Experiencing social rejection so young contributes a lot to me being suicidal in adulthood

[FireFox]

I am 27 and growing up I didn't know where I really belonged this is why I feel life isn't for me. My parents are Immigrants ( African culture) and I was born here in the UK. Growing up with family from different culture whatever problems I had as teenager growing up in the UK my family couldn't relete nor knew how to deal with it . For example my family couldn't understand why it was a massive deal for me to fit in at school because in African culture school education is highly valued in families and going to school to learn is regarded as a privilege since many kids cant afford it.

Whenever I visited my parents home country I always feel like an outsider because I have nothing in common with my relatives as a result of growing up in the UK and living western culture. The popular home dishes my relatives love I don't like the same goes with the music, the gossip culture and deeply social Conservative country my parents country is. I am very respectful open minded about other people's beliefs but at heart I am free spirited liberal and feminist. My relatives always just see me as some kid who lives in the UK with no real interest in wanting to know me it shows in their behaviour. My relatives gossiping and laughing about my mental problems when I was a teenager also made showed me at a young age that everyone sees me as the freak of the family.

At school I struggled to fit in, was regularly builled and didn't have a strong friendship group the other kids at school had. The main friends I did have a school said mean things about me when I was not around and I had to find out from the someone else. These friends at times excluded me from the group and even allowed a new girl to push me out of the group. Throughout year 7 to sixth-form I went through many periods of hanging different people to having no friends at all. A lot of the time I was lonely at school and never really had friends.

I experienced being abandoned by friends once they had bfs or their love life becoming their new life because it was like everyone else was growing up except me and my friends saw me as someone they didn't need anymore. I experienced this both in secondary school and university.When I was at my last university I befriended with a woman in my law class. During first year we were really close and we talked regularly then second year came all she kept talking about was this man she has been messaging and had a crush on. At times I felt left out of the group because my friend and another classmate would talk about the men in their lives while I was more interested in my law degree course.

The same friend when it came to final year ended up lashing out at me when I experienced some concerns about the relationship she had with the man she liked. I had some suspicions the man was married. I was a different person at 21 and used to think age gap relationships were creepy.

The man was in 40s and had a professional job as a cardiologist while my friend was just an unemployed university student in her 20s. I questioned why a man in such a professional job is not with a woman his own age and with a succesful career. It was even more creepy because the man was a family friend my friend knew all her life.

She got so mad at me for asking "are you sure he is not married?" I later learnt the man she liked was a family friend in his 40s which she knew all her life. She said to me " I have known him all my life, my family would never lie to me "
She got so fucking defensive it was so disturbing she acted as if I murdered someone. She looked down upon me for being single and mocked me for it.

A lot of social exclusion I have experienced throughout my life along with being rejected by men and things never working out constantly made me feel life just isn't for me and I don't belong here in this world. Why was I born so different and unable to fit in anywhere.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

She got so mad at me for asking "are you sure he is not married?" I later learnt the man she liked was a family friend in his 40s which she knew all her life. She said to me " I have known him all my life, my family would never lie to me "
She got so fucking defensive it was so disturbing she acted as if I murdered someone. She looked down upon me for being single and mocked me for it.

Sounds like she was being groomed and she probably lashed out at you partly due to this. I wouldn't get too hung up over it. Hopefully, she isn't seeing anymore.

As for the other stuff, have you tried maybe looking into any communities where you could interact with other children of immigrants, especially those who happen to have African parents? Maybe they'll be able to relate to you better.

 

[alienfreak]

I didnt have the cultural/immigration aspect but suffered much of the same social issues. Never could make real friends. A life characterised by isolation, exclusion, distance, rejection. Deep in my soul I still remember the feeling of walking around school during break times having no friend group, walking around aimlessly trying to kill time. My mind was mutilated by the public school system and the artificially created social situations it imposed on me

 

[FireFox]

Sounds like she was being groomed and she probably lashed out at you partly due to this. I wouldn't get too hung up over it. Hopefully, she isn't seeing anymore.

As for the other stuff, have you tried maybe looking into any communities where you could interact with other children of immigrants, especially those who happen to have African parents? Maybe they'll be able to relate to you better.

@EvisceratedJester At time she lashed out on me I was beginning to experience my suicidal thoughts. During my final year of university when I told her I was suicidal and she judged me for it and later on began to avoid me at university and even got others in the class to do the same.

I graduated university on time whereas she didn't. She didn't graduate because she failed an assignment during spring and had to resit the assignment during the summer which meant she missed the summer graduation . The university takes time to mark and grade assignments.

She knew I was suicidal and struggling throughout the year but she never cared and never checked up on me. It was so hard because I always there for her as a friend and looked out for her.

Rescently I found an online community for people to share their struggles of having African parents and it has been helpful.

I just found the relationship she had with the man so bizzare. The man was not British and didn't really live in the same city as my friend which was why she didn't meet the man regularly in person and talked to him via social media a lot. My friend and the man were both Congolese.

A family friend should know better than to be messaging their friends kids. This is what puzzled me a lot.

When I told my grandmother she believed I was right to have concerns and believed the man was married too.

My grandmother explained that African men ( NOT ALL) do have have wives and children back home and use women living in the UK or Western for purposes of getting stay in the UK and the families of these men play a role in assisting in this visa scamming. My grandmother and mother know women in their community this has happened too.

I didnt have the cultural/immigration aspect but suffered much of the same social issues. Never could make real friends. A life characterised by isolation, exclusion, distance, rejection. Deep in my soul I still remember the feeling of walking around school during break times having no friend group, walking around aimlessly trying to kill time. My mind was mutilated by the public school system and the artificially created social situations it imposed on me

@alienfreak virtual hug sorry you went through that. It is so shocking how secondary school/ high school gets romantised by older people and the media. Older people think I am crazy when i say I don't miss secondary school.

Not everyone had the time of their lives in school. The problem with society is of you don't fit in with the crowd people will exclude you or male your life hell but most people in society don't understand how it feels to struggle to fit in with the crowd. This behaviour starts at a young age enabled by parents and adults in authority.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

@EvisceratedJester At time she lashed out on me I was beginning to experience my suicidal thoughts. During my final year of university when I told her I was suicidal and she judged me for it and later on began to avoid me at university and even got others in the class to do the same.

I graduated university on time whereas she didn't. She didn't graduate because she failed an assignment during spring and had to resit the assignment during the summer which meant she missed the summer graduation . The university takes time to mark and grade assignments.

She knew I was suicidal and struggling throughout the year but she never cared and never checked up on me. It was so hard because I always there for her as a friend and looked out for her.

Rescently I found an online community for people to share their struggles of having African parents and it has been helpful.

I just found the relationship she had with the man so bizzare. The man was not British and didn't really live in the same city as my friend which was why she didn't meet the man regularly in person and talked to him via social media a lot. My friend and the man were both Congolese.

When I told my grandmother she believed I was right to have concerns and believed the man was married too.

My grandmother explained that African men ( NOT ALL) do have have wives and children back home and use women living in the UK or Western for purposes of getting stay in the UK and the families of these men play a role in assisting in this visa scamming. My grandmother and mother know women in their community this has happened too.

Oh yeah, I know about the whole thing where they use western women. My aunt had actually fallen for that despite my mom warning her. She even travelled down to his country to visit him, which ended in her instead spending most of her time with his cousin or something who was trying to distract her.

Also, sorry about the fact that she was a total asshole towards you.

 

[FireFox]

Oh yeah, I know about the whole thing where they use western women. My aunt had actually fallen for that despite my mom warning her. She even travelled down to his country to visit him, which ended in her instead spending most of her time with his cousin or something who was trying to distract her.

Also, sorry about the fact that she was a total asshole towards you.

I genuinely thought I really did something wrong for having suspicions about the man and raising my concerns with my friend. I felt so guilty for it. At the time we were both 21 year old university students.

Only years later I realised that it was wrong for a fully grown family friend to messaging their friends kids and being involved with them in that way. I also realied my friends family were not good parents knowing their friend was messaging their daughter like this and allowed to happen .

 

[Leiot]

At school I struggled to fit in, was regularly builled and didn't have a strong friendship group the other kids at school had. The main friends I did have a school said mean things about me when I was not around and I had to find out from the someone else. These friends at times excluded me from the group and even allowed a new girl to push me out of the group. Throughout year 7 to sixth-form I went through many periods of hanging different people to having no friends at all. A lot of the time I was lonely at school and never really had friends.

I don't know about other people but I never seemed to fit in. I was one of those 'smart' kids that was excluded from the group the popular people were in. They weren't mean or anything, I just wasn't invited in. I've always felt like I belonged somewhere else.

Kids in high school can be just horrible to each other. You'd think learning to function in society wouldn't bring out the worst in people but it does. And they tend to be the loudest ones. The people who accept you are usually the quiet ones.

I thought being in the UK they'd be past that sort of discrimination but I guess not. Sorry, I hope it gets better.

 

[FireFox]

I don't know about other people but I never seemed to fit in. I was one of those 'smart' kids that was excluded from the group the popular people were in. They weren't mean or anything, I just wasn't invited in. I've always felt like I belonged somewhere else.

Kids in high school can be just horrible to each other. You'd think learning to function in society wouldn't bring out the worst in people but it does. And they tend to be the loudest ones. The people who accept you are usually the quiet ones.

I thought being in the UK they'd be past that sort of discrimination but I guess not. Sorry, I hope it gets better.

@Leiot When I was child I had a close group of friends who went to the same primary school as me. During the weekends I went to their houses and I was invited to their birthday parties. I really enjoyed my childhood. My problems began in secondary school

When I went to secondary school my friends from primary school went to different secondary schools in the area except for one friend. When I was in primary school I was really close to this friend. I went to her house on the weekends, she used to invite me to parties and we hung out regularly in school but she changed when we went to secondary school.

In the 1st term of Yr7 she got a boyfriend and new friends and stopped hanging out with me. She stopped inviting me to her house and her parties which hurt because we lived in the same neighbourhood.

Losing her was difficult because I was regularly builled in school, struggled to fit in and I really needed a friend. She knew all this.

She then began to behave like just the kids who were bullying me. One day at school before class we were all queuing and wanting for the teacher to call us. The area we were queuing in had both the boys and girls toilets. The door to the boys toilets was open and my friend pushed me in as a joke .

When i tried to leave the boys toliets all the other kids then joined in preventing me from leaving by pushing me back in the boys toilets room. The teacher came and I managed to leave.

My mum was mad at me for not telling the teacher but I didn't want to tell on my friend.

I made another friend in school but she changed when got a makeover which made her really pretty and noticed at school. She became not nice towards me. The next group of friends I had excluded me at times from the group and said mean things behind my back.

In secondary school I went through many periods not having friends and just being by myself. It forced me to talk to other people in school and get to know people. In adulthood I had to do it again.

 

[Leiot]

@FireFox, I wish high school taught people how to be decent human beings instead of how to be popular.

 

[nattys5thtoenail]

People don't realize how much damage bullying does to someone mentally. It should be on the same level as PTSD from war, people literally shoot up schools because of this stuff and yet no one takes it as seriously as it should be.

I was bullied heavily for being socially mal adapted and I've never recovered from it, I know I should "get over it" but the scar is just so deep I can't trust myself and relationships are hard to maintain because I let my poor self esteem get in the way of it.

 

[FireFox]

@FireFox, I wish high school taught people how to be decent human beings instead of how to be popular.

@Leiot I blame the parents for the reason why bullying is a problem in schools .

When I was builled at school regularly my builles parents were ALL either clueless or complete arseholes. It's no suprise their piece of shit sons and daughters ended up terrorising me and the school population.

 

[FireFox]

People don't realize how much damage bullying does to someone mentally. It should be on the same level as PTSD from war, people literally shoot up schools because of this stuff and yet no one takes it as seriously as it should be.

I was bullied heavily for being socially mal adapted and I've never recovered from it, I know I should "get over it" but the scar is just so deep I can't trust myself and relationships are hard to maintain because I let my poor self esteem get in the way of it.

@nattys5thtoenail You deserved so much better. Bullying will only stop once when society starts punishing these people instead of rewarding them. Donald Trump has spent his entire life bullying his way through everything and ends up being a president.

Bullying is one of the number of reasons why teens and also young adults kill themselves.

 

[CogitoMori]

I can sort of relate. My family is military and we moved every 4 years of my life. I'm autistic and am still undiagnosed, but I had no clue about my condition when I was younger and struggled with severe bullying and communication issues (because people won't simply say what they mean and expect me to assume, but then also get mad when I assume). I lived with the hope that I would "find my people," as everyone says, as an adult, but now that the bullying and social isolation has continued into adulthood, I'm simply hopeless. I lived so long with the dream of finally being around people that make me feel safe and loved, but like every childhood dream, it's been shattered.

 

[nattys5thtoenail]

I can sort of relate. My family is military and we moved every 4 years of my life. I'm autistic and am still undiagnosed, but I had no clue about my condition when I was younger and struggled with severe bullying and communication issues (because people won't simply say what they mean and expect me to assume, but then also get mad when I assume). I lived with the hope that I would "find my people," as everyone says, as an adult, but now that the bullying and social isolation has continued into adulthood, I'm simply hopeless. I lived so long with the dream of finally being around people that make me feel safe and loved, but like every childhood dream, it's been shattered.

Start hanging around other autistic people and stop trying to get validation from neurotypicals unless it's for career purposes, think of life as a game. There are people we communicate with to move forward in life and people we are close with for our own happiness, I only have 2-3 "real" friends and the rest of them I just have around for social climbing.

 

[NikolaiK]

People don't realize how much damage bullying does to someone mentally. It should be on the same level as PTSD from war, people literally shoot up schools because of this stuff and yet no one takes it as seriously as it should be.

I was bullied heavily for being socially mal adapted and I've never recovered from it, I know I should "get over it" but the scar is just so deep I can't trust myself and relationships are hard to maintain because I let my poor self esteem get in the way of it.

yeah being outcasted is literally like a death sentence when you're a social animal that relies on others to survive. I understand why people act out violently when they have been made outcasts, if you're kicked out of society you have nothing.

 

[CogitoMori]

yeah being outcasted is literally like a death sentence when you're a social animal that relies on others to survive. I understand why people act out violently when they have been made outcasts, if you're kicked out of society you have nothing.

The child cast out by the village will burn it down to finally feel its warmth.

 

[nattys5thtoenail]

yeah being outcasted is literally like a death sentence when you're a social animal that relies on others to survive. I understand why people act out violently when they have been made outcasts, if you're kicked out of society you have nothing.

Yes although I don't support people who shoot up elementary schools or murder innocent people I understand why they're angry at the world :(

 

[FireFox]

yeah being outcasted is literally like a death sentence when you're a social animal that relies on others to survive. I understand why people act out violently when they have been made outcasts, if you're kicked out of society you have nothing.

@NikolaiK Whats worse when outcasts bully and terrorise other outcasts. I even experienced bullying from other kids who were outcasts of the school population or by society itself. Bullying is ulimately about power and control.

1) One of these outsider kids who builled me at times in school was a LGBT Eastern European boy. In my classes there was a LGBT creative boy who liked to draw and he didn't really have any male friends at school, his friends were mainly girls. He was an outsider in the school. The boys at school liked to play football, xbox, attending house parties and dating other girls in the school. At school there were people in the closet because the school I attended was not a place where LGBT relationships was encouraged.

This boy despite belonging to a marginalised group he was racist towards black people. He was rude to me and pretty much told me to kill myself.

One time in school when I came with my natural afro hair he was laughing at my hairstyle worst of he was next to one of my girl group of friends who was also laughing too.

2) I was bullied by kids who were in foster care

Yes although I don't support people who shoot up elementary schools or murder innocent people I understand why they're angry at the world :(

@nattys5thtoenail If my old secondary school in the UK was an American high school it would have gotten shot up.

The kids at the school I attended majority of them were just arseholes, i do not miss any of my classmates, I miss my teachers much more. The boys at school thought they were attractive, funny and better than everyone. The boys liked getting involved in other people's business and starting fights and arguments.

The boys constantly made unfunny jokes about people's appearances, skin colour, family income and just anything. The boys caused havoc in the school and teachers a lot of the time allowed them to get away with it.

The girls were just cliquey, gossiped about others and also participated in bullying others.

I grew up in the generation were twitter and Facebook was beginning to grow in popularity and most people in school had Facebook or Twitter. At school a lot of arguments were a result of things people said on social media about other kids in the school. This is why the school constantly made assemblies talking about how bad cyberbullying is and warning students what the consequences are of cyberbullying.

One girl I knew at school ended up having mental breakdown because she couldn't cope with the behaviour of the kids at school. She ended up moving schools.

School shootings are Wrong but kids take things way too far in how they bully and terrorise others. I don't understand you think with all these school shootings people in school would behave better and not do school bullying.

 

[FireFox]

I can sort of relate. My family is military and we moved every 4 years of my life. I'm autistic and am still undiagnosed, but I had no clue about my condition when I was younger and struggled with severe bullying and communication issues (because people won't simply say what they mean and expect me to assume, but then also get mad when I assume). I lived with the hope that I would "find my people," as everyone says, as an adult, but now that the bullying and social isolation has continued into adulthood, I'm simply hopeless. I lived so long with the dream of finally being around people that make me feel safe and loved, but like every childhood dream, it's been shattered.

@CogitoMori Virtual hug

I have tried to find my people too, believe me I have and guess what ? They also excluded me too.

I joined an online community and discord to connect with women like myself who has never had a boyfriend and being rejected by men is all I ever known throughout my life while other women get chosen. It was wonderful finally meeting a group women who actually understood what I have been going through my entire life. The community of women that I genuinely cared for and saw as friends cruelly drove me out of the community.

Everyday I always nice to all the women in on the discord server and helped them when they were having problems in their lives. I have use my past experiences to help others and I am very detailed, insightful but straight to the point in all my posts. I write a maximum of 3 paragraphs easy to read and clear advice. I always engaged with everyone but the moderator constantly picked me.

Last year I shared the struggleds I was having everyone on the server knew I was going through a difficult time. The moderator as usual was picking on me from day 1 for some reason she never seemed to like me. I only wrote 3 clear detailed paragraphs which went straight to the point.

She publicly criticised me for writing "novel long pages". She went on about her shitty workplace experience to publicly shame me for being upset about being fired from an unhealthy workplace and she kept cruelly shaming me even bringing old irrelevant posts.

The women who I always nice too sided with the moderator then they complained about my posts majority of the time they have been keeping quiet the entire time. They all pushed me out. It hurts losing a community of women who I finally connected with

 

[CogitoMori]

@CogitoMori Virtual hug

I have tried to find my people too, believe me I have and guess what ? They also excluded me too.

I joined an online community and discord to connect with women like myself who has never had a boyfriend and being rejected by men is all I ever known throughout my life while other women get chosen. It was wonderful finally meeting a group women who actually understood what I have been going through my entire life. The community of women that I genuinely cared for and saw as friends cruelly drove me out of the community.

Everyday I always nice to all the women in on the discord server and helped them when they were having problems in their lives. I have use my past experiences to help others and I am very detailed, insightful but straight to the point in all my posts. I write a maximum of 3 paragraphs easy to read and clear advice. I always engaged with everyone but the moderator constantly picked me.

Last year I shared the struggleds I was having everyone on the server knew I was going through a difficult time. The moderator as usual was picking on me from day 1 for some reason she never seemed to like me. I only wrote 3 clear detailed paragraphs which went straight to the point.

She publicly criticised me for writing "novel long pages". She went on about her shitty workplace experience to publicly shame me for being upset about being fired from an unhealthy workplace and she kept cruelly shaming me even bringing old irrelevant posts.

The women who I always nice too sided with the moderator then they complained about my posts majority of the time they have been keeping quiet the entire time. They all pushed me out. It hurts losing a community of women who I finally connected with

I had a similar experience with a trans discord group. I was driven out and called a "virus" for stating that covid-19 likely came from the virus factory down the street from the wet market, and that the CCP would cover up its release whether it was an accident or not because they'd look bad either way. I thought I was stating the obvious, but they said I was racist for saying that (because of the propaganda the CCP put out specifically to US liberals where they said anyone that said it came from the lab was racist) and ganged up on me. The one that said I was a virus was basically my trans mom and helped me pick my first masculine name.

 

[neonzebra]

I can't relate to the cultural differences side of it, but I can to social rejection in general and I agree it hinders development profoundly.

I came from a broken family and was raised by a very depressed and stressed single mother. She tried her best but I was a sensitive and miserable child from a young age and I was unable to mentally defend myself against bullies at school. I had "best friends" throughout primary and secondary school who enjoyed mentally torturing me. The few other friends I had were very shy and anxious like me and I believe we weren't truly friends but just forced together. I basically didn't develop social skills until my early 20s when I started working a real job.

In my 30s my social life has improved dramatically but I am still hindered by fear of rejection, the feeling of being an outsider, being attracted to abusive men and so on. I don't feel particularly close to anyone in my life currently and am so lonely since my mother died a few years ago. My work life is also stagnant and I'm still stuck with low paid and high stress work as my self esteem issues are a constant hindrance to self development.
I'm also always tired from stress which makes change almost impossible as it takes so much extra time and energy.

 

[ghost-shock]

I am 27 and growing up I didn't know where I really belonged this is why I feel life isn't for me. My parents are Immigrants ( African culture) and I was born here in the UK. Growing up with family from different culture whatever problems I had as teenager growing up in the UK my family couldn't relete nor knew how to deal with it . For example my family couldn't understand why it was a massive deal for me to fit in at school because in African culture school education is highly valued in families and going to school to learn is regarded as a privilege since many kids cant afford it.

Whenever I visited my parents home country I always feel like an outsider because I have nothing in common with my relatives as a result of growing up in the UK and living western culture. The popular home dishes my relatives love I don't like the same goes with the music, the gossip culture and deeply social Conservative country my parents country is. I am very respectful open minded about other people's beliefs but at heart I am free spirited liberal and feminist. My relatives always just see me as some kid who lives in the UK with no real interest in wanting to know me it shows in their behaviour. My relatives gossiping and laughing about my mental problems when I was a teenager also made showed me at a young age that everyone sees me as the freak of the family.

At school I struggled to fit in, was regularly builled and didn't have a strong friendship group the other kids at school had. The main friends I did have a school said mean things about me when I was not around and I had to find out from the someone else. These friends at times excluded me from the group and even allowed a new girl to push me out of the group. Throughout year 7 to sixth-form I went through many periods of hanging different people to having no friends at all. A lot of the time I was lonely at school and never really had friends.

I experienced being abandoned by friends once they had bfs or their love life becoming their new life because it was like everyone else was growing up except me and my friends saw me as someone they didn't need anymore. I experienced this both in secondary school and university.When I was at my last university I befriended with a woman in my law class. During first year we were really close and we talked regularly then second year came all she kept talking about was this man she has been messaging and had a crush on. At times I felt left out of the group because my friend and another classmate would talk about the men in their lives while I was more interested in my law degree course.

The same friend when it came to final year ended up lashing out at me when I experienced some concerns about the relationship she had with the man she liked. I had some suspicions the man was married. I was a different person at 21 and used to think age gap relationships were creepy.

The man was in 40s and had a professional job as a cardiologist while my friend was just an unemployed university student in her 20s. I questioned why a man in such a professional job is not with a woman his own age and with a succesful career. It was even more creepy because the man was a family friend my friend knew all her life.

She got so mad at me for asking "are you sure he is not married?" I later learnt the man she liked was a family friend in his 40s which she knew all her life. She said to me " I have known him all my life, my family would never lie to me "
She got so fucking defensive it was so disturbing she acted as if I murdered someone. She looked down upon me for being single and mocked me for it.

A lot of social exclusion I have experienced throughout my life along with being rejected by men and things never working out constantly made me feel life just isn't for me and I don't belong here in this world. Why was I born so different and unable to fit in anywhere.

i can relate to this so much except my parents were carribean and abusive af. Unfortunately abuse is very normalised in carribean culture. I also was bullied for my looks and couldnt make friends. I dont get guys either other only old men compliment me but they just want sx or guys on drugs/unstable etc.

@CogitoMori Virtual hug

I have tried to find my people too, believe me I have and guess what ? They also excluded me too.

I joined an online community and discord to connect with women like myself who has never had a boyfriend and being rejected by men is all I ever known throughout my life while other women get chosen. It was wonderful finally meeting a group women who actually understood what I have been going through my entire life. The community of women that I genuinely cared for and saw as friends cruelly drove me out of the community.

Everyday I always nice to all the women in on the discord server and helped them when they were having problems in their lives. I have use my past experiences to help others and I am very detailed, insightful but straight to the point in all my posts. I write a maximum of 3 paragraphs easy to read and clear advice. I always engaged with everyone but the moderator constantly picked me.

Last year I shared the struggleds I was having everyone on the server knew I was going through a difficult time. The moderator as usual was picking on me from day 1 for some reason she never seemed to like me. I only wrote 3 clear detailed paragraphs which went straight to the point.

She publicly criticised me for writing "novel long pages". She went on about her shitty workplace experience to publicly shame me for being upset about being fired from an unhealthy workplace and she kept cruelly shaming me even bringing old irrelevant posts.

The women who I always nice too sided with the moderator then they complained about my posts majority of the time they have been keeping quiet the entire time. They all pushed me out. It hurts losing a community of women who I finally connected with

I mean, you do kinda write long replies in this thread, but that doesn't mean the women in the discord should've treated you badly over your writing style, everyone is different.

 

[FireFox]

I had a similar experience with a trans discord group. I was driven out and called a "virus" for stating that covid-19 likely came from the virus factory down the street from the wet market, and that the CCP would cover up its release whether it was an accident or not because they'd look bad either way. I thought I was stating the obvious, but they said I was racist for saying that (because of the propaganda the CCP put out specifically to US liberals where they said anyone that said it came from the lab was racist) and ganged up on me. The one that said I was a virus was basically my trans mom and helped me pick my first masculine name.

@CogitoMori I have always believed from day 1 covid19 came from the lab. A couple of years before the covid19 pandemic there was concerns about security regarding viruses being housed in the Wuhan Institute Of Virology. The Wuhan institute of virology houses deadly viruses for research these viruses are Ebola, Sars and others.Scientists did warn if the lab doesn't fix up its security a deadly virus will escape in to the public.

China's top virus lab is in Wuhan, the center of the outbreak

The Wuhan National Laboratory opened in January 2018, with the highest safety rating and plans to study SARS and Ebola. A Nature article warned that some were concerned over its safety.

www.dailymail.co.uk

This is like Chernobyl. Before the Chernobyl the soviet government knew the nuclear reactor was faulty and concealed this information from all the workers working inside the plant and the world. The workers constantly using the faulty reactor it was inevitable the reactor was going to blow up due to the machine being worn out from factory workers using it when it should have been repaired.

The Chinese government throughout the pandemic have constantly lied to world and the World Health Organisation let them get away with it. In 2019 Dr Li Wenliang was warning his medical colleagues to be careful because they was a Sars like virus in the area. Dr Li Wenliang was arrested by Chinese police and in the February 2020 Dr Li Wenliang tragically passed away from covid19. He was a hero doctor who just cared for others and all he got was harassment from the state. People who spoke up about what the Chinese government was doing also went missing mysteriously too

'Hero who told the truth': Chinese rage over coronavirus death of whistleblower doctor

Demands for freedom of speech in the wake of Li Wenliang’s death have been censored by the authorities amid widespread outpouring of anger

www.theguardian.com

I do believe in the year 2019 something went wrong one day in that lab in Wuhan.

i can relate to this so much except my parents were carribean and abusive af. Unfortunately abuse is very normalised in carribean culture. I also was bullied for my looks and couldnt make friends. I dont get guys either other only old men compliment me but they just want sx or guys on drugs/unstable etc.

I mean, you do kinda write long replies in this thread, but that doesn't mean the women in the discord should've treated you badly over your writing style, everyone is different.

@ghost-shock One of the worst things about being a child of immigrants is our parents who can't relete to our struggles and problems. I admit this is why I don't talk to my family about my problems.

>I mean, you do kinda write long replies in this thread, but that doesn't mean the women in the discord should've treated you badly over your writing style, everyone is different.

These are the same people who be complaining online about how no one is real anymore and how society is "fake"