Venting Express Yourself: What’s on Your mind?

[NodusTollens]

Title: Where do the lights converge?

As my minds wanders by the light of the moon
I ask myself,

"Where do the lights converge?"

A question bathed in mystery,
Drifting through the firmament.
It's lonely-
The dark hides my flaws,
But no one knows what's real.

"Where do the lights converge?"

I demand from the sky
As I fall to my knees & weep
As I pray that someone hears me when I speak!
But the air above stands still...
Not a word, nor whisper
Nor gust to be felt.

"Where do the lights converge!"

Less question, more statement;
Furiously I insist, why am I in the dark!
There is light in this world
Yet it paints me- colourful
Words that permeate before I can speak.

I'll find where the lights converge...

————

Wanting to CTB is a deeply intimate experience, one not talked about enough mainstream. The spiritual journey, the mental health supports, the friends, family- the people we reach out to, & avenues we venture trying to come to terms with the thoughts in our heads...We are dismissed as attention seeking, thrown into involuntary holds- ignored.

————

Your Turn:

Drop a poem, creative writing or lyric that express how you're feeling right now.

 

[WornOutLife]

...I was dreaming of a dream last night
Oh little dream of my soul
I was dreaming of her
That in my arms she was...

In my case, she is The Death.

 

[NodusTollens]

...I was dreaming of a dream last night
Oh little dream of my soul
I was dreaming of her
That in my arms she was...

In my case, she is The Death.

—hugs—
Oh how the soul cries out, beautiful words.

I know this happens to me, but I wonder, do you also experience worse thought of self or CTB at night?

 

[WornOutLife]

—hugs—
Oh how the soul cries out, beautiful words.

I know this happens to me, but I wonder, do you also experience worse thought of self or CTB at night?

Both of them torment me day by day!
However, these days, what's haunting me lots is my past.

What about you?

PS: Beautiful poem the one you posted, btw.

 

[NodusTollens]

Both of them torment me day by day!
However, these days, what's haunting me lots is my past.

What about you?

PS: Beautiful poem the one you posted, btw.

Thank you. :)

Same. I've noticed when I'm not browsing through/chatting with people on SS, I am in maximum distraction mode. I am coming to terms with my thoughts & desires to execute them, but that doesn't stop the onslaught of anxious thoughts either for or against CTB.

Maybe setting aside time to "worry" is what I'm missing.

 

[YukiFox]

I have put all my devotion to you.
I hope you can bring to me your epiphany.
You have comforted me in my darkest hours,
And today is my worship retribution.
Perhaps I'm not a pious devotee,
Or give to you the best offers,
But certainly, I feel my redemption to you.
You will clean my inner tears,
Heal my mind wounds,
And give to me a new identity.
Goddess, you're welcome to my dwell,
Bless the yute necklace that I'll make you as an awe,
And kiss me in the head as your final blessing.
I will not fear anymore,
Because I will be in your arms.
Oh, Mother Ixtab,
Bless my rope and my path with you.

 

[EmptyManForever]

Empty my mind is
Empty here, empty there
In all directions it is just Empty
I sometimes wonder if my mind is still there
Where did it go?
Will it ever come back?
My dearest friend, brother ,soulmate is gone!
Oh where did you go?
Why did you leave me in this hell alone?
The poison they gave you was too strong !
The poison they gave you made you weak !
The poison they gave you inhibited the beauty of you!
Forgive me but I couldn't watch you suffer anymore like that
That's why I granted you freedom
But never thought you would leave forever
I'm sorry for what I've done
Oh dearest mind,
please do come back to me one day and we shall destroy everyone who harmed you
We will fight the good fight,
Together and always

 

[NodusTollens]

I have put all my devotion to you.
I hope you can bring to me your epiphany.
You have comforted me in my darkest hours,
And today is my worship retribution.
Perhaps I'm not a pious devotee,
Or give to you the best offers,
But certainly, I feel my redemption to you.
You will clean my inner tears,
Heal my mind wounds,
And give to me a new identity.
Goddess, you're welcome to my dwell,
Bless the yute necklace that I'll make you as an awe,
And kiss me in the head as your final blessing.
I will not fear anymore,
Because I will be in your arms.
Oh, Mother Ixtab,
Bless my rope and my path with you.

I can really feel your desire for change, and what you're willing to give to get what you're looking for.

Well written. :)

I hope the epiphany you seek find you. :)

Empty my mind is
Empty here, empty there
In all directions it is just Empty
I sometimes wonder if my mind is still there
Where did it go?
Will it ever come back?
My dearest friend, brother ,soulmate is gone!
Oh where did you go?
Why did you leave me in this hell alone?
The poison they gave you was too strong !
The poison they gave you made you weak !
The poison they gave you inhibited the beauty of you!
Forgive me but I couldn't watch you suffer anymore like that
That's why I granted you freedom
But never thought you would leave forever
I'm sorry for what I've done
Oh dearest mind,
please do come back to me one day and we shall destroy everyone who harmed you
We will fight the good fight,
Together and always

Wow, you can really feel the anguish in your words- the longing for the part of yourself that you've lost.

Beautifully written.

I hope you find what you are looking for. :)

 

[NodusTollens]

Detached! Thoughts cascade-
Gripping your spine, it tingles.
Showing signs of life.

 

[Deleted member 19276]

Ah, this will be hard, but I can try...

Shattered glass, shattered soul...
Where will you go?
As the night approaches, so will your foul.
To think of the better days, a future of unknown...
The morning is nearly here and so is your hope.

Really not into the writing poetry thing, so this was a bit of a failure of it's own.

 

[signifying nothing]

Committing a forgiveness.
Taking over the ground of early morning, waiting for no days anymore.
I await sunrise in calm.

 

[Mentalmick]

Popeye the sailor man.
Lived in a caravan.
Slept with his granny.
And tickled her fanny.
That's Popeye the sailor man.

 

[NodusTollens]

Ah, this will be hard, but I can try...

Shattered glass, shattered soul...
Where will you go?
As the night approaches, so will your foul.
To think of the better days, a future of unknown...
The morning is nearly here and so is your hope.

Really not into the writing poetry thing, so this was a bit of a failure of it's own.

I disagree. :) Poetry is really what you make it, there are many different styles.

I like what you've written. Its hard to wish for better days when hope is so hard to hold onto.

Popeye the sailor man.
Lived in a caravan.
Slept with his granny.
And tickled her fanny.
That's Popeye the sailor man.

 

[Deleted member 19276]

I disagree. :) Poetry is really what you make it, there are many different styles.

I like what you've written. Its hard to wish for better days when hope is so hard to hold onto.

Hey, thank you, really, I appreciate this message.

And true! Hope - The key to solving sadness, the lockpick to the gate of suffering too. Which will prevail?

 

[NodusTollens]

You're angry, Supernova.
Leaving destruction in your wake,
Many find themselves enraptured,
Soon realizing their mistake.

You're a burnout, Supernova.
Fragments contain your disabuse-
Many wishing to feast their eyes,
Withess the light that you produce.

But it's okay now, Supernova.
As you flounder in misery-
Confronted by your outbursts-
Have you lost their sympathy?

So rest now, Supernova.
Show them how your light burns bright-
Remember now, it's over...
Please, just rest now through the night.

 

[foxdie]

I just thought of this and it reminded of this thread. It's kinda cheesey but here goes.

My mind is like an onion
The deeper I cut in
The more layers reveal
How truly broken I am
And it makes me cry

 

[NodusTollens]

I just thought of this and it reminded of this thread. It's kinda cheesey but here goes.

My mind is like an onion
The deeper I cut in
The more layers reveal
How truly broken I am
And it makes me cry

Definitely not cheesy.
—hugs—

 

[SweetTangerine]

the heart of a young soul
oh how i'm jealous
neat and tidy
keeping beat
one two
red

the heart of a tortured soul
it's all i am used to
beaten and broken
offbeat, worn out
full of weight
nasty
dead

i never write poetry or anything of the sort. i hope this was okay to read.

 

[NodusTollens]

For someone who never writes, you did a good job. :)

& if you ever get stuck on rhymes, there are sites like Rhymezone that help with finding them.

 

[Sherri]

Very scared how the word is becoming. Afraid of the future, afraid of being controlled by the government and mostly afraid to be micro chipped. I reckon it's something in the cards soon.

 

[NodusTollens]

Very scared how the word is becoming. Afraid of the future, afraid of being controlled by the government and mostly afraid to be micro chipped. I reckon it's something in the cards soon.

Here's hoping we don't don't to that point anytime soon. :)

 

[Sherri]

Here's hoping we don't don't to that point anytime soon. :)

Hopefully my fellow op. But everting is leading at that direction. With microsoft even involved in creating the vaccine.....

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I used to write poems a lot during a phase I had. Most of them were cringe and also quite bad.
I mostly made them to pass the time.
Not caring how aggressive I'd force the rhyme.
I forgot all that stuff about beats and meter.
I fumbled through college by being a cheater.
It's cool how I'm free from my education
But now I have to go out and find a vocation.
I just don't want to do anything anymore.
Everything seems like such a chore.
I want to reach out to her.
Even though our time together feels like a blur.
I wish she hadn't even given me a chance.
I'm not worth it and that's my stance.
I can't wait for 2022.
That's when I can finally do
My most noblest act.
I'm going to avenge the attacked
The attacked is me.
The attacker is also me.
He's going to die
And I'm not gonna lie,
It will feel really good
To do all along what I should
Have done five years ago.
But I just couldn't let it go.
For now though I have to wait
For now it's still too late.

 

[NodusTollens]

Well written, I enjoyed reading it.
Good luck with your noble act.

 

[NodusTollens]

I exist in pieces...
Fragments of a life lived out of order.
Just a runaway on a train,
Watching milestones pass
as another stop on the line.
Longing for the last stop...

 

[DocNo]

parts of me want to want,
but sometimes i don't see a meaning anymore.

so even pleasure feels empty and soulless,
like a distraction not to face the inevitable.

seems my last remaining passion fades,
watching it disappearing on the horizon.

left without any why,
despite it's an ok how,
it drags me closer to the end.

 

[stygal]

I wish I would have had just one thing in life that I for or that I loved or that had given me strength.

I honestly don't even know why I carried on up until now: for my family, my job, my image?

My life has fallen so flat in the last two years - I even stopped writing down thoughts in my journal.
In the end the only thing that was left was self-pity (and no more development) and that's not really worthy to pen down in my opinion.

I feel like I am a cardboard cutout of a human being.

Though having nothing also means having nothing to lose.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I reflect on my reflection,
And I ask myself the question.
What's the right direction, to go?
I don't know.

Am I a conservative or am I a liberal?
(Am I a liberal?)
If I'm a liberal then I'm a very boomer liberal.
(Very boomer liberal)
Am I a liberal or am I a conservative?
(Am I a conservative?)
If I'm a conservative, that makes me an sjw of a conservative.
(An sjw of a conservative)

I look into these eyes,
And I don't recognize,
The one I see inside.
It's time for me to decide.

Am I a conservative or am I a liberal?
(Am I a liberal?)
If I'm a liberal well I'm a very boomer liberal.
(Very boomer liberal)
Am I a liberal or am I a conservative?
(Am I a conservative?)
If I'm a conservative that makes me an sjw of a conservative.
(An sjw of a conservative)

Here I go again,
I'm always running out of time.
I think I've made up my mind.
Now I understand, who I am.

I'm a conservative.
I'm a liberal.
I'm an sjw of a conservative.
I'm a very boomer liberal.
I'm a contradictory moderate!

That's what I am.

(Ripped most of this off from the Man or Muppet song originally done for The Muppets 2011 movie )

 

[NodusTollens]

Born:
In my grave I sit,
Waiting.

While pain festers like disease,
It supersedes boundaries
Holding dignity hostage.

Stealing like a thief in the night
It lays hands upon my psyche,
As I'm beaten into submission
Complacent, wishing for rain.

The unprovoked showers of contempt
Blend with tears that stream,
Threatening to drown, and
Forcing your hand.

 

[NodusTollens]

I crave that sweet release...
The exposure
Of baring it all.
Yet,
Fear cultivates my soul,
Reprimanded, restrained
Chemically balanced.
Fraudulent desires to live
Garnered by
Societal standards.
Hello,
How may I help you?