Hard to live in the moment

[torturedmind]

I'm sure there are many people on here who feel the same way. It is so hard for me to "live in the moment". I find myself constantly worrying about the future, often to the point of nearly having a panic attack. I worry about my loved ones getting sick and dying, I worry about what my life is going to look like ten years from now (if I make it that long), I worry that I will never be able to make friends, I worry about things to the point that I struggle to find peace in my day to day life. The sick reality of life is constantly looming over my head. The reality of life which is that we are all dying from the moment we are born. We are all living to die. I wish there was an explanation as to why we are all here in the first place. To have such intense and overwhelming emotions for no reason just seems so twisted to me. I wish I was an animal, like a cat or dog, who just lives its life without dealing with the complexity of having a human brain and body. Animals don't worry about the future, or the past.

 

[Loaf of bread]

Same, the stress about the future hurts so much, its so torturous to have these thoughts

I wish I could just live in the moment too, silly monkey brain

 

[YEAR2050]

i agree with this sentiment a lot - especially the part about being a less intelligent animal.
once youve seen existence for what it really is, its impossible to put the veil back on, so to speak.

 

[sunsetting]

Yeah I'm either missing the past or loathing the future, the moment is meh so don't really care

 

[LukaParrot]

That's a lot of anxiety my friend.

Maybe the second worst thing people are suffering too. First one is depression.

There are meds that can help you and improve your life. Maybe that's what you need, think about. Look for help, a doctor, in general, psychologist or psychiatrist.

Wish you better days.

 

[torturedmind]

That's a lot of anxiety my friend.

Maybe the second worst thing people are suffering too. First one is depression.

There are meds that can help you and improve your life. Maybe that's what you need, think about. Look for help, a doctor, in general, psychologist or psychiatrist.

Wish you better days.

Thank you, I appreciate your response. I have major depression as well as anxiety. I take medication for both. Sometimes I think I'd like to try a different medication, but I feel like the trial and error of it all is just too much for me. Last time I tried a different medication, it made my depression worse. I may see a psychiatrist in the new year to see if they have any suggestions.

 

[divinemistress36]

The happiest people live in the moment it seems I can only think about the past and the future with anxiety and depression

 

[ShatteredSerenity]

Practicing meditation can train your mind to stay in the present moment. I found it to be very effective when I was more stable.

Now I'm in a severe depression and nothing helps with the flood of despondent thoughts and memories. Meditation is no match for bipolar disorder. Medication has numbed some of the pain and made thoughts seem more distant, but they're still unanimously negative and incredibly painful. I've lost everything important in my life that I was living for, so all that remains inside my head is a vast sea of loss and grief.

 

[opheliaoveragain]

fully relate OP! I rarely feel like i'm fully present. it's a hard thing to do when anxiety and panic disorders get in the way. even harder to explain to those that haven't experienced it.

sending you hugs hugs

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand, personally I find it so torturous and painful to be conscious in this existence capable of suffering to unlimited amounts, there's just so much cruelty in existing, more than anything I wish I never suffered at all. But anyway I wish you the best.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I remember reading Eckart Tolle's 'The Power of Now' and getting a lot from it.

However, I've never thought the statement was terribly practical. We simply have to think about the future in order to prepare for it. I expect a lot of what we're doing in the present is preparing us for the future. I guess the problem is, when we start worrying about things that haven't happened yet. I'm very guilty of catastrophizing.

I suppose I do firmly believe though- you need to do stuff right now to work towards what you want out of life. It's unlikely to just happen. Definitely, some of it is out of our control. Some problems we can mitigate though.

So- concerns about friendship. Are you making the effort to meet people in order to make friends? Are you maintaining the friendships you do have? If you struggle with things like social anxiety (I do,) is it worth seeking out support to try and get over that?

We can't stop people becoming ill and dying but, we can make the effort to be with them and help them while they're still alive. It's certainly awful to envisage it but I think we also have to sometimes figure out how we would be able to be independent of them.

In regards to appreciating 'the now' though, I've felt like certain things should work. Not necessarily that they do of course. But, I think you need to do as much as you can about what's worrying you. Work on cv's, apply to jobs, get in contact with old friends, ring family members, join an evening class, research things that might help. Whatever. But then- know that you've done all you can at that point to try and help out 'future you'. And now, you deserve a rest. Then, try to relax enough to feel like you deserve that film or music or whatever. Know that there's no more you can do right now to help your future self and that worrying likely won't make much difference at all.

Probably obvious stuff and, it doesn't always work for me. Funnily enough, having ideation has helped in that regard. I'll often remind myself I likely don't have a whole long future to worry about!

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

Other animal's don't worry , but they can't plan for the future to avoid extreme torture. So when ticks infect with Lyme, when botflys insert their larva in Nasal cavities to grow , tape worms …. Etc then they can only suffer . When they become weak with sickness and eaten alive….i at least can plan to avoid future suffering and extreme torture …. I can ctb to skip over extreme suffering to get to non-existence forever. Everyone everything will die a cease to exist forever . Th only difference is how much extreme suffering will be avoided until beautiful non-existentce