Does it become more bearable?

[hamvil]

I am 44 trapped in a shitty life, job is a total pain, i have a terrible boss, no friends or hobbies and no kids. I have a lovely wifi that take care of me as a chiold and I could not live without her. I tried so many time to push her away but she is still here. My question is: does get better when you reach 50 when the hope of haveing a kid are totally gone when you have already spend more that 10 or 15 years at your hitty job do you become so numb to all this that even the depression i am in becomes relative and life more berable. This is clearly a question for the people in the forum that are over 50 or over 60 or more in general but I do not mind the standpoint of younger ones.

 

[vipatherappa]

As a young person I can only speak from the experience of someone who is currently recovering from mental health issues with the help of loved ones. I'm not sure if you've sought out professional support for your issues, but if you think you might have depression you might want to try to access mental health services in your country. I don't know how well provided the public/private health system is where you live though.

But one thing I can definitely say is that you should talk to your wife about your issues(maybe you have already). From your description it seems like she is an extremely loyal and caring person who loves you, and spending quality time with her might help you cope with your circumstances. If you feel like every day has become the same due to your routine and your low mood, maybe you could start talking to her about new activities you can do together, new hobbies to pursue together, new places you can visit together, or just talk and reminisce about the life you've spent with each other. What people always say to depressed folks is 'count your blessings,' but it's hard to do that without actually experiencing and understanding what your blessings bring you and mean to you. Spending time with my parents and realising together what our connection means to us is one of the main things that is helping me in my recovery. You and I, we're really lucky to have people who love us and care about us enough to help us get through the bullshit we're facing in life.

 

[hamvil]

As a young person I can only speak from the experience of someone who is currently recovering from mental health issues with the help of loved ones. I'm not sure if you've sought out professional support for your issues, but if you think you might have depression you might want to try to access mental health services in your country. I don't know how well provided the public/private health system is where you live though.

Yes, I have sought professional help and got the diagnosis of depression and bipolar. I have also a therapist.

But one thing I can definitely say is that you should talk to your wife about your issues(maybe you have already). From your description it seems like she is an extremely loyal and caring person who loves you, and spending quality time with her might help you cope with your circumstances. If you feel like every day has become the same due to your routine and your low mood, maybe you could start talking to her about new activities you can do together, new hobbies to pursue together, new places you can visit together, or just talk and reminisce about the life you've spent with each other. What people always say to depressed folks is 'count your blessings,' but it's hard to do that without actually experiencing and understanding what your blessings bring you and mean to you. Spending time with my parents and realising together what our connection means to us is one of the main things that is helping me in my recovery. You and I, we're really lucky to have people who love us and care about us enough to help us get through the bullshit we're facing in life.

Yes, my wife is very loving and caring despite all the bad behavior I aimed at her (nothing physical only verbal) when I was not feeling well. I feel too down to try new things together, we talk often about the present past, and future. I like hearing her voice even if was she says is usually repetitive (I do not mind that, actually I like it because I have poor memory and most of the time probably forgot that she already told me something).

Yes, having such a person is good but I was defined by my job, when I lost my dream job I could not really cope and the current one is just a joke. The previous one gave me an international life, the possibility to express creativity, and manage people. Now I am in office hours on SaSu.

 

[Kundalini Guy]

It's definitely possible. I have seen people recover from much worse situations, you can do it also.

 

[Dangerdonkey333]

Recovery can never come too late or too early. I'm only 30 myself, but have had plenty of ups and downs, and have seen a lot of ups and downs in friends and family. The best thing we can do is be there for each other. It sounds like your wife is doing a great job. And you are too, for sticking in there for so long. Proud of you.