I literally have no social skills at all. My psychiatrist wants me to start conversations with people lol. How does that even work??? I sit in a room with people in silence all day.
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selfhater
Experienced
- Mar 1, 2020
- 222
same, i'm silent all the time and when i try to open a conversation it's so so difficult even trying to keep it going, literally all i say is "oh" as an expression for everything
Brink
Exhausted. RadHomo.
- Feb 11, 2020
- 625
Have you tried meeting up with people who share an interest/hobby with you? There's meetup websites dedicated to that sort of thing. Conversations might flow easier if it's based around something that's pre-set.
Marktheghost
Paragon
- Feb 20, 2020
- 911
This might be a case of the blind leading the blind, as I'm rubbish at social skills myself, but "Hi, how are you?" is probably a good start. You could ask them what they've been doing recently. Ask them questions about themselves, tell them a bit about you. See if you've got any common interests, and if so talk to them about whatever the common interest is. Talk about what's happening in the news. Talk about things that are particularly relevant to the time of year, eg Christmas in December, or holidays in the summer. If all else fails, you can always talk to them about the weather. There's lots of things you could talk about.
Think about conversation topics before the social event. From small talk to current events. If you don't know how to start a conversation, giving a compliment(not too over the top) usually works. Compliments, ask questions to show interest, slip in some info about yourself(gives them the chance to ask you questions) and keep going.
That usually does the trick
That usually does the trick
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I've never really had issues with socialising and making friends. Maybe it's because I'm quite extroverted. So perhaps I can help.
First of all don't worry about impressing anyone or seeming awkward. Just be yourself.
If you see someone who catches your eye because you like their hair or a particular feature about them, approach them and let them know. You will probably make their day and it will be genuine as well. If it leads to a conversation then great, and if not then at least it will make you more confident to approach people. This is just one of many ways to approach someone.
It is much easier if you are somewhere where people share hobbies or interests as you will have a lot to bond over very quickly.
Also your body language says a lot. If you a more slumped and closed off, then people will not approach you either. Even just smiling at someone can make a big difference (obviously depends on the situation). If your body language shows you are approachable then it will make this easier.
Try to be more proactive with making plans and meeting up. If you have a great conversation and you like each other, make sure to get their number and offer to get them a coffee some time (for example). Also try to make it happen as it's easy to slowly drift away from friends.
The hardest part is gaining confidence in yourself.The more people you approach the easier it gets and you will gain these social skills quickly. You will feel out of your comfort zone at first but then it comes more naturally.
First of all don't worry about impressing anyone or seeming awkward. Just be yourself.
If you see someone who catches your eye because you like their hair or a particular feature about them, approach them and let them know. You will probably make their day and it will be genuine as well. If it leads to a conversation then great, and if not then at least it will make you more confident to approach people. This is just one of many ways to approach someone.
It is much easier if you are somewhere where people share hobbies or interests as you will have a lot to bond over very quickly.
Also your body language says a lot. If you a more slumped and closed off, then people will not approach you either. Even just smiling at someone can make a big difference (obviously depends on the situation). If your body language shows you are approachable then it will make this easier.
Try to be more proactive with making plans and meeting up. If you have a great conversation and you like each other, make sure to get their number and offer to get them a coffee some time (for example). Also try to make it happen as it's easy to slowly drift away from friends.
The hardest part is gaining confidence in yourself.The more people you approach the easier it gets and you will gain these social skills quickly. You will feel out of your comfort zone at first but then it comes more naturally.
