Help How to suppress emotions when talking to someone?

[leviant123]

Hey everyone, nothing close to a vent just a question. What I'm trying to say here is how do I stop my emotions from being read while I talk. People tend to notice I am not feeling well when I talk, I have issues that are behind surface level and I do not wish to talk about them with people who know me personally. Not saying I want to do nothing about my problems but I don't want people knowing something is wrong. For example, just now I was on the phone with someone and I was really quiet because there was a lot going through my mind, and I couldn't talk about my day because well, I've been on this site all day and the other thing I did was eat and play with my dog. They already heard that so then they asked "you've been so quiet what's wrong?" I've told them some surface level things but they are tired of hearing my issues and interrupt me when I do mention them. This happens or either people will start to get mad at me because I am feeling down(they'll mistake my sadness for attitude). THEREFORE, I need someone to tell me how in the heck am I supposed to suppress my emotions from being shown, especially the silence that comes with me feeling sad. Better yet, how to distract my mind from my thoughts only while talking to someone :). I appreciate any response

 

[abchia]

You could try continuing to ask them stuff about themselves? Not sure what else because it seems like being quiet raises suspicions. It's gonna be draining though

 

[leviant123]

You could try continuing to ask them stuff about themselves? Not sure what else because it seems like being quiet raises suspicions. It's gonna be draining though

True, I'll just do that maybe thank you :)

 

[Widdershins]

This works better if you're actually hanging out with someone and not over the phone. But doing something else with them while talking, like playing a game or watching a movie. And what I do if I feel like I'm about to burst into tears is put my tongue on my roof of my mouth. For some weird reason it helps. You could also say you're tired or have a sore throat or something to justify being quiet.

 

[leviant123]

This works better if you're actually hanging out with someone and not over the phone. But doing something else with them while talking, like playing a game or watching a movie. And what I do if I feel like I'm about to burst into tears is put my tongue on my roof of my mouth. For some weird reason it helps. You could also say you're tired or have a sore throat or something to justify being quiet.

aight i appreciate it thanks!

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Wear a face mask. Just pretend you're a little bit sick and don't want to spread what you've got. It's way more difficult for people to read your emotions if half your face is obscured. You might also have to work on making your eyelids unreadable and keeping your voice neutral too but ultimately a mask makes it really easy to hide your emotions.

 

[Aergia]

When this happens to me I always just apologise and brush it aside by saying I'm tired. Maybe throw in a line about how you didn't get much sleep the night before. Then change the subject.

either people will start to get mad at me because I am feeling down(they'll mistake my sadness for attitude)

I'd say something like, "sorry if I seem snappy, I'm just tired at the moment."

 

[4everHeartBroken]

Hey everyone, nothing close to a vent just a question. What I'm trying to say here is how do I stop my emotions from being read while I talk. People tend to notice I am not feeling well when I talk, I have issues that are behind surface level and I do not wish to talk about them with people who know me personally. Not saying I want to do nothing about my problems but I don't want people knowing something is wrong. For example, just now I was on the phone with someone and I was really quiet because there was a lot going through my mind, and I couldn't talk about my day because well, I've been on this site all day and the other thing I did was eat and play with my dog. They already heard that so then they asked "you've been so quiet what's wrong?" I've told them some surface level things but they are tired of hearing my issues and interrupt me when I do mention them. This happens or either people will start to get mad at me because I am feeling down(they'll mistake my sadness for attitude). THEREFORE, I need someone to tell me how in the heck am I supposed to suppress my emotions from being shown, especially the silence that comes with me feeling sad. Better yet, how to distract my mind from my thoughts only while talking to someone :). I appreciate any response

There's absolutely NOTHING WRONG with being a quiet person (I'm also telling myself this as I type!). You don't have to tell anyone ANYTHING, especially what's going on in YOUR OWN mind and thoughts. Don't let other people's traumas get to you. If someone gets mad at you because THEY mistaken YOUR PERSONAL SADNESS for "attitude" towards them, then that's a problem for THEM to solve, not you! As a human being, you are ALLOWED to be your quiet self! In general, quiet people are actually better listeners, but even if you're about to cry and can't listen to someone talk, that is NOT for them to try to figure out or be nosey about. It took me many years to get used to being comfortable in my own silence around others. I prefer to sit comfortably with someone in silence with someone who can do the same than to listen to someone talk about themselves for an hour. Silence can feel intimate to some people and intimacy can be intimidating to some people. I believe it actually scares some people who aren't comfortable shutting their mouths!

 

[leviant123]

There's absolutely NOTHING WRONG with being a quiet person (I'm also telling myself this as I type!). You don't have to tell anyone ANYTHING, especially what's going on in YOUR OWN mind and thoughts. Don't let other people's traumas get to you. If someone gets mad at you because THEY mistaken YOUR PERSONAL SADNESS for "attitude" towards them, then that's a problem for THEM to solve, not you! As a human being, you are ALLOWED to be your quiet self! In general, quiet people are actually better listeners, but even if you're about to cry and can't listen to someone talk, that is NOT for them to try to figure out or be nosey about. It took me many years to get used to being comfortable in my own silence around others. I prefer to sit comfortably with someone in silence with someone who can do the same than to listen to someone talk about themselves for an hour. Silence can feel intimate to some people and intimacy can be intimidating to some people. I believe it actually scares some people who aren't comfortable shutting their mouths!

you are so right thank you for that response, plus like they'd get mad and all when i wouldn't tell them, like why get mad at me not telling you what's going on but interrupt when i do?? weird world out there. you a real one fr

 

[4everHeartBroken]

you are so right thank you for that response, plus like they'd get mad and all when i wouldn't tell them, like why get mad at me not telling you what's going on but interrupt when i do?? weird world out there. you a real one fr

…and you are just being real too, even when you are "quiet". You don't owe ANYONE an explanation as to why you don't want to talk to someone. They are YOUR personal thoughts, YOUR feelings and YOUR own body and mind and YOU get to choose whether or not you want to share. I believe some people have good intentions and truly do care while others are just nosey and try to cross other people's boundaries.

 

[leviant123]

…and you are just being real too, even when you are "quiet". You don't owe ANYONE an explanation as to why you don't want to talk to someone. They are YOUR personal thoughts, YOUR feelings and YOUR own body and mind and YOU get to choose whether or not you want to share. I believe some people have good intentions and truly do care while others are just nosey and try to cross other people's boundaries.

YESS, and sometimes you can tell when it's those nosy people, especially when they don't even acknowledge, i like you girl!