This forum has given me so much information, I figured I'd contribute what I learned.
Attempt
I used the non-ratchet half of a ratchet strap, specifically this one from Harbor Freight. I made a noose using a slip knot. I tied it around the rod for clothes in a closet using a bowline knot such that the noose was about level with my neck when I was on my knees.
I put my neck in the noose and let my upper body go limp such that the rope took the weight on my neck. I started having black at the edge of my vision and ringing in my ears rapidly, and lost consciousness not long after (quicker than I expected). While I was under it felt halfway between a dream and trying to think - nothing visual (unlike a dream), and no ability to keep a train of thought, but it felt like I was trying to have a train of thought. Then, I woke up, in the same place and position but able to breathe, gasping for breath. I didn't remember what I had done and was trying to remember what I had just been thinking about. The noose was tight and uncomfortable but didn't impede my breathing. I loosened the noose, and remembered around then what I had been doing and why. According to the time on my phone, there were about two minutes between when I put my head in the noose and when I woke up. I was panicking and crying, and had a visible red mark around the base of my neck where the rope had sunk in.
After I calmed down, I decided this hadn't changed my desire to ctb, so I tried again. Same experience going down. This time when I woke up I had spun 180° and had knocked my glasses off my face (pretty violently, because when I found them I had bent out the right arm noticeably). Again, it was about two minutes, and there was a second red mark. This time the panic overwhelmed me and I called for help.
Aftermath
The person I called encouraged me to go to the ER and I was in enough shock and numb enough to go along with it, and told the truth as to the cause of my injuries. They took a CT scan of my head and neck, and everything came back normal. They put me in an involuntary hold at the mental hospital for 72 hours. After the 72 hours were up, they encouraged me to sign in voluntarily, and ultimately discharged me after 8 days.
The marks had faded down to a slight brown with the texture of a scab after about 5 days, and right now (9 days after) is the same.
What I did wrong
Looking at Evelyn Lane's compilation of successful partial hangings, the noose was generally higher up, close to the neck when standing. They also show the body spasming after going unconscious, so I suspect that my position was too close to a stable position - it found a position it could breathe in while flailing.
Feel free to ask me any questions. I might not answer all but happy to spread whatever info I can.
Attempt
I used the non-ratchet half of a ratchet strap, specifically this one from Harbor Freight. I made a noose using a slip knot. I tied it around the rod for clothes in a closet using a bowline knot such that the noose was about level with my neck when I was on my knees.
I put my neck in the noose and let my upper body go limp such that the rope took the weight on my neck. I started having black at the edge of my vision and ringing in my ears rapidly, and lost consciousness not long after (quicker than I expected). While I was under it felt halfway between a dream and trying to think - nothing visual (unlike a dream), and no ability to keep a train of thought, but it felt like I was trying to have a train of thought. Then, I woke up, in the same place and position but able to breathe, gasping for breath. I didn't remember what I had done and was trying to remember what I had just been thinking about. The noose was tight and uncomfortable but didn't impede my breathing. I loosened the noose, and remembered around then what I had been doing and why. According to the time on my phone, there were about two minutes between when I put my head in the noose and when I woke up. I was panicking and crying, and had a visible red mark around the base of my neck where the rope had sunk in.
After I calmed down, I decided this hadn't changed my desire to ctb, so I tried again. Same experience going down. This time when I woke up I had spun 180° and had knocked my glasses off my face (pretty violently, because when I found them I had bent out the right arm noticeably). Again, it was about two minutes, and there was a second red mark. This time the panic overwhelmed me and I called for help.
Aftermath
The person I called encouraged me to go to the ER and I was in enough shock and numb enough to go along with it, and told the truth as to the cause of my injuries. They took a CT scan of my head and neck, and everything came back normal. They put me in an involuntary hold at the mental hospital for 72 hours. After the 72 hours were up, they encouraged me to sign in voluntarily, and ultimately discharged me after 8 days.
The marks had faded down to a slight brown with the texture of a scab after about 5 days, and right now (9 days after) is the same.
What I did wrong
Looking at Evelyn Lane's compilation of successful partial hangings, the noose was generally higher up, close to the neck when standing. They also show the body spasming after going unconscious, so I suspect that my position was too close to a stable position - it found a position it could breathe in while flailing.
Feel free to ask me any questions. I might not answer all but happy to spread whatever info I can.
