Venting I am 100% sure I'm going tò CTB in two or three months

[Breadbfra]

(non fluent english speaker)

I'm a 26F from Italy, and I started suffering from depression in 2013. I was 14. I do not recall having a single happy memory, or maybe two or three. I have Always suffered, and in 2014 I attempted for the First time. I GOT diagnosed with major depression and from then on It has been an endless list of days suffering. I was Always considered a genie, a very clever child but, at the end of the day, I've acomplished nothing due to depression. 7 months ago I got diagnosed with severe ADHD and autism and this made things worse.
I went under ketamine treatments, and was able to live a quite normal Life even being under treatment every 7-8 months.
I opened a bakery but I ended up losing a shit ton of my rich parents' money due to many reasons.
Today, 9th April 2025, 5 years from opening my account in SS, I realized I can't succeed in nothing in my life. If I wasn't rich Born I would have killed myself basically 6 years ago.
But now, I have taken my decision.
I know my parents, my Friends, my dogs will be missing me but I can't do this anymore. I'm Just not made for Life and won't ever be and that's okay.
I just need a method that's going tò be 100% sure and I Will be finally at peace.

 

[FuneralCry]

I also see myself as not meant for this suffering, I hope you find the peace you search for, I wish you the best.

 

[herooftime]

There is a lot of method you can use to CTB, the one everyone use that is 100% sure is SN.
Hope you can find peace.

 

[AmataBlank]

There is a lot of method you can use to CTB, the one everyone use that is 100% sure is SN.
Hope you can find peace.

not everyone can use SN, it's risky buying now (especially what is happening in uk rn), you better chance doing any other methods imo

 

[DontTouchMeImFamous]

not everyone can use SN, it's risky buying now (especially what is happening in uk rn), you better chance doing any other methods imo

what if u don't live in UK? Is it still risky?

 

[AmataBlank]

what if u don't live in UK? Is it still risky?

I think SN is illegal in UK and Canada that's why is risky to buy and get welfare check to your house, like you better off ctb with different drug

 

[DontTouchMeImFamous]

I think SN is illegal in UK and Canada that's why is risky to buy and get welfare check to your house, like you better off ctb with different drug

but I don't live in the UK or Canada or the West, so why would it be risky to me?
Do you have any suggestion for a different drug?

 

[Raven2]

Sorry your feeling this way. Goes to show even money can't buy happiness.