Discussion Has anyone else considered/tried using their eating disorder as a method of suicide?

[6000qqq]

I've tried to use it in my favor in the past, but for me, my ED makes it so food and losing weight is a real reason to live. Not only that but throughout all of this, I have found out just how resilient the human body is to self destruction. A constant thought that always pulls me out of my suicidal ideation is "I can't die yet because I'm not skinny enough." So while my ED makes me want to die, it also makes me want to live to see what my body will look like if I keep doing what I'm doing.

 

[Leesap]

How do you get through the hunger. I'm so hungry I have a headache and vertigo, how do you get past it?

 

[6000qqq]

How do you get through the hunger. I'm so hungry I have a headache and vertigo, how do you get past it?

If I'm being 100% Honestly, I just sleep it off. I really don't have any special tips for that one.

 

[Leesap]

If I'm being 100% Honestly, I just sleep it off. I really don't have any special tips for that one.

I can't sleep wish I could. Eh.

 

[Donewith_]

idk what disorder i have.. i have never been officially diagnosed about this, but.. i always used to eat less.
I hated eating .. I used to faint from weakness.. but still.. i did not like to eat when i was younger.
I am healthy now.. I eat enough. But, I am eating less these days in order to lose weight.. so that it helps me to ctb.
I feel hungry sometimes.. i just sleep.

 

[Tabbyql]

I've tried to use it in my favor in the past, but for me, my ED makes it so food and losing weight is a real reason to live. Not only that but throughout all of this, I have found out just how resilient the human body is to self destruction. A constant thought that always pulls me out of my suicidal ideation is "I can't die yet because I'm not skinny enough." So while my ED makes me want to die, it also makes me want to live to see what my body will look like if I keep doing what I'm doing.

You just read my mind.

 

[appalachian moon]

My therapist told me how eating disorders (anorexia) have a high mortality rate as a way to "scare me" but it only perked up my ears. Death, you say?
But with my ED it's a constant struggle of wanting to see myself getting at my goal weight but wanting to die bc it's so much effort + the disordered thinking torments me 24/7.

 

[Miserable]

I don't have ED, maybe I shouldn't post... but I have thought that dying that way would be... beautiful? Like really suffering for your death makes it all the more meaningful. And I'm diluted enough to think that I can have a meaningful death

 

[not_a_robot]

why do birds
suddenly appear
every time
you are near?

 

[eve2004]

I think dying FROM the ED would be painful, but being in a compromised medical state would make you more vulnerable for sure.

I've flirted with disordered eating, even now I'm not underweight but the depression is screwing with my thoughts on the subject.

So while i don't have a full blown disorder nor first hand experience being very sick, I've read about it and seen people around me with it and I just want to send you hugs and love for getting through every moment of every day tormented by this.

 

[Hel]

I've been thinking about this today. I had anorexia 2 years ago and I'm falling again. The other time my doctor controlled me because she was afraid my organd could fail. But now I will be away and without my doctor. If it wasn't painful I'd go with that method. But well, one of my main concerns is make it a natural death so if Ioose weight and I'm found with nothing in my stomach, well... It wouldn't look very natural.

 

[eve2004]

I've been thinking about this today. I had anorexia 2 years ago and I'm falling again. The other time my doctor controlled me because she was afraid my organd could fail. But now I will be away and without my doctor. If it wasn't painful I'd go with that method. But well, one of my main concerns is make it a natural death so if Ioose weight and I'm found with nothing in my stomach, well... It wouldn't look very natural.

So hard to stop once you're in the spiral. Find some support where you are going to be. The earlier the better...