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thx for the advice
its my own fault/problem. hes an ex i dont want to see with someone else, im distancing myself so i dont have to
Potentially! It could distort and cloud your view of seeing things as they truly are. We all learn to love the lie!
Am I being selfish by only looking out for my own emotions? What if this isn't what's best for him?
I think it is reasonable if you are unable to connect with him in that capacity. I am going through something similar, and I tried for months to remain friends as usual, but the heartache became too much to handle. I can't bring myself to formally end the friendship, but I've had to completely withdraw for mental health reasons. I haven't hung out with her in a couple of months, and we've barely even texted in that timeframe either. I've told her exactly what I'm feeling and going through for transparency. Maybe someday things will change, one of us will have a change of heart, and we can reconnect again, but for now I just can't do anything in the current circumstances. I understand your feelings of confusion and guilt and hope you will find some peace and clarity on it soon.
yeah theres a lot of times ive tried to call it off but just couldnt because i missed him too much. however this time feels more........official i guess. im not sure why it just does.
its not that it makes me uncomfortable. i actually really like talking to him and he helps me with my problems as much as he can. its just some day hes probably going to find another gf and im going to be emotionally hurt and feel cast aside, knowing this i figured it was best for me to leave now. also our friendship has only been for the past few years.
How do you do it? That is a super power I wish I had, lol. It makes sense intellectually, but my dumb lizard brain won't let me. Stupid feelings.
I don't know. My ex, who I'm best friends with, talks to me about going on dates, getting messaged on POF, and I'm happy for her. But when I do the same, she doesn't like it. That's fine, we're all different.How do you do it? That is a super power I wish I had, lol. It makes sense intellectually, but my dumb lizard brain won't let me. Stupid feelings.
Have you noticed any difference in feelings based on which side initiated the breakup or does it not matter?
I can only speak from the side of ending the relationship, but I don't think it would really matter to me. Sometimes you are better as friends or fwb's. There had to be something you really liked about somebody to go out with them. That doesn't change, even if the romantic relationship ends. Same thing with the physical part. Maybe you and the other person really like each other physically - you make each other feel good. That doesn't have to come with all the strings of a full relationship. But it definitely won't be nsa if you are exes with benefits. Each situation will be unique...
