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noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
5,518
This is recovery this is why I hope people could benefit from that thread. I think before someone commits suicide it would be better to open up in real life to someone. But this sounds way easier than it is. I personally had a lot of luck to have such good friends. My family did not really react in a good way though. Especially in the beginning I heard a lot of hurtful responses. Nowadays I know where we differ and what can lead to arguments. I was abused as a child from my mom and this caused my bipolar disorder. When I told my mom about my severe suicidality she even hit me so that I stop saying these words. (I can still remember the exact day for that. It was very cynical.)

I don't really know if there is something like a guide how to open up to someone about your suicidality. This is really a complex topic. I just think sometimes your mind can delude you. Sometimes depression can distort your rationality. We are just in strangers on the internet. I know remote diagnosis don't have a good reputation. We here in this forum are no psychiatrists or other doctors for somatic problems. On the internet you can only get help to a certain degree. We can't give you a diagnosis or medication. We only know the things about you that you are telling about yourself. There is the problem of intersubjectivity.
We in this forum cannot make a judgement whether your perception is distorted if the only facts we know come from you. Often only someone in real life can make this consideration. The best thing would be if the person had experience with it and would be skilled.

If there is someone you really trust it might be good idea to share your thoughts with this person. I will get a lot of responses "yeah but I had bad experiences with it". I also had bad experiences with it. I tried to get a thick skin for the hurtful responses. My usual coping mechanism is to vent in this forum about the hurtful comments. I tried to evaluate who is trustworthy enough to share my suicidal thoughts. I had enough close people so that I could choose who to trust. Here start the problems. Many in this forum are quite isolated. Their families don't give a shit and some "so-called" friends turn their back when they hear too often negative stories from you. This is at least what I have read from many members in this forum.

Personally I think it is a good idea trying to open up about your suicidality before you ctb. The question is who to trust. As I said I think people in real life can be a bigger help than some randoms on the internet who barely know you. If you have a close friend I think the first reaction is probably not that they turn their back. Though many probably don't know how to react. I more or less teached my friends what I consider as helpful responses and which sentences hurt me. Maybe it can be a learning effect for both of you when you open up to someone.

As I expressed in past threads I think if you are on the edge of suicide it is probably a good idea to talk with a professional/doctor first. Killing yourself is a huge step. This is at least my opinion. If you don't want to talk with family or friends you might can open up to a professional. There is the problem that it can take a long time to get an appoinment or that your insurance does not pay. If you can't pay for it I honestly don't have a good advice. I live in a country with a good health care system and I am priviledged for that. Maybe people from your country have a better idea how to get help. It makes me angry that there are so many in this forum who can't pay for therapy. This is truely a shame.

There is this myth I read this quite often that they would lock you immediately up in the psych ward. This only happens if you are acute suicidal. I think here in this forum many are too scared about opening up to professionals. But this is also the fault of the psychiatry. I don't think the psychiatry has a good approach how to deal with suicidal people. Though the thing is only professionals can give you the necessary medication. For some people (with mental illness) the medication really can make a huge difference. You only know it after you tried it. I tried more than 25 medication till I found something that helped me.

I am not sure to how many this thread really is helpful. There are probably a lot of people who already tried to open up to someone. But this thread is especially dedicated for people who don't know how to begin with recovery. Probably this thread does not really contain a new unique wisdom. But even if only one person can profit from it and find the courage to talk with someone and by that finding help how to recover I am glad.


Do you have a good idea for people how to start recovery? Or how they can open up to someone without getting hurt? Is there something like a guide how to reach out for someone in real life?
 
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