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lawlietsph

lawlietsph

can we be done here
May 6, 2023
208
I fucking hate people to be honest.
But I also crave them.
People are horrible.
They use, manipulate, gaslight you into thinking there's something wrong with you.
You swallow all your needs, because it bothers them. You completely change your personality, just so they will stay.
And when I finally have enough and lash out, I am labeled as a crazy complaining bitch.

I hate smartphones. I've met many people this way, all of them broke me into pieces. It's fucking stupid, they can write me things - anything they want.
And when it hurts me, I can't do anything about it. They are not here, I can't yell at them. So what happens is I stay alone with all my anger. It destroys me, it's causing me sleepless fucking nights, tears, deep pain, and I can't do anything about it. And they don't give a shit.

All the people I thought will be part of my life somehow, they all destroyed me and had zero remorse.

I'm empty and done. So done with this fucking disgusting life. And people treating each other like crap. There is not a single relationship in my entire life that didn't cause me unspeakable pain.
I don't want to talk to humans anymore. But then what's the fucking point? Why would I live one minute longer?

My head is a huge mess. I am empty, but still so fucking angry. Everything hurts. Seeing, hearing, feeling, breathing, everything hurts so fucking much. And I am full of rage.
I hate that we speak, text on these fucking phones. Because when something bad happens, you are left alone with all of your deep anger. Left alone to figure out how the fuck are you going to get through another heartbreak again. AGAIN. You can't scream at the other person's face, you can't scream how much he hurt you and how much he fucking made you want to slit your throat with a kitchen knife.
It's not that they give a shit anyway.
People are horrible.
I am no different.
I have to die, just fucking die, nobody gives a shit anyway, I am only good for being used and being manipulated.
Punching my own head is not enough punishment anymore. I need to fucking die, to lit myself on fire.
I wanted to do it with sn or by partial hanging.

The hell with those.

I need to fucking burn alive, maybe then I won't feel this excruciating pain in my fucking brain and soul. Shoot me, shoot my stupid skull so it's breaking into billions of pieces, spit on my corpse, destroy it with an axe, cut me, cut my flesh until it's becoming one with the earth, feed me to the dogs and bears, make me non existent, scream at my ugly remains, scream from the top of your lungs just how much of a fucking nobody I am, tell me how fucking ugly and disgusting my whole existence is, that I am nothing but a stupid fat bitch, worthless and only good for using and abusing.

The pain. The pain is unbearable. I want to rip out my eyeballs, rip out my brain, my heart, my lungs, every part of me is pure dirt, it's disgusting and should be destroyed by flames.

Die, die die die die die stupid ugly disgusting fat dumb bitch too much not enough you'll never be loved never ever stop trying stop hoping stop holding onto fucking shit people stop stop stop stop
 
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Namelesa

Namelesa

Trapped in this Suffering
Sep 21, 2024
514
I feel relationships with other people has just caused me more pain in the end. I often get too attached to someone and rely on them for my main source of happiness and they often leave me but I don't how to be okay with being alone as I just feel bored and empty on my own. I feel like there's something deeply wrong with me and I am just broken. I wish I could be on my own and not desire human connection but I do and I have to either suffer being alone, having to deal with the pressure and fear of the person not leaving me or deal with the heartbreak of them leaving me. I just feel like no matter what I do I get a negative outcome. I managed to find a friend that hasn't left me yet despite knowing eachother for 2 years but I can't even see him physically anymore cus of both of our parents restrictions which has caused a different kind of pain. I feel like I am going to suffer with the emptiness of being alone no matter what I do.
 
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lawlietsph

lawlietsph

can we be done here
May 6, 2023
208
I feel relationships with other people has just caused me more pain in the end. I often get too attached to someone and rely on them for my main source of happiness and they often leave me but I don't how to be okay with being alone as I just feel bored and empty on my own. I feel like there's something deeply wrong with me and I am just broken. I wish I could be on my own and not desire human connection but I do and I have to either suffer being alone, having to deal with the pressure and fear of the person not leaving me or deal with the heartbreak of them leaving me. I just feel like no matter what I do I get a negative outcome. I managed to find a friend that hasn't left me yet despite knowing eachother for 2 years but I can't even see him physically anymore cus of both of our parents restrictions which has caused a different kind of pain. I feel like I am going to suffer with the emptiness of being alone no matter what I do.
I agree. Everything ends with a heartbreak. I wish I could stop loving and be alone.

And there you go, I just got a nice comment from a random person "tbh I fucking hate you too" :) he just deleted it

what is wrong with people, what the fuck is wrong with them

we are on a suicide forum and I get a comment like this........ I have to die right now
 
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human909

human909

I just want peace
Dec 30, 2024
131
I agree. Everything ends with a heartbreak. I wish I could stop loving and be alone.

And there you go, I just got a nice comment from a random person "tbh I fucking hate you too" :) he just deleted it

what is wrong with people, what the fuck is wrong with them

we are on a suicide forum and I get a comment like this........ I have to die right now
Same, i fucking hate people so much i wish they just let us die, but they don't fucking listen.
 
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lawlietsph

lawlietsph

can we be done here
May 6, 2023
208
Same, i fucking hate people so much i wish they just let us die, but they don't fucking listen.
What goes through a person's mind when he or she makes this awful comment on a suicidal person's thread? Please tell me, why are people so horrible? I don't even know who it was...
But he/she sure made me want to kill myself even more
 
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