Has anyone considered total disappearance instead of CTB?

[illvoid]

Recently this has become a more appealing option to me. I don't know if this is just poor decision making due to my mental health, but I know that I don't want to die. I simply don't want to live in my current situation anymore. I would be absolutely content with no longer existing, but I still have goals and ambitions that I'd like to fulfill & things that do make my life worth living. If it were possible, I would LOVE to disappear. I'm not talking about assuming a new identity, but rather moving completely off the grid and leaving my home behind. I think my life would be a lot more peaceful if only a select few people knew where I was & when. I honestly feel like this would be a better "way out" for me than CTB, and I'm curious if anyone else feels this way?

 

[N7_Alliance_Marine]

Disappearing may be a better option than self-deletion. I don't know to what extent the government would go through to find you or if they would just leave you be. It's definitely worth a shot to try that out. It could even be fun.

 

[cotton]

Yeah the idea of starting again is good but I don't want to leave my country.

I can't start again fully, but if I do I need to make money I guess:/ if I could have a fresh start with a new job I'd seriously consider it but I don't want to leave the person I care about behind... I've done it so much I don't want to do it again.

But yeah, it's so appealing.

How would you sort of do it? I wouldn't know where I'd like to settle tbh rn

 

[Shadows From Hell]

I've pondered that thought for years of disappearing, or ctb. These last few weeks, I've been leaning towards disappearing, and leaving no trace or paper trail of my plans or where I could be heading.

I am very seriously considering doing this once spring hits(just in case I gotta sleep under a bridge some nights).

 

[RiverOfLife]

Problem with disappearing is - no matter where you go, there you are.

 

[Warlord's Pulse]

Thought about this a lot. Sometimes, even considering fake my own death.

 

[illvoid]

Yeah the idea of starting again is good but I don't want to leave my country.

I can't start again fully, but if I do I need to make money I guess:/ if I could have a fresh start with a new job I'd seriously consider it but I don't want to leave the person I care about behind... I've done it so much I don't want to do it again.

But yeah, it's so appealing.

How would you sort of do it? I wouldn't know where I'd like to settle tbh rn

Honestly, I don't have much of a plan at this point. I think I would leave my country but I wouldn't be able to take a plane since there'd be a record of that. All I know is that I don't want to be found.

 

[AbacusRex]

I'd do this if I could. Problem for me is people would come looking.

 

[J&L383]

Problem with disappearing is - no matter where you go, there you are.

Exactly. I want to disappear from me.

 

[landmine]

i thought about this for so long, since a child! even thoughts of being kidnapped so i can be away from my situation, but ik if i were to be kidnapped it wont be any better. its just been a romanticized way of mine to get away from everything and be with one person.

recently, its changed to wanting to live away with my boyfriend. i want him to take me away from here and live with him in a safe place. away from friends and family

 

[JoeFailure]

I've thought about that but it's almost impossible. There's always a way to track you. Unless you have nobody that would look for you, which it sounds crazy but would actually be kind of cool. You really could just assume a new life.

But yeah I'd still have to deal with being me.

 

[katara]

Disappearing may be a better option than self-deletion. I don't know to what extent the government would go through to find you or if they would just leave you be. It's definitely worth a shot to try that out. It could even be fun.

𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐮𝐬? 𝐈 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲, 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦.

 

[JoeFailure]

𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐮𝐬? 𝐈 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲, 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦.

I think (I could be wrong) what they mean by that is if someone reported them missing or if they have debts but with no record of them being dead, they do have ways to find you. You could probably run from the debts part but if you have anyone looking for you and they get the feds involved, it's really hard at this point to just "disappear" with all the ways they'd have to find you.

 

[SnowLeopard21]

My life's goal is to eventually buy or build a vessel that can sustain me for months at sea. It's not an unusual thought, no.

 

[fleetingnight]

If I live, this is how I want to do it. I'm not sure how likely it is, but it's possible.

 

[Life'sA6itch]

Recently this has become a more appealing option to me. I don't know if this is just poor decision making due to my mental health, but I know that I don't want to die. I simply don't want to live in my current situation anymore. I would be absolutely content with no longer existing, but I still have goals and ambitions that I'd like to fulfill & things that do make my life worth living. If it were possible, I would LOVE to disappear. I'm not talking about assuming a new identity, but rather moving completely off the grid and leaving my home behind. I think my life would be a lot more peaceful if only a select few people knew where I was & when. I honestly feel like this would be a better "way out" for me than CTB, and I'm curious if anyone else feels this way?

I've thought of this and decided against it. I'd still have the same money problems and severe allergies but in a different location, but I'm certain it is a great reset for a fair number of people who can see it through.

 

[HereTomorrow]

Realistically I don't think I can escape from the government or change of identity, but a new scenery would be nice. I genuinely love my family but I've been secretly building up funds to move away suddenly once I have the chance. I could meet new people, new places, a new home. It won't fix everything, not the mental health system trauma or sexual abuse, but it breaks my shakles of the limits I have at home right now, surrounded by people who remind me of everything I went through, reminding me I'm the only adult child (15+ children combined in multiple households) in the family who never finished college.

Unfortunately, such a move is costly and permanent in my eyes. I know better than to run away now and end up homeless from poverty. I'm looking to build six figures before I seriously finalize, which I should in a few years. I'm hoping a move somewhere in the western states, a rural community town within reasonable distance to large cities, and of course an arcade because I'm that kind of person. If the pay allows me to live there, I don't mind being lower middle class. Maybe find a wife there, raise children and give them the love and support I didn't get while placing reasonable limits and hear out their rebellion and their reason and make deals to give them independence but safety. I love seeing others happy.

If it all fails, CTB is still an option for me, but it's better to try and fail than never try. I hope my family forgives me, and they're not dead to me, but I need a new life. One day. One day in the far future, I aspire for that journey.

 

[Wonhun]

It does not matter, just look at the movie Cast Away but people do not care about your disapperance. The entire life is just surviving in a stranded island.

 

[theboy]

Yes, I guess we all heard that at one time or another. It's starting from 0

 

[Tired_of_myself]

I tried to disappear and it worked in a way, but eventually you met new people that makes you wanna disappear also. My dream is to not became personal with no one and be alone in peace in a country no one knows me.

 

[lilah]

I tried to disappear and it worked in a way, but eventually you met new people that makes you wanna disappear also. My dream is to not became personal with no one and be alone in peace in a country no one knows me.

such a good point

I can't start again fully, but if I do I need to make money I guess:/

honestly, being far away from the people who stress you out can be so liberating that it might become easier to make money and be independant. most of us are financially stuck bc we can't be ourselves. be are not allowed to be ourselves and we use all our energy to hold ourselves into a box. and the people around us also don't want to see us free regardless of what they say.

i want him to take me away from here and live with him in a safe place. away from friends and family

evebtually he'll become an even bigger problem trust me. this kind of scenarion always end up with the girl being even more traumatised by her savior bc he knows you have no one behind you.

 

[katara]

I tried to disappear and it worked in a way, but eventually you met new people that makes you wanna disappear also. My dream is to not became personal with no one and be alone in peace in a country no one knows me.

right so like re-invent yourself, that's how i feel too. I don't have any money to move tho

 

[alienfreak]

The way you guys talk about it seems oddly dramatised to me. Just move away, tell people you're leaving, stop talking to them. I did it myself already. This way you can achieve the same thing without 'faking your death' and without having police looking for you, embassies contacting you, etc. If dont want people in your life then cut them off. But then what? You're still alone in a meaningless, fucked world, with the same broken brain, what do you even want to do? The pain is still there. If you did have people that cared about you, you will gain a persistent sense of guilt about all the people you hurt by abandoning them.

If you want to try changing your life in some dramatic way as a last ditch effort before ctb then go for it. It doesnt have to be extreme hyperbolic fantasy

 

[Tired_of_myself]

right so like re-invent yourself, that's how i feel too. I don't have any money to move tho

Me too, it's hard to this in your own hometown - would say impossible lol I wish I had the money too, would be perfect

 

[landmine]

evebtually he'll become an even bigger problem trust me. this kind of scenarion always end up with the girl being even more traumatised by her savior bc he knows you have no one behind you.

and if it were to ever get like that, i can always just CTB.

 

[Opera]

Recently this has become a more appealing option to me. I don't know if this is just poor decision making due to my mental health, but I know that I don't want to die. I simply don't want to live in my current situation anymore. I would be absolutely content with no longer existing, but I still have goals and ambitions that I'd like to fulfill & things that do make my life worth living. If it were possible, I would LOVE to disappear. I'm not talking about assuming a new identity, but rather moving completely off the grid and leaving my home behind. I think my life would be a lot more peaceful if only a select few people knew where I was & when. I honestly feel like this would be a better "way out" for me than CTB, and I'm curious if anyone else feels this way?

I've always thought of this as a kid. Whenever I was outside I thought of just running away and never returning home, and it's so much more freeing. It's something I still feel, but right now I can't do that. It's definitely something to consider though.

 

[sla_porra22]

I like the idea of disappearing, but the idea of "starting from scratch" is horrible for me. I would like to live in a forest, isolated from everything and everyone. Just me and no one else. So I believe it is a "normal" idea. I wish I had the money to do this. I've already considered the idea of becoming a wanderer and completing this idea lol

 

[SchizoGymnast]

Recently this has become a more appealing option to me. I don't know if this is just poor decision making due to my mental health, but I know that I don't want to die. I simply don't want to live in my current situation anymore. I would be absolutely content with no longer existing, but I still have goals and ambitions that I'd like to fulfill & things that do make my life worth living. If it were possible, I would LOVE to disappear. I'm not talking about assuming a new identity, but rather moving completely off the grid and leaving my home behind. I think my life would be a lot more peaceful if only a select few people knew where I was & when. I honestly feel like this would be a better "way out" for me than CTB, and I'm curious if anyone else feels this way?

I've thought about disappearing in NYC or Shanghai.

 

[Gorbolflungus]

I've thought about this but never actually planned on doing it, way too much stuff to take into consideration and kinda risky.

 

[Todsünde]

I actually did this for quite some time. A lot happened and I rly couldn't take anything anymore so I've decided to do one last stupid thing in my life. It resulted in me packing my backpack, hopping on a train and drive to another country. From there I just started to walk south because it was back in october 2021 and I've wanted to escape winter.
It's been one hell of a ride since then and I'm still homeless and struggling with certain shit but I managed to get closet to my actual dream and bought 2 cameras for example and started to learn to edit and stuff. I'm still homeless, I still have a lot to deal with but if I wouldn't have just started this journey away from my previous life I'd be for sure dead already.
Oh and btw. I rly don't think you need money to get out and do this. Money makes it easier, that's for sure but there are plenty of opportunities in this world to support yourself and make some money. It's definitely not a life that suits many people tho.