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MaskedSparrow

MaskedSparrow

Member
Aug 4, 2023
8
Hi! I'm not sure if I'm formatting this post correctly. I was disfigured from birth. I don't mean like "ohhh i'm not pretty i'm so deformed" I mean it's an actual noticeable medical deformation of my face. My jaw is big on one side and small on the other, my chin isn't visible, one of my ears didn't form properly, etc. I don't want to specify the name of the disorder as to not reveal too much personal information. This is a big reason as to why I'm considering suicide.

I don't leave my room anymore because I can't bear it when someone sees me. I don't get bullied, but I think that's because I avoid everyone whenever possible. This is not in my head, many people have called me ugly. I know I am, obviously. Whenever I visit a doctor, they usually ask about it, and I tell them about my condition. I don't want to be angry, but I think I hate this? I wish I could wear a medical mask to school, but my parents won't let me. Or at least they're very adamant that I don't. I wish that disliking defected people wasn't a biological mechanism. Please, if anyone has any advice, tell me. Thank you!
 
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carac

carac

Banned
May 27, 2023
1,117
Are you part of any support networks for people with your condition or facial disfigurement like yourself? If not it might be a good idea to try and connect with people in the same position as you are. Also it's perfectly normal for you to be angry and frustrated about this and ask why me? so vent as much as you like you are among understanding people here
 
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mia.wallace

mia.wallace

Fell on black days
Feb 1, 2023
768
Hello @MaskedSparrow - I'm so sorry you've been struggling. I agree that it could be beneficial to seek out support.. sometimes it just helps to feel like you're not alone.

I don't know where you live but in the UK, there's an organization called Changing Faces, which helps people living with all sorts of visual differences. They offer support, guidance and resources. Might be worthwhile checking out. If you don't live in the UK, perhaps they could refer you to a similar organization where you live. Sending you a big hug x
 
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MaskedSparrow

MaskedSparrow

Member
Aug 4, 2023
8
Are you part of any support networks for people with your condition or facial disfigurement like yourself? If not it might be a good idea to try and connect with people in the same position as you are. Also it's perfectly normal for you to be angry and frustrated about this and ask why me? so vent as much as you like you are among understanding people here
Hi, thank you! I'm not part of any support networks. I wouldn't even know where to start to be honest. I'm horribly anxious when speaking to people as well xD. And I almost feel anxious that my disfigurement isn't severe enough to join one.
 
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Zegers

Zegers

Enlightened
Dec 15, 2021
1,761
as someone with a severe physical disability i don't know how, i can only say that it has taken over me with anxiety, insecurity and complexes.

Best wishes
 
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carac

carac

Banned
May 27, 2023
1,117
Hi, thank you! I'm not part of any support networks. I wouldn't even know where to start to be honest. I'm horribly anxious when speaking to people as well xD. And I almost feel anxious that my disfigurement isn't severe enough to join one.
I definitely think you would benefit from connecting with people going through the same thing as yourself. Maybe ask your doctor about it. I know Facebook can be a bit crap but they have groups on there for almost anything you don't have to even interact if you dont want to, just find a group and lurk in it for a bit and see how you feel. The best thing would be to go out a met people like yourself in the real world but I would guess that's a bit of a stretch but you can always start small with online stuff.
 
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