fishlover
in the end, nothing matters
- Sep 17, 2023
- 143
ever since i got laid off a couple of weeks ago, ive fallen into a hole where i have no motivation for anything at all. i don't have any hope in finding another job. my resume is alright but i never finished college, so i feel like i have no value to employers. but it's not like im going back to school again or anything.
im eating through the little savings i have, and financially i'm not doing well. my only saving grace is that i live with my mom, and have another (less nice, but stable) living option as back up.
but as long as i'm not working, i'm like an annoying house fly in my mom's eyes. i cant be damned to do anything- but even the little i do is never appreciated. i get no gratitude from her at all. i feel like im expected to fail, and be a piece of shit, so why even bother trying?
i wish i could find another job again just to be useful, but i dont know. it's hard. i want to die. the moment i lost my job, i wanted to die.
i feel alone. even though i have an amazing boyfriend, he's all i have. i want to talk to my friend again, but my bf made me cut contact with him. i feel isolated. i dont have any other friends, no one at all. if i lose my bf, i have nothing.
everything feels like a pain to do, living is like walking through a 10 foot tall wall of sludge. right now im a burden on my mom and my bf. what is even the point of anything at all?
im eating through the little savings i have, and financially i'm not doing well. my only saving grace is that i live with my mom, and have another (less nice, but stable) living option as back up.
but as long as i'm not working, i'm like an annoying house fly in my mom's eyes. i cant be damned to do anything- but even the little i do is never appreciated. i get no gratitude from her at all. i feel like im expected to fail, and be a piece of shit, so why even bother trying?
i wish i could find another job again just to be useful, but i dont know. it's hard. i want to die. the moment i lost my job, i wanted to die.
i feel alone. even though i have an amazing boyfriend, he's all i have. i want to talk to my friend again, but my bf made me cut contact with him. i feel isolated. i dont have any other friends, no one at all. if i lose my bf, i have nothing.
everything feels like a pain to do, living is like walking through a 10 foot tall wall of sludge. right now im a burden on my mom and my bf. what is even the point of anything at all?