Discussion How difficult it is to take care of a pet?

[Electra]

Hi!
I was toying with the idea of giving a home to a pet. Most likely a cat. But I'm open to any animal. I was wondering how hard it is taking care of a pet? Have you ever had moments where it was incredibly hard due to your mental illness(es) to take care of your pet? Or maybe it was the other way around?

 

[identity0]

I found that a cat wasnt hard at all. Dogs are more work. But it is a big responsibility and limitation on what you can do simply because you have to be there for it, or have someone else to take care of it if you go anywhere. And they can potentially live for 15+ years

 

[TheHolySword]

I'm going to be honest, if you feel that you are going to CTB or that it's possible, I would not get a pet. They are a huge responsibility. You are taking care of a life, it's not like getting a house plant or something. Mental health can absolutely make it harder to care for something. It's also a huge expense. I have 2 cats and 2 dogs and they cost me a bit and take quite a lot of time and energy. You should also have a support system in place for someone to take care of them when you need or if something happens. This is definitely something you should spend time researching and not just asking a suicide forum, you're going to be responsible for a living, breathing being and you have to be certain that you are capable of more than adequate care

 

[Shadows From Hell]

One positive thing about a pet, whether it be a cat or a dog, they can be loving and supportive. It is not hard to care for them, but does require some work.

I know dogs can sense your feelings(in a way), but I'm not sure about cats.

 

[Dot]

Hi!
I was toying with the idea of giving a home to a pet. Most likely a cat. But I'm open to any animal. I was wondering how hard it is taking care of a pet? Have you ever had moments where it was incredibly hard due to your mental illness(es) to take care of your pet? Or maybe it was the other way around?

U cld alwys try fostrng whch = temprry & C hw u fnd tht

Also

Animals as Therapy - some ideas

Disclaimer: This is written by @Dot. I am just being the voice so accessible to more people. The use of animals for mental health and well-being Lots of people find animals very comforting for different reasons so we have put together a thread of different ways to access animals either online...

sanctioned-suicide.net

 

[Namelesa]

I would suggest to only do this if you are considering ctb if you have other people that live with you and want to take part in looking after your pet as it would be unfair to that animal if their only main caregiver were to leave them. I have a dog and while I am the person he likes most as I have the best play times and walks, listens to me the most and sleeps with me, my other family members take part in taking care and entertaining him which is good as my mental illnesses can make it more tough to provide him with what he wants I can feel tired in not wanting to play or walk.

However if you find walks to be something that helps with your mental health then getting a dog could be beneficial as it adds another thing to it and motivates you to walk more as your dog will want that. If you don't like the idea of having to do exercise for your pet then you can get a pet that has developed a more lazy personality instead of a pet that is still a baby and hasn't developed as much of a personality or an adult pet that is more hyper or energetic. Know if you are getting a pet that is of a young age it will take more effort and work as it gets through its early life and whatever training you need to give it.

Pets can give a sense of purpose if you like taking care of something but know about any potential things your pet is going to need and want before getting one as your low mental health may get in the way of that and that would lessen the quality of life that animal has.

 

[CatLvr]

Hi!
1. I was wondering how hard it is taking care of a pet?

2. Have you ever had moments where it was incredibly hard due to your mental illness(es) to take care of your pet?

3. Or maybe it was the other way around?

1. A lot of how "hard" a pet is to care for really depends on the pet. Dogs, cats and birds seem to me, anyway, to be a tad bit more troublesome because they are social creatures and require fairly consistent interaction from you to remain healthy, both physically and emotionally.

Fish, lizards, and turtles are not nearly as much trouble. A clean, roomy enclosure with adequate "toys" for their emotional enrichment, along with clean food and water, of course, is about all these little guys need.

2. Yes. And that is both a good and bad thing. If you have a pet it FORCES you to get up and move around a little (more for some pets than others, obviously). If you are chronically incapacitated by your condition having a pet may actually be a very good thing for you. I cannot tell you how many times I felt better during/after I cared for my pets. Sometimes they are all you need to get up, move around, "discuss 'stuff'" and just generally get a little exercise and some affection at the same time.

3. Yes, as I said above sometimes they are actually what you need. They give their affection unabashedly and if you treat them well they will be by your side until one of you passes to the next realm. I talk to my pets like they are my friends. Because they are. And they never share what I say to anyone else.

If you think you can handle the basic care and training of a dog, cat or bird, I promise you, you may be in a house all alone but you will NEVER be alone again.

 

[Hvergelmir]

I was wondering how hard it is taking care of a pet?

I thought long and hard about how to answer, and I think it boils down to how you react when you're at your lowest.

Will a dog barking and wining, forcing you out for a walk make you feel slightly better?
Will a cat chasing a toy, stepping on you, or demanding that you refill the food bowl, make you feel slightly better?
If so, a pet would do you well. If not, the experience will be mixed.

And what if they pee on the floor or destroy something? Will you be able to handle it, without violent retaliation or emotional outbursts?
They will test your patience at some point, for some reason. You must be able to handle that too.

For me the answers are yes, and tending to a pet is generally easy - easier than living alone.
Dogs are harder than cats. Some breed are much harder! There's very high variation in dogs, both in mental and physical characteristics.

 

[Pluto]

 

[ForgottenAgain]

I've owned some animals in my life for several years and also cared for some stray animals.
Taking proper care of an animal is hard work, it doesn't matter which species it is and it doesn't matter if the owner is healthy or not. Properly owning and taking care of an animal is hard work.
Unfortunately, a lot of people buy or adopt animals without doing pretty much any research on the species, which can lead to mediocre or bad care or even getting rid of the animal after some time. Please don't underestimate the amount of research needed, it is a lot.

Spoiler: Proper research and bullet list of SOME of the things you should keep in mind

If you're considering adopting an animal, I'd recommend you to first research the species you are interested in, in detail. I'd say to give at least 3 months for proper research. Please don't get your information from pet shops or pet chains, their knowledge is extremely outdated and they are obviously biased. They will say whatever they want to sell you the products they deem more profitable, with no regard for your animal's wellbeing.
Some better places to get knowledge from:

• Forums, groups, youtube channels dedicated to the husbandry of your species of interest
  • This can be a great source because the people there are unbiased, they're all wanting the best care for the animals
• Books on husbandry of the species written by vets
  • Even so, research deeply as not all vets have proper knowledge on pet care. This is especially true for exotic species (which can include pretty much anything that isn't cat, dog, rabbit)
• Local associations for the welfare of the species
  • This can also include things like RSPCA, although they're also not unbiased as, for example in the UK, a pet chain store has been working with them and since then the RSPCA removed their minimum cage size recommendations for hamsters. Why? No one knows for sure but, what we do know is that that change occurred after they started working with that pet chain store, which sells a ton of tiny horrible cages.

Don't rely on just one source of knowledge as there is misinformation everywhere. Comparing your research through all these places will help you figure out what is true and what isn't.

Some things to research are the following:

• Nutritional needs of the species
  • Are they herbivores, omnivores, carnivores? how much % of protein, fibre and fat do they need? How much water intake?
    • Cats for example, are carnivores and derive the most of their hydration from eating their prey
  • These needs vary depending on age group
• Socialization
  • Are they solitary or do they need the company of their species? e.g. cats are social animals and should have at least 1 cat friend
• Waking hours
  • Are they diurnal, nocturnal or crepuscular and does that match well with your own waking hours?
• Space requirements
  • Do you have the space required for the species? Inform yourself very well about this because, more often than not, animals need a lot more space than one imagines
  • Bare in mind the objects needed for the animal's amusement which also take space
• Enrichment
  • What kind of enrichment does the animal need?
    • This will vary wildly depending on the species but some examples of enriching activities: climbing, digging, play fighting, foraging, running, mental stimulation, etc
  • Social animals can derive a lot of enrichment from social interactions with others of the same species, solitary species on the other hand don't, so they need a lot of other enrichment like mentioned above
• Commitment
  • Are you prepared to give this animal their forever home? Are you prepared for how long they will live for?
    • Owning a cat is a very long commitment since they can live up to 20 years
  • Are you prepared to take care of them no matter your current mental state?
    • E.g. you may have gone through a terrible thing but the animal needs their poops cleaned, fresh water, fresh food, grooming, etc and you must do it as it is your obligation as the owner
  • Is your life situation stable enough? Do you have an emergency fund that can cover your expenses and the animal's in case of job loss or any other misfortune for a couple of months?
  • Do you rent and, if so, how hard would it be if you had to move to another rented place with your pet?
    • In the UK it is very hard to rent with dogs and cats for example
  • Are you prepared for your animal to destroy potentially expensive objects in your house?
• Health and Behaviour
  • An animal can't tell you when they're sick or doing poorly, it is your responsibility as the owner to:
    • Be fluent in their body language
    • Know their basic anatomy
    • Pay close attention to any changes in behaviour, weight, appearance, etc
    • Perform basic health checks regularly (e.g. every week or 2 weeks depending on the species)
  • Are you prepared to spend potentially a lot of money at the vet?
    • Vet bills can be quite expensive and taking the animal to the vet shouldn't be negotiable. It is a living being that has the right to be properly treated for, it is your responsibility as the owner to have the money for it
    • You can consider vet insurance for this
• Death
  • Are you prepared for the passing of your animal?
    • No matter the lifespan of the species, the passing of an animal is a heart breaking moment that causes a lot of pain
    • If you're considering a species with a short lifespan, please think about this even more
  • Consider how impactful this may be on you prior to getting the animal

Spoiler: My personal experience of negligence when owning a cat

I've owned cats and hamsters for several years in my life and I want to share with you a bad experience that costed me my cat's life, and this was due to my parents and my own negligence and severe lack of research.

---

My past cat - kidney cancer, negligence

I had a cat for several years, my parents got her because they thought cats were cute and I was a cat lover. I was a child/tween when we got her. Her nutrition was basically kibble, all the time, from the supermarket. We lived in a flat and she would get bored easily and cause chaos at home so we got her another cat, her sister.
Some years went by and my mother was tired of the cats because they were constantly scratching the carpets and ruining the curtains. No matter what we did, they always preferred to scratch the carpet. At some point there was acceptance that the carpet was always going to look ugly.

Several years went by and my cat would puke from time to time. I would tell my parents to take her to the vet but they didn't want to - they would say the vet was too expensive, that "it's just a cat", etc. Then one day, years later, my cat vomited blood and so I grabbed all the money I saved from birthdays, etc, and took her to the vet. She had kidney cancer and was terminal. She was also skinnier than usual and weirdly bloated, which I never noticed because I was severely depressed, taking meds, etc.
My cat's behaviour had changed months prior, her breath was very stinky but none of this I noticed.

My cat was put to sleep 1 week later. Her terrible diet caused that cancer. She could have lived another 5 or 8 years if it wasn't for my parents horrible standards and my own negligence. I have never and will never forgive myself.

If you've read up to this point, thank you, I hope I haven't overwhelmed you too much or discouraged you... I just want you to know the reality of what is needed to provide good care to an animal. It is very easy to go out, buy an animal, buy the supplies you see at the store and off you go, but the reality is that you may very well be buying the wrong things and providing mediocre care to your pet. It is very easy to provide bad care and even buy things that are harmful to the animal.

You wouldn't believe the amount of things being sold at pet stores that are deadly... one example is the cotton "fluffy" bedding for hamsters which have caused several deaths through lost limbs, ingestion problems, etc. There is a whole page dedicated to this at HamsterWelfare.com and even though the Blue Cross, Wikipedia, RSPCA, PSA all urge that this bedding is unsafe and customers have made complaints to the retailers and posted reviews, this product is still being sold today.

Owning an animal can be a very rewarding experience, I love animals and can't imagine myself living without them alongside me. There are a lot of great things about animals which I think you can see everywhere on the web so please don't be discouraged by my post. I just want to highlight what is rarely talked about and taken for granted.

 

[yousaidimsweet]

like everyone else has been saying on here, if you're going to CTB then do not get a pet. that aside though, cats are definitely less work than dogs. if you're adopting a kitten, that will be much more work though than an adult cat as they'll want to play around with you more often. and who knows? that might encourage you to get out of bed in the morning as it does for me. most of the day adult cats just sleep and wake to eat or play/stare at you. before getting a cat though just make sure you weigh the pros and cons

 

[EvisceratedJester]

They can be pretty difficult to take care of. The kind of pet I have is a particularly demanding one. He requires a very specific diet, needs to be washed quite frequently (especially after we go out), has broken my things on multiple different occasions while playing or when angry, and so on. The worst part is that people don't take me seriously when I vent about my difficulties with raising him. They always give me weird looks, especially when they find out about him being a rock. They always say shit like, "Why do you have a pet rock? Aren't you too old for that? Are you crazy or something?" And other judgemental shit. Even vets don't take me seriously. It took me visiting seven different vets until I found one who was willing to actually take a look at him. My poor little Rocky never asked to be born this way and it breaks my heart how nobody takes his well-being seriously. Sometimes, he'll say things to me in the middle of the night like, "Help me! Please, help me bring an end to this curse!" And other times I'll hear him sobbing about how he used to have a family and about some evil sorcerer. I think he might be suffering from psychosis...

Honestly, I'd recommend against getting a rock as a pet. They're cute but they are a lot of work and the stigma surrounding it is not worth dealing with.

 

[Hvergelmir]

...so please don't be discouraged by my post.

That's a pretty overwhelming list. Better safe than sorry, but I wanted to put a more reassuring twist on it anyway.
There are a lot of animals that really could use an owner, and a lot of people that would do better with a pet. I don't want the bar of entry to seem impossibly high.

I don't think it's feasible to confidently tick all those boxes.
'Be fluent in their body language' is something that for example takes practical experience - arguably years of it.

When we're talking about common domesticated cats and dogs, society is build around it and knowledge is widespread.
Vets have experience with them, store bought food is generally specifically manufactured for the species, and the animal have evolved to coexist with humans in human living conditions.

Speak to other owners when you know what species you're interested in, to get an idea of the practical implications and common mistakes related to keeping the pet. Think about long term commitment and worst case contingencies. But above all, be observant and don't postpone consulting a vet is something seem off. Get insurance if your economical situation requires it.

I could write a book on the subject, but want to keep it short. Books are good though - get one targeting first time owners - one that focus on the essentials.

 

[CatLvr]

I thought of something just now -- I have dogs, cats, chickens and an aquarium right now. And I take care of all of them. But ...

I also have a buttload of houseplants that require care and attention, also. They are not pets in the traditional sense, of course, but they ARE all of same things pets are to me. And they don't poop or pee places I don't want them go, they don't get whiny or die if I forget to feed them some evening -- in fact I only have to feed them a couple, 3 times a year -- and they don't need vaccinations, neutering, training (ok, maybe a little here and there if their tendrils wander a bit).

Seriously though, plants are kinda in that happy place where you can take care of them and they still die on ya, or you can be amazed at just how much neglect and still survive! And yes, I talk to my plants while I care for them, or brush their leaves -- and I do "play" with them every day, some days longer than others. Tomorrow some "babies" I bought are ready for some fresh soil and pots. Just like kids and "real" pets.

 

[charcoalcat]

You'll get used to the taking care part, it becomes a routine. Vet bills will be a factor so make sure you have spare funds set aside. The hardest part will be the final days of your pet. My dog passed 3 yrs ago and I still weep occasionally when I look at her videos.

 

[next2n0thing]

i started keeping a beta fish back in october. the only stressful part of the process was cycling the tank, took about 3-ish weeks i wanna say? but thats my fault since i bought the fish on a whim before doing thorough research lol. it's been pretty chill so far, feeding him in the AM/PM and a weekly water change gives me a small routine to do. whenever im feeling anxious, watching him swim around the plants or through his lava rock cave usually calms me down.

 

[8leveloquenfrn4evr8]

Cats can be extremely sensitive even if it isn't always obvious.

 

[Loaf of bread]

Others have already mentioned this, but very important so I will reiterate - If one intends to CTB, do not get a pet! The implicatons of pets after ctb or pets inhibiting ctb are highly problematic!

To answer your question, pets are generally quite hard work and should not be underestimated. Of course it does vary on the animal.

Note that pets are sentient beings - if stuff goes wrong there will be suffering as a consequence. As such the responsibility of pet ownership is high.

Pets are also limiting - you may have problems leaving them alone, or have to tend to their needs often which interferes with errands and social life.

Pets can bring immense reward and joy but also burden and responsibility. It is up to individuals to determine whether it is worthwile or not.

Since most pets live years or decades, this decision must be thoroughly considered and must not be taken lightly.

 

[LukaParrot]

Electra, first, thanks for liking my dark jokes....

I'm going to be honest with you, If you're really depressed, pets became a burden to take care.

If depression is your problem, I think most depressed people have their reasons why they reach at this point. If your problems have a solution, getting a pet really helps a lot.

I didnt want to get a cat or a dog, well, cats... do you need to clean the sandbox and...no thanks, dogs you have to take a walk everyday if possible.

The same way pets can help you to get better, it depends on your burden on depression.

I decided to have fishes, kissing gouramis . They're lovely, (not because the kissing = fight)... then I got some birds, four society finches and to see their babies was so cool to me and they're very easy to take care. It didnt solve my problems but made my days more tolerant.

I hope you can find a answer and decide by yourself.

 

[LukaParrot]

I wanna share a little with you.
PS: You cant clean the nest when they're too small.. parents may feel your smell and not take care...

fishes

Image fishes hosted in Freeimage.host

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birds1

Image birds1 hosted in Freeimage.host

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birds2

Image birds2 hosted in Freeimage.host

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birds3

Image birds3 hosted in Freeimage.host

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[PikedMan]

I would get rats as they don't live long and are very easy to take care of.

 

[InversedShadow]

Cats just initially take a lot of effort, later it becomes both easier and more relaxing and fun :) dogs do require lots of energy and attention and effort! but they can become irreplacable companions wherever you go! of course cats as well, however they seem to be bigger loners than the dogs! but of course there are somereally loving cats too!
When it comes to the least amount of effort needed surely fishes are the easiest to take care of, but well, they are very limited! Those are typical animals, but there is plenty more, and I just have had to deal with these, so that's as much as I can tell!