Don’t want to see 2025

[butimbleeding]

Anybody else trying to catch the bus before the New Year?

Due to the Canada postal strike it doesn't look like I'll be able to receive SN anytime soon, so I think I've come to the conclusion that hanging will be my method. Not as peaceful it seems, but a lot cheaper. And simpler, I'm too tired from life to source all the meds for SN protocol.

I just hope we get some snow here in December. I would like to wander into the woods at night during a fresh snowfall to find a tree to commit the act. Even though hanging might be very painful, at least the scene would be kind of serene and peaceful. I used to write music, maybe I could do one final song about it to leave the world with something before I go.

Thanks for reading my thoughts. It feels like I'm bleeding out every day until there's nothing left of me.

If anyone else is struggling with nervousness/anxiety/SI when it comes to hanging, I'd be glad to chat in the PMs. I vent on the forum every now and then but it might be nice to talk to someone going through the same mental battles. Wishing you all a nice evening.

 

[TheHolySword]

I don't want to see the new year honestly but due to personal reasons I want to wait until at least May of next year. It will at least give me time to prepare for the SN method and let me write out all my letters and maybe see some things before I ctb. I hope you're able to see the snow and I hope that it's beautiful. I'm wishing you the best, I hope you find what you're looking for and I hope that it's peaceful.

 

[pariah80]

Anybody else trying to catch the bus before the New Year?

Due to the Canada postal strike it doesn't look like I'll be able to receive SN anytime soon, so I think I've come to the conclusion that hanging will be my method. Not as peaceful it seems, but a lot cheaper. And simpler, I'm too tired from life to source all the meds for SN protocol.

I just hope we get some snow here in December. I would like to wander into the woods at night during a fresh snowfall to find a tree to commit the act. Even though hanging might be very painful, at least the scene would be kind of serene and peaceful. I used to write music, maybe I could do one final song about it to leave the world with something before I go.

Thanks for reading my thoughts. It feels like I'm bleeding out every day until there's nothing left of me.

If anyone else is struggling with nervousness/anxiety/SI when it comes to hanging, I'd be glad to chat in the PMs. I vent on the forum every now and then but it might be nice to talk to someone going through the same mental battles. Wishing you all a nice evening.

I share this sentiment. I live in the U.S. I'm not trying to see 2025 and beyond. I can't see how anyone can see what's coming and have any sort of hope or optimism. This society is going to shit. Sure, it's good to see capitalism fall. However, I don't want to be a part of the process of this downfall. I laugh when I hear people tell others, as a talking point for not catching the bus, to stick around and see what happens. That's such a terrible coping reason. It's so stupid.

No, I won't see 2025. To those sticking it out, I wish them luck.

 

[cloudyskye]

Anybody else trying to catch the bus before the New Year?

Due to the Canada postal strike it doesn't look like I'll be able to receive SN anytime soon, so I think I've come to the conclusion that hanging will be my method. Not as peaceful it seems, but a lot cheaper. And simpler, I'm too tired from life to source all the meds for SN protocol.

I just hope we get some snow here in December. I would like to wander into the woods at night during a fresh snowfall to find a tree to commit the act. Even though hanging might be very painful, at least the scene would be kind of serene and peaceful. I used to write music, maybe I could do one final song about it to leave the world with something before I go.

Thanks for reading my thoughts. It feels like I'm bleeding out every day until there's nothing left of me.

If anyone else is struggling with nervousness/anxiety/SI when it comes to hanging, I'd be glad to chat in the PMs. I vent on the forum every now and then but it might be nice to talk to someone going through the same mental battles. Wishing you all a nice evening.

If you're in Canada have you researched hypothermia? It might be less painful I don't know. I do know every year in the northern U.S. there are stories of homeless, people getting drunk etc... and accidentally dying from it. I hope you can find peace.

 

[butimbleeding]

I don't want to see the new year honestly but due to personal reasons I want to wait until at least May of next year. It will at least give me time to prepare for the SN method and let me write out all my letters and maybe see some things before I ctb. I hope you're able to see the snow and I hope that it's beautiful. I'm wishing you the best, I hope you find what you're looking for and I hope that it's peaceful.

Thank you so much for your kind words. I hope it's beautiful too because this bipolar depression has sucked all the joy/feeling out of my life…would be nice to have one last semblance of contentedness.

I understand your reasons for wanting to wait and I wish you the best and also hope you find what you're looking for.

If you're in Canada have you researched hypothermia? It might be less painful I don't know. I do know every year in the northern U.S. there are stories of homeless, people getting drunk etc... and accidentally dying from it. I hope you can find peace.

I'm familiar with hypothermia but I've never heard of it used as a suicide method! I don't know if I could pull it off… I think it's pretty painful and truthfully I hate being cold. I never do well in the wintertime, I only like the glimmer of fresh snow but that's about it

 

[Dyingsoon]

I would definitely not want to see another year of this dreaded pathetic existence of mine. I've been tortured more than enough and endured much more than I should have. 4 years of total torture should be it.

 

[L'absent]

Beautiful in the woods with snow. I love that atmosphere.

 

[ChaosArashi]

I agree. I live in NY, work in a prison (seriously not figuratively), my car was just repod Mon. I just hate it here (life). I'm 53. From abuse to DV, I'm a mess…ptsd, ocd, adhd, depression, anxiety. Not to mention the physical issues w dislocated vertebrae in my spine, arthritis & bone spurs in my spine, constant pain. I'm even considering blowing my house up w me in it. Just defeated n sick of this suffering. It never gets better.

 

[rozeske]

I really was hoping I'll be out before the new year too, but with the way things are going for me looks like I'll be stuck longer. I can't go back to the hanging method no matter how cheap, not after spending all this time looking in to sn and ways to get the money. I really really hope I won't have to hang.

 

[ScaredOfMachines]

My goal is to catch the bus before New Years as well. The only reason I've been able to stick around for so long was that I still had some hope for the future, but all of that is gone now. Hopefully I get my SN soon and I can put an end to all of this.

 

[FuneralCry]

I also just wish to be gone from this existence, I hope you find freedom from the suffering, I wish you the best.

 

[excinephile]

Anybody else trying to catch the bus before the New Year?

Due to the Canada postal strike it doesn't look like I'll be able to receive SN anytime soon, so I think I've come to the conclusion that hanging will be my method. Not as peaceful it seems, but a lot cheaper. And simpler, I'm too tired from life to source all the meds for SN protocol.

I just hope we get some snow here in December. I would like to wander into the woods at night during a fresh snowfall to find a tree to commit the act. Even though hanging might be very painful, at least the scene would be kind of serene and peaceful. I used to write music, maybe I could do one final song about it to leave the world with something before I go.

Thanks for reading my thoughts. It feels like I'm bleeding out every day until there's nothing left of me.

If anyone else is struggling with nervousness/anxiety/SI when it comes to hanging, I'd be glad to chat in the PMs. I vent on the forum every now and then but it might be nice to talk to someone going through the same mental battles. Wishing you all a nice evening.

Make sure to pick a tree in advance. It can be really difficult to find a proper one as stupid as it may sound.

I feel the same. On 3rd December it will be one year of hell on earth for me and I'd rather not stick around to live through this anniversary but as it stands I doubt I will be able to pull it off.

 

[butimbleeding]

Make sure to pick a tree in advance. It can be really difficult to find a proper one as stupid as it may sound.

I feel the same. On 3rd December it will be one year of hell on earth for me and I'd rather not stick around to live through this anniversary but as it stands I doubt I will be able to pull it off.

Yeah good point, I'm planning on going out and marking one with a bit of spray paint or something so I don't forget it.

Whatever you do, I wish you the best and I hope you find freedom from hell on earth. I know what that feels like

 

[TAW122]

I said the same thing back in 2022, 2023, and sadly, in 2024, alas I'm still suffering in sentience. I feel the same way too, I don't want to see 2025, but sadly due to my living arrangements and personal circumstances, that would be a reality for me, having to see the following year. However, one big difference is that I've worked towards my own bus ticket and when my time and circumstance is right, then I will punch my bus ticket and get on the bus to oblivion, whether it is 2025 or some future time. I just need to make sure my bus ticket is valid and acceptable (method and successful with it) in order to board the bus.

 

[Tuonetar_]

Same here. I really don't think life has much else to offer me at this point--there are plenty of things I would still like to experience, sure, but at the same time there's so much evil in the world/my life that it honestly doesn't seem worth it to continue sticking around. My country is also in a socio-political situation that is going to get much, MUCH worse before it can get better, if it can get better.

If I said all that to anyone IRL, they'd tell me that I'm being insanely cynical, but I'm honestly not. I've lived a good life, all things considered. But I'm tired, I've seen enough, and I'm ready to go.

 

[PhDone]

Anybody else trying to catch the bus before the New Year?

Due to the Canada postal strike it doesn't look like I'll be able to receive SN anytime soon, so I think I've come to the conclusion that hanging will be my method. Not as peaceful it seems, but a lot cheaper. And simpler, I'm too tired from life to source all the meds for SN protocol.

I just hope we get some snow here in December. I would like to wander into the woods at night during a fresh snowfall to find a tree to commit the act. Even though hanging might be very painful, at least the scene would be kind of serene and peaceful. I used to write music, maybe I could do one final song about it to leave the world with something before I go.

Thanks for reading my thoughts. It feels like I'm bleeding out every day until there's nothing left of me.

If anyone else is struggling with nervousness/anxiety/SI when it comes to hanging, I'd be glad to chat in the PMs. I vent on the forum every now and then but it might be nice to talk to someone going through the same mental battles. Wishing you all a nice evening.

I hear you. I would like to go before 2025 too. Just gotta finish some writing and yes a song exactly like you proposed, I've been working on that. Maybe something for my funeral.

I have SN lined up but my first thoughts practically every morning is hanging. Get it done. But yes contemplating that seems far harder than SN. I think because of knowing what happens post unconsciousness. And also because it would take not backing out prior to unconsciousness. Once SN is downed its done. No turning back. Happy to dm if you have inclination. Thanks for the post and sharing where you're at. I truly hope for all our peace for the NY.

 

[foreverlanguish]

I don't want to make it to 2025 either, but a part of me feels like I'll have no choice. I'm still trying to figure out when and where I'll do my method, plus the thought of CTBing still scares me sometimes. It'll probably have to wait a while unfortunately.

 

[unknown_xav]

I am in the same boat, I think for me it's mostly just a survival instinct that lingers in my mind. And also the thought of loved ones that delays or stops me from simply taking a drink of SN everyday. Every night is a struggle to overcome the will to live, everynight is full of anxiety.

 

[Crash_Bash_Dash]

Same here. I really don't think life has much else to offer me at this point--there are plenty of things I would still like to experience, sure, but at the same time there's so much evil in the world/my life that it honestly doesn't seem worth it to continue sticking around. My country is also in a socio-political situation that is going to get much, MUCH worse before it can get better, if it can get better.

If I said all that to anyone IRL, they'd tell me that I'm being insanely cynical, but I'm honestly not. I've lived a good life, all things considered. But I'm tired, I've seen enough, and I'm ready to go.

I feel exactly as you. I would have loved to experience certain things in life before I die but nowadays I think they're unachievable to me because of my current situation/condition. I also dread my personal life and today's world. I don't know how much longer can I take this pain of mine...

 

[Yume Nikki]

It depends... I want to stick around a bit longer for the sake of my family, but I think my time here is done and I don't want to suffer anymore after my breakup, I've planned my death for years now and I think it's time for me to actually figure out how to go through with it instead of postponing.

 

[ThatRussianDude]

It is so ****ing sad that we all had to end up here.

 

[lawlietsph]

New years are always making me feel extra extra horrible. I want to die so bad but maybe I'll never get the courage to do anything... Everything hurts so much.

 

[opheliaoveragain]

id like to be gone. in US too and don't have any hope. trying to figure everything out.

much love to everyone xx

OP, I hope you get to see the snow. that sounds like a beautiful scene to go out in. wishing you peace no matter what. here if you wanna talk.

 

[bananaolympus]

I have a weird thing maybe ocd driven is that when a new year is coming i actually don't want to die until the new year arrive i found dying on christmas or new years very unsatisfied

 

[butimbleeding]

id like to be gone. in US too and don't have any hope. trying to figure everything out.

much love to everyone xx

OP, I hope you get to see the snow. that sounds like a beautiful scene to go out in. wishing you peace no matter what. here if you wanna talk.

thank you very much… we got snow but it warmed up and now it's all melting lol… wishing you peace and I'm here for you as well if you need someone.

It is so ****ing sad that we all had to end up here.

I couldn't agree more <\3