Z
zengiraffe
Member
- Feb 29, 2024
- 65
Around 2 years ago I attempted to kill myself using the inert gas asphyxiation method and failed. Here's a report of what I did and where I think I made mistakes that ultimately caused me to fail.
I bought an 80cf (cubic feet) compressed argon gas cylinder from a gas supply store. I've never been inside a gas supply store before and was very nervous I would say or do something that the staff would find suspicious, but my fears were totally unwarranted, everything went swimmingly and I was out of the store with my cylinder in under 10 minutes.
I also bought an oxygen meter from Amazon. The oxygen content in air is 20.9%, and when I turned the meter on that's the reading it would show. I tested the meter by breathing on it (our breath is largely carbon dioxide) and the reading went down to ~10%, so I was satisfied that it worked. I then tested the gas in the cylinder by putting the oxygen meter in a small container and then filled that container with gas from the cylinder and I saw the meter go down to ~5%, so I was satisfied that the gas in the cylinder was likely pure argon.
Now I know almost everyone says to use an exit bag, but I was really concerned that the exit bag would slip off of my head during the attempt, or that the flow of gas into the bag will pop it after I lose consciousness but before I die and I would survive the attempt but not without getting severe brain damage. I really wanted to avoid these possibilities, so I decided against using an exit bag and chose to use an exit room instead. This room was actually a shoe closet, and after measuring the inner dimensions I determined there was ~60cf of space inside this closet. I would take this closet and turn it into my own homemade Sarco pod, basically.
I cleared everything out from the closet, put myself, the oxygen meter, the argon gas cylinder, a couple flashlights, and a bunch of tape inside. Once inside I used the flashlights to see and the tape to cover anything that would allow air to flow in or out of the closet. I taped it up from the inside and made it as air-tight as possible, with the exception of one small vent hole near the top of the closest. I felt the vent hole was necessary so that the pressure in the closest wouldn't increase as I filled it with argon gas, otherwise the increased pressure might crack the door and cause air to leak in. The reason I put it near the top of the closest is because pure argon is slightly heavier than regular air, so it will fill up the closet from bottom to top, so any gas that escapes from the top vent hole would likely be regular air and not argon.
Once that was done I sat down on the floor of the closet and turned the gas regulator on the cylinder to flow rate of about 10cfh (cubic feet per hour). This would expend all of the gas in the cylinder in about 8 hours, and will completely fill up the closet in 6 hours, although since I was at the very bottom of the closet I assumed the oxygen content where my head as at would decrease enough within an hour for me to lose consciousness, and that I would likely be brain dead within 1.5 - 2 hours. Just to make sure that everything was working as expected I also turned on the oxygen meter and left it on the floor next to me, checking the reading on the meter periodically. After about 30 minutes the oxygen percent at the floor level was only about 8%, and at my head level it was about 16%. After 1 hour the oxygen percent at the floor level was only about 3%, and at my head level it was about 11%. I started freaking out at this point. The reason I was freaking out is because if the readings on the meter were accurate I definitely should have lost consciousness already yet I was totally alert. I started thinking maybe the meter is broken, or maybe the gas in the cylinder isn't as pure as I thought, or maybe the closet isn't air tight and air is still sneaking in from somewhere. I thought if I stayed there any longer I might not kill myself but just give myself permanent brain damage. I panicked and busted the door open, which took almost 5 minutes because of how heavily I taped it up from the inside.
Anyway, here's what I learned:
1) The longer the method takes, the more time it gives your SI to kick in. Any method that takes longer than 30 minutes is way too long. Even 10 minutes is too long. If I could have done things differently I would have set the gas flow rate to 60cfh instead of 10cfh, so that the room would fill up in 1 hour instead of 6, and the oxygen percent at my head level would drop below ~10% in around 10-15 minutes.
2) People online say that 15% oxygen in the air is already low enough to cause loss of consciousness. That's bullshit. I could have played a game of chess at 11% oxygen. It makes sense that the body can easily survive with that amount, because there are people who due to unfortunate circumstances need to have one of their lungs surgically removed and then they live out the rest of their lives just fine with only one lung remaining. A person with one lung who breathes at the same rate as a person with two lungs would process half of the amount of air volume over the same period of time, so a one lung individual is effectively breathing at 10.45% oxygen all the time. That an oxygen level of 10% is dangerous is propaganda made up by Big Oxygen. Do not believe the lies! If you are serious about killing yourself using inert gas asphyxiation you absolutely need to put yourself in an environment where the oxygen content is 5% or lower. Again if I could have done things differently I should have increased the gas flow rate to drop the oxygen percent in the closet faster.
3) I have mixed feelings about using the exit room. Maybe I bit off more than I could chew trying to fill up an entire closet with argon gas. The exit bag would have been way faster and more efficient for sure, but I just can't shake the concern that something with the bag will fail and that will cause the entire attempt to fail, possibly with irreversible brain damage.
4) Just buy a shotgun. This is America. Why waste time with elaborate methods like inert gas asphyxiation that require a ton of research, planning, and coordination to get right when $200 and a 10 minute drive to your nearest gun store will get you a piece of equipment that is significantly more lethal, more reliable, faster, and easier to kill yourself with? Shotguns are the way! After getting a shotgun and shooting it at a gun range I know I have something I can use to take myself out at any time, and with virtually 100% certainty. All other methods just seem like suicide roleplay to me now. I do feel bad for people in other countries with no gun rights that have to resort to these methods though, I know it's not roleplay for them.
Well anyway, I hope this post helps someone in some way. Thanks for reading.
I bought an 80cf (cubic feet) compressed argon gas cylinder from a gas supply store. I've never been inside a gas supply store before and was very nervous I would say or do something that the staff would find suspicious, but my fears were totally unwarranted, everything went swimmingly and I was out of the store with my cylinder in under 10 minutes.
I also bought an oxygen meter from Amazon. The oxygen content in air is 20.9%, and when I turned the meter on that's the reading it would show. I tested the meter by breathing on it (our breath is largely carbon dioxide) and the reading went down to ~10%, so I was satisfied that it worked. I then tested the gas in the cylinder by putting the oxygen meter in a small container and then filled that container with gas from the cylinder and I saw the meter go down to ~5%, so I was satisfied that the gas in the cylinder was likely pure argon.
Now I know almost everyone says to use an exit bag, but I was really concerned that the exit bag would slip off of my head during the attempt, or that the flow of gas into the bag will pop it after I lose consciousness but before I die and I would survive the attempt but not without getting severe brain damage. I really wanted to avoid these possibilities, so I decided against using an exit bag and chose to use an exit room instead. This room was actually a shoe closet, and after measuring the inner dimensions I determined there was ~60cf of space inside this closet. I would take this closet and turn it into my own homemade Sarco pod, basically.
I cleared everything out from the closet, put myself, the oxygen meter, the argon gas cylinder, a couple flashlights, and a bunch of tape inside. Once inside I used the flashlights to see and the tape to cover anything that would allow air to flow in or out of the closet. I taped it up from the inside and made it as air-tight as possible, with the exception of one small vent hole near the top of the closest. I felt the vent hole was necessary so that the pressure in the closest wouldn't increase as I filled it with argon gas, otherwise the increased pressure might crack the door and cause air to leak in. The reason I put it near the top of the closest is because pure argon is slightly heavier than regular air, so it will fill up the closet from bottom to top, so any gas that escapes from the top vent hole would likely be regular air and not argon.
Once that was done I sat down on the floor of the closet and turned the gas regulator on the cylinder to flow rate of about 10cfh (cubic feet per hour). This would expend all of the gas in the cylinder in about 8 hours, and will completely fill up the closet in 6 hours, although since I was at the very bottom of the closet I assumed the oxygen content where my head as at would decrease enough within an hour for me to lose consciousness, and that I would likely be brain dead within 1.5 - 2 hours. Just to make sure that everything was working as expected I also turned on the oxygen meter and left it on the floor next to me, checking the reading on the meter periodically. After about 30 minutes the oxygen percent at the floor level was only about 8%, and at my head level it was about 16%. After 1 hour the oxygen percent at the floor level was only about 3%, and at my head level it was about 11%. I started freaking out at this point. The reason I was freaking out is because if the readings on the meter were accurate I definitely should have lost consciousness already yet I was totally alert. I started thinking maybe the meter is broken, or maybe the gas in the cylinder isn't as pure as I thought, or maybe the closet isn't air tight and air is still sneaking in from somewhere. I thought if I stayed there any longer I might not kill myself but just give myself permanent brain damage. I panicked and busted the door open, which took almost 5 minutes because of how heavily I taped it up from the inside.
Anyway, here's what I learned:
1) The longer the method takes, the more time it gives your SI to kick in. Any method that takes longer than 30 minutes is way too long. Even 10 minutes is too long. If I could have done things differently I would have set the gas flow rate to 60cfh instead of 10cfh, so that the room would fill up in 1 hour instead of 6, and the oxygen percent at my head level would drop below ~10% in around 10-15 minutes.
2) People online say that 15% oxygen in the air is already low enough to cause loss of consciousness. That's bullshit. I could have played a game of chess at 11% oxygen. It makes sense that the body can easily survive with that amount, because there are people who due to unfortunate circumstances need to have one of their lungs surgically removed and then they live out the rest of their lives just fine with only one lung remaining. A person with one lung who breathes at the same rate as a person with two lungs would process half of the amount of air volume over the same period of time, so a one lung individual is effectively breathing at 10.45% oxygen all the time. That an oxygen level of 10% is dangerous is propaganda made up by Big Oxygen. Do not believe the lies! If you are serious about killing yourself using inert gas asphyxiation you absolutely need to put yourself in an environment where the oxygen content is 5% or lower. Again if I could have done things differently I should have increased the gas flow rate to drop the oxygen percent in the closet faster.
3) I have mixed feelings about using the exit room. Maybe I bit off more than I could chew trying to fill up an entire closet with argon gas. The exit bag would have been way faster and more efficient for sure, but I just can't shake the concern that something with the bag will fail and that will cause the entire attempt to fail, possibly with irreversible brain damage.
4) Just buy a shotgun. This is America. Why waste time with elaborate methods like inert gas asphyxiation that require a ton of research, planning, and coordination to get right when $200 and a 10 minute drive to your nearest gun store will get you a piece of equipment that is significantly more lethal, more reliable, faster, and easier to kill yourself with? Shotguns are the way! After getting a shotgun and shooting it at a gun range I know I have something I can use to take myself out at any time, and with virtually 100% certainty. All other methods just seem like suicide roleplay to me now. I do feel bad for people in other countries with no gun rights that have to resort to these methods though, I know it's not roleplay for them.
Well anyway, I hope this post helps someone in some way. Thanks for reading.