Bunnymmm
Member
- Aug 29, 2022
- 40
Hello, after some thinking I realize that I need to be alone and happy with myself before pursuing a relationship. Any advice on how to do that?
tooBadTooLate
Member
- Aug 16, 2025
- 54
Getting into hobbies and self-studying subjects seemed to help me. Maybe learn a new language, like, say, German—I've heard that it's the easiest language to learn for an English speaker.
starinthesky
twinkling star
- Aug 13, 2025
- 44
Hobbies are about the only thing keeping me from losing my mind, also the only thing I have confidence in. In some occasions all that focus makes you forget or disregard negativity, but it's hard to be consistent. It works great too if you want to meet people through it
amerie
an earthworm sprinkled with salt
- Oct 6, 2024
- 867
Heal from your abandonment trauma. A need to be saved by a partner is usually caused by being rejected or neglected emotionally during childhood and wanting a Prince Charming to save you from yourself and tell you everything you want to hear.
And become confident in yourself, find a hobby with a lot of rigor like guitar or body building and become really good at it, you'll start liking yourself because you've challenged yourself into doing hard things.
Also learn radical self acceptance maybe? I think that will help you stop caring about how you look.
And become confident in yourself, find a hobby with a lot of rigor like guitar or body building and become really good at it, you'll start liking yourself because you've challenged yourself into doing hard things.
Also learn radical self acceptance maybe? I think that will help you stop caring about how you look.
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As stated above, you need to be ok with yourself first. By that I mean generally. We all have flaws and we all have things we need to work on, but you should be generally comfortable in your own skin. If there are things about yourself you do not like, work on them.
Next, be comfortable doing things alone. I big confidence boost for me came when I started going to movies and restaurants by myself. Society has this unspoken rule that you HAVE to do things with someone else and it is just plain untrue. I had a "date night" with myself and it was amazing.
Third, as others have said, get hobbies. Find a way to entertain yourself while no one else is there. This can also help with the two above points. You might also find someone else who shares a hobby interest and start a friendship there.
Next, be comfortable doing things alone. I big confidence boost for me came when I started going to movies and restaurants by myself. Society has this unspoken rule that you HAVE to do things with someone else and it is just plain untrue. I had a "date night" with myself and it was amazing.
Third, as others have said, get hobbies. Find a way to entertain yourself while no one else is there. This can also help with the two above points. You might also find someone else who shares a hobby interest and start a friendship there.
Niron1492
pew pew ;>
- Aug 28, 2025
- 46
I assume you are not schizoid so you dont feel well being alone? (Apologize if im wrong)
I also had a hard time to accept it,crying alot and feeling isolated.Over time,when i started reading(or any other hobby as people say,but i found reading easy since its comforting though also hanging out on forums,if discord is too overwhelming like how it is for me,video games,drawing if thats easy for you),but when i started reading it got easier to just dissociate from the world,im also watching fantasy/historical tv shows and just putting myself in an other world,having an other personality(not sure if this is the right word but you know how you got a character in dnd and you really love it?Or an OC in a fanfiction,that sort of personality if you understand).
And i just love daydreaming and being in that body rather than in the real world,i found it very healing.I know i think i just repeated the same thing as the others,but i just suggested to you some easy hobbies.Now,through reading and knowing more lore,you could meet in fanclubs or such,and meet other people which you may find someone that you already share something in common with.
I have lost hope for myself but i wish for you to have great luck whatever you do :> This is just some easier advice i guess if you dont know on what hobby to pursue so you could find a relationship,well obviously dont force someone into it but you could meet good friends there which some can evolve into a potential relationship.
I also had a hard time to accept it,crying alot and feeling isolated.Over time,when i started reading(or any other hobby as people say,but i found reading easy since its comforting though also hanging out on forums,if discord is too overwhelming like how it is for me,video games,drawing if thats easy for you),but when i started reading it got easier to just dissociate from the world,im also watching fantasy/historical tv shows and just putting myself in an other world,having an other personality(not sure if this is the right word but you know how you got a character in dnd and you really love it?Or an OC in a fanfiction,that sort of personality if you understand).
And i just love daydreaming and being in that body rather than in the real world,i found it very healing.I know i think i just repeated the same thing as the others,but i just suggested to you some easy hobbies.Now,through reading and knowing more lore,you could meet in fanclubs or such,and meet other people which you may find someone that you already share something in common with.
I have lost hope for myself but i wish for you to have great luck whatever you do :> This is just some easier advice i guess if you dont know on what hobby to pursue so you could find a relationship,well obviously dont force someone into it but you could meet good friends there which some can evolve into a potential relationship.
