leavingsoonx
Headed to the other side
- Sep 22, 2024
- 118
If anything I wish I used past bad times and actually did it. I wish when I was 16, I knew what to do. Instead of being mourned I will only be laughed at. No one cares about me anymore, I have 0 friends, and I can't date. I don't care about the college programs because I will fail if I ever went.
Since I've been suicidal there are times I thought I am glad I haven't killed myself. But in reality, I would trade the past 10 years of my life to have just found this forum then. Get the right method. I would trade every happy moment to have killed myself years ago. It's not worth being alive in a world where I'm only bullied and no one actually cares for my feelings.
I am reminded everyday that I'm just a sorry excuse for a person and that I went psychotic on a person I don't even love anymore. That although I finally stopped, everyone I knew who hurt me just travels and enjoy their lives. Maybe before I CTB I'll creep them all to ensure I die. I can't handle even looking at anyone's lives. They all win at life and win at everything, they can do whatever they want and there are no consequences.
I only regret being alive still. I won't screw up my future opportunity, the last few failed attempts I didn't even say what was happening or ask for help. I accepted dying and wasn't that scared - I knew it had to end.
There's no point in being here. I know my SN will come by about 2025 because of what's going on in my country. Once I get it, I finally can quit the game where "I'm public enemy number one." I will be free from having everything taken away from me.
They won't be able to catch me when I'm gone. They will all still laugh at me. But I'll be gone.
Since I've been suicidal there are times I thought I am glad I haven't killed myself. But in reality, I would trade the past 10 years of my life to have just found this forum then. Get the right method. I would trade every happy moment to have killed myself years ago. It's not worth being alive in a world where I'm only bullied and no one actually cares for my feelings.
I am reminded everyday that I'm just a sorry excuse for a person and that I went psychotic on a person I don't even love anymore. That although I finally stopped, everyone I knew who hurt me just travels and enjoy their lives. Maybe before I CTB I'll creep them all to ensure I die. I can't handle even looking at anyone's lives. They all win at life and win at everything, they can do whatever they want and there are no consequences.
I only regret being alive still. I won't screw up my future opportunity, the last few failed attempts I didn't even say what was happening or ask for help. I accepted dying and wasn't that scared - I knew it had to end.
There's no point in being here. I know my SN will come by about 2025 because of what's going on in my country. Once I get it, I finally can quit the game where "I'm public enemy number one." I will be free from having everything taken away from me.
They won't be able to catch me when I'm gone. They will all still laugh at me. But I'll be gone.
