlin

MsMaudlin

This is the fierce last stand of all I am
Dec 8, 2019
875
I'm so very lonely, I have chosen to not have a relationship until my kids are grown up.

But I would love someone to cuddle up to occasionally
 
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BlackPoppet

BlackPoppet

Wise woman and Celtic sky person
Mar 7, 2020
991
I have pushed my friends aside because I don't know if I can trust them. Loneliness is sad and sometimes almost unbearable, but I'd rather be on my own than in company of fake people.
Of course! So would I! I used to hang around with some not so great people. They were no good. I eventually learned to respect my self a lot more. That's why I keep myself to myself more now.
 
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StillWaiting

StillWaiting

Need cats to comfort me
Jul 28, 2018
550
Don't have anyone I can turn to whenever I need help.
Sometimes I do really think I am slowly going insane.
 
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BlackPoppet

BlackPoppet

Wise woman and Celtic sky person
Mar 7, 2020
991
Don't have anyone I can turn to whenever I need help.
Sometimes I do really think I am slowly going insane.
Well my PM is always open if you need to chat.
I have no friends and no family besides a kid that hates me. I haven't had these things in so long, I'm not even sure how to behave around people with friends and family. I'm over 40, I doubt I'm making friends at this point. Feels bad.
I'm 42 and I feel as though this is it for me. I empathise.
 
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StillWaiting

StillWaiting

Need cats to comfort me
Jul 28, 2018
550
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BlackPoppet

BlackPoppet

Wise woman and Celtic sky person
Mar 7, 2020
991
I only have a few friends; half the time I hate them and half the time I feel inferior to them. I live with my family but I'm such a wreck they're just waiting around for the day I die or leave. I'm distanced so far from all of them when I'm so close. I feel lonely in that I have no one to be my true self around. I'm always filtering myself.
You should never feel as though you have to filter your self.
On the surface of it, I have people in my life. I'm married. I have a child. Siblings, mother, friends.

But I feel completely and utterly alone. I hear their words when they say they love me, but I feel nothing. I don't feel loved or wanted. I'm useful to people but when they don't need anything from me I don't hear from them.

Logically I know that that is normal behaviour. People have their own lives to lead. But logic does not banish the aching hollowness inside.

I've put off ctb so far for one reason only. I want to sell my flat, discard all the rubbish, pay off everything. My pathological need to be liked is so strong that I'm extending my own pain so that after my passing nobody complains about me, that I left a mess for them to sort out.

That level of desperation to be liked means I'm always lonely. Dying inside whilst keeping up a facade.

Loneliness kills. It's what will end my existence.
Humans are social animals. We are pack animals.... we need other Human company. Nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with you. I feel the same. I don't really feel that my family love me either.
 
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D

Deleted member 14573

.
Feb 2, 2020
227
Hey BlackPoppet,

You sound like a lovely and friendly person who has been hurt by people in the past. Perhaps you trusted them and they ended up betraying that trust. I completely understand the need to be cautious with people as a result. I think that this is a good thing, but I'm sorry this bothers you.

I do not feel lonely as I am lucky to have good friends that I can usually call and hangout with. But I hate being alone. I was not like this last year (before the tragedies occurred in my life). I am not proud of this but I feel that I always need people with me. I am also extroverted but I was not like this. It is something that I need to work through, and go back to finding peace and satisfaction with my own company.
There are lots of people in my life, however, it feels like no one understands me. That's what makes me feel the most loneliest and disconnected from society. No amount of money could pay to buy or find someone who could emotionally satisfy me within reason.
I'm terribly sorry you feel misunderstood. Of course your feelings of loneliness are completely understandable. If I may ask, what would make you feel emotionally satisfied in that regard?
I am very alone. I have no friends, no partner. There's something wrong with me -- I don't know how to connect with others and no one likes me. It hurts. The loneliness eats away at me every day. Didn't mean to get so melodramatic, but that's what I'm feeling right now.
I'm sorry the loneliness feels this terrible. Hugs :hug: . Remember there is NOTHING wrong with you (unless you hurt people but I am sure you don't). I am not sure what your situation is but it might be social anxiety that makes it difficult? I am sure people do not dislike you, but it is easy to feel that way when there is nobody by our side <3 I do hope you find a partner and friends that you can bond with (they are out there!).
 
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