How many have a method ready but have no intention of taking action at the moment?

[Placo]

I was initially thinking of SN but in the end it is valid for all methods, how many have a method in the drawer ready but have no intention of killing themselves at the moment? In my case I have SN literally in the drawer but at the moment I would first like to try some other remedy for depression before killing myself.

 

[Blueberry Panic]

I have ways to go at anytime but it hasn't gotten bad enough for me to want to do anything just yet.

 

[SchrodingerIsDed]

I was initially thinking of SN but in the end it is valid for all methods, how many have a method in the drawer ready but have no intention of killing themselves at the moment? In my case I have SN literally in the drawer but at the moment I would first like to try some other remedy for depression before killing myself.

I have all the materials needed. I just need meto, really. Then I'm GTG. The only thing is yeah SI is a bitch, and there's no real mandate for me to do it ASAP. It usually requires an emotional trigger, right, something to severe that it makes you feel like you have to do it then and there, SI be damned.

So when I get the final materials. I'm also going to make it into a kit, that way it's easy to take. Not just the material sitting in the drawer, but ALL the materials needed in the specific order they're needed, already broken down to their most consumable form (barring stability issues like sn in water).

Then, when it's time, I'll drink some alcohol, just enough to get emotions flowing freely hopefully that won't interfere with sn but prolly will make me more likely to vomit, but then I'll play sad music, and I'll reflect on the worst points of my life, the worst points that are bound to occur in the future, and my worst mistakes, until the depression and sadness and fear grow so palpable that I have no choice but to take the already prepared substances.

Then shoot myself in the heart, twice, if possible. Not taking any chances. Plus I think attacking my heart is romantic. The world never took my breath away. It only destroyed my heart.

Ironically this might also be the reverse script for surviving suicidal thoughts. Just focus on the good shit. If it's all about emotional regulation.

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

My ligature is already made and is just chilling on my bookshelf for when it feels right.

 

[Kbeau]

I was initially thinking of SN but in the end it is valid for all methods, how many have a method in the drawer ready but have no intention of killing themselves at the moment? In my case I have SN literally in the drawer but at the moment I would first like to try some other remedy for depression before killing myself.

What have you tried for treating depression? Because there are things well beyond anti-depressants, like ECT, Ketamine infusion therapy, etc

 

[Placo]

What have you tried for treating depression? Because there are things well beyond anti-depressants, like ECT, Ketamine infusion therapy, etc

Many types of psychotropic drugs including both antidepressants and low-dose antipsychotics.

I have also tried esketamine for a few months now.

Now the hope is more for MAOIs which are more dangerous but also more powerful.

 

[Kbeau]

Many types of psychotropic drugs including both antidepressants and low-dose antipsychotics.

I have also tried esketamine for a few months now.

Now the hope is more for MAOIs which are more dangerous but also more powerful.

Yeah, MAOIs are definitely getting to the bottom of shit to try. Sorry for your pain

 

[divinemistress36]

Yes , sn and meds for it in closet for when I get the balls one day

 

[LittleNelson]

I have my SN safely stored away. I think I've always known that someday I would end my life but I feel like I can't right now. My mother is ill and I'm the only one who can take care of her.

 

[davidtorez]

My N has been in the fridge since 2018. The more the years go on, the more physically crippled I'm getting with my osteoarthritis and tendonosis in my most of my joints. This year may be my year but who knows? Got the meto and ondansetron ready too. Just need the courage .

 

[onthefence]

I have what I think I need but am not 100% confident in my method. I also can't leave because it would leave a person in a really bad situation. I'm starting to feel like being selfish though and just checking out anyway.

 

[blackIronPrison]

I thought I was ready but evidently I'm not else I think I would have succeeded already. I don't have anything I'm waiting for, no dependents or anything like that, I don't have much guilt around family members feeling grief (idc if that makes me a bad person). Honestly I think I may just be afraid. Only time will tell ig.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I've had everything ready for 2 years now but, I'm waiting for my Dad to go first. Really, I want to prepare a backup method also but, I can't settle on what.

 

[timorousTruant]

I have SN and meto stashed away, but right now I'm still at the stage of trying to overcome SI. I didn't realize how scared I'd truly be until I actually had a method readily available to take any time.

 

[wiggy]

I'm motivated by external circumstances, so I won't do anything until I have to.

 

[Dante_]

In my case I have SN literally in the drawer

Yeap same, SN, Bisoprolol, Meto, Xanax and painkillers etc...

 

[Soontocatch]

I have everything ready and I basically am waiting for the right time,so that if it does fail it doesn't ruin my life to a point that I can't recover out of.

 

[dead dav]

Plan ready hanging

 

[XdragonsoulX]

Got my rope hidden away I hope I never have to use it but I feel it's close

 

[JesiBel]

I also have all the materials ready. A month ago I bought the rope, I have already written some letters, I saved money, I left a piece of fabric ready to cover my face, now everything is in my closet waiting for the moment.

 

[meso]

the method is ready

instructions, cleaning my life etc will be done the month before ctb

the waiting is exhausting, i never planned a 100% chosen and 80% efficient CTB, for 3 months i'll be facing death, i will talk to loved ones about future even tho i already know i'm going, i feel like a ghost

 

[KillingPain267]

I was initially thinking of SN but in the end it is valid for all methods, how many have a method in the drawer ready but have no intention of killing themselves at the moment? In my case I have SN literally in the drawer but at the moment I would first like to try some other remedy for depression before killing myself.

Totally same. I'm in the process of buying SN and meto and a little safety box to store it in. That'll give me more peace. And then I am about to switch antidepressives to try something new. I also found a guy in Telegram who sells illegal handguns, but it sounds tol risky. If it's not a setup, having one and storing it sounds so cool, but even then I won't have peace because the cops might come looking for it if the seller gets arrested, because they want the hardware off the street. Or what, do you think I should take the risk and buy it and store it? I can't get the thought out of my head.

 

[Pluto]

 

[deadbidaylight]

My method of choice is hanging, so I have the means whenever I wanted to follow through with it. I own my house so I don't have to worry about roommates or parents etc (yay old!). I could literally do it tonight if I wanted to.

I am actively trying not to because of my child. I really don't WANT to die. I feel like I do, but I know I don't actually want to leave her or my family. I'm terrified of impulsively trying it out and actually dying by mistake, so I won't even attempt to see what it feels like.

Although I'm horribly depressed and suicidal and have been for years, I'm trying to make a difference being on here by being a support for folks that really need it. I'm not here to talk anyone out of it, I want to make a difference even if it's during their final minutes on earth. I want people to feel support and love regardless of their situation. That's what's keeping me going.

 

[outrider567]

Nitrogen set up ready to go for 2.5 years now, I'm just meandering around, living a life in slow motion, never really looking forward to anything, tired of getting tears in my eyes thinking of her death, tired now of a lot of things.....

 

[cooked825]

I have everything for SN ready except for anti nausea and hotel room booking the 1 percent stopping me is what it will do to loved ones that have stuck by me through a tough life but more so a very tough 4 years… so hard nearly booked hotel room yesterday but it's inevitable…

 

[uta]

I do and I'd like to acquire more options, but don't plan on attempting anytime soon because of family

 

[Outofoptions1]

My N has been in the fridge since 2018. The more the years go on, the more physically crippled I'm getting with my osteoarthritis and tendonosis in my most of my joints. This year may be my year but who knows? Got the meto and ondansetron ready too. Just need the courage .

How old are you if you don't mind me asking. I'm 32 and terrified of my joint pain becoming worse

 

[davidtorez]

How old are you if you don't mind me asking. I'm 32 and terrified of my joint pain becoming worse

I'm 43. My joint issues started in my late 30s . Osteoarthritis and tendonosis in most of my joints from being overly active in my 20s and 30s, martial arts and weight lifting mostly. So what's your story , if you don't mind me asking ?

 

[SWATKATS]

My N has been in the fridge since 2018. The more the years go on, the more physically crippled I'm getting with my osteoarthritis and tendonosis in my most of my joints. This year may be my year but who knows? Got the meto and ondansetron ready too. Just need the courage .

Sorry to hear about your struggle, my body is beginning to break down as well. I barely can make it out the front door. Even just laying in bed causes my legs to burn. Just a year ago I was very active, with no issues. Unfortunately,, no one's sure what is causing my neuropathy and as time passes it becomes irreversible. I wish could walk into a clinic that offers voluntary assisted dying.