• Hey Guest,

    An update on the OFCOM situation: As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. OFCOM, the UK’s communications regulator, has singled out our community, demanding compliance with their Online Safety Act despite our minimal UK presence. This is a blatant overreach, and they have been sending letters pressuring us to comply with their censorship agenda.

    Our platform is already blocked by many UK ISPs, yet they continue their attempts to stifle free speech. Standing up to this kind of regulatory overreach requires lots of resources to maintain our infrastructure and fight back against these unjust demands. If you value our community and want to support us during this time, we would greatly appreciate any and all donations.

    Read more about the situation here: Click to View Post

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC): 39deg9i6Zp1GdrwyKkqZU6rAbsEspvLBJt
    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9
    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8
suffering

suffering

Too p*ssy to end it, too suicidal to leave
Aug 17, 2018
398
I feel like am impostor here, because I know I don't have the courage to ctb, probably I will never have it, although I tried and I want to.
Anyway I wanted to vent, because I have nobody to talk to. I can barely move around, although I am not sick. I sleep about 12 h per night, because dealing with reality is too much.
Going outside to take out the trash feels like an enormous task for which I barely feel psychologically prepared (and I am an adult who used to have responsibilities). I feel reduced to the mind of a sick child who regrets being born every day of his life.
Anyway I know this is a selfish rant, I add nothing constructive to this forum, but I feel so alone and lost and I needed this. :(
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, anelakapu, TiredHorse and 10 others
Retched

Retched

I see the chaos in your eyes.
Oct 8, 2018
837
With you here, but forced to work so I am in terrifying conversations all day with people who haven't reduced their life to a living shell. It exhausts me because they are so nice and have great lives and do things and I'm here like, ummmmm, what day is it? Why am I still alive.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, anelakapu, TiredHorse and 5 others
H

huggablewinter

Member
Nov 1, 2018
6
I feel like am impostor here, because I know I don't have the courage to ctb, probably I will never have it, although I tried and I want to.
Anyway I wanted to vent, because I have nobody to talk to. I can barely move around, although I am not sick. I sleep about 12 h per night, because dealing with reality is too much.
Going outside to take out the trash feels like an enormous task for which I barely feel psychologically prepared (and I am an adult who used to have responsibilities). I feel reduced to the mind of a sick child who regrets being born every day of his life.
Anyway I know this is a selfish rant, I add nothing constructive to this forum, but I feel so alone and lost and I needed this. :(

I know exactly how this feels. I'm being propped up by pills. I'm sure if I went off them I would only be able to lay in my bed and suffer, too cowardly to do myself in which would be the appropriate thing to do. Reality is too much for me, too. I have to go to work tomorrow which feels like the most enormous task that I'm not at all prepared for.

I'm sure you have your reasons. It is what it is. You're not alone.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, anelakapu, iHeartRockArt and 3 others
Sinbad

Sinbad

Self-Annihilation is loading...95%
Nov 27, 2018
542
but I feel so alone and lost and I needed this. :(
As huggablewinter said, you are not alone. Starting this thread is a great idea to interact with other SS members. Also, feel free to PM anyone you feel comfortable with.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, TiredHorse, LivedTooLong and 4 others
gingerplum

gingerplum

Enlightened
Nov 5, 2018
1,450
I feel like am impostor here, because I know I don't have the courage to ctb, probably I will never have it, although I tried and I want to.
Anyway I wanted to vent, because I have nobody to talk to. I can barely move around, although I am not sick. I sleep about 12 h per night, because dealing with reality is too much.
Going outside to take out the trash feels like an enormous task for which I barely feel psychologically prepared (and I am an adult who used to have responsibilities). I feel reduced to the mind of a sick child who regrets being born every day of his life.
Anyway I know this is a selfish rant, I add nothing constructive to this forum, but I feel so alone and lost and I needed this. :(
I think a lot of us know exactly how you feel. If it weren't for my kids, I wouldn't feel the need to do anything. Even then, there's no fulfillment, just sad, exhausted obligation. I think that I shouldn't kill myself now so they don't associate Christmas with their mother's suicide, but then, how much better is it to have a joyless, hollow-eyed shell of a mother, anyway? My house looks like a junkyard run by meth addicts, and I can't bring myself to care, much less make an effort to clean.

We all wish we had a button to press and wink us out of existence. You are not alone.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, TiredHorse, Fucking loving it and 2 others
Fucking loving it

Fucking loving it

Specialist
Sep 3, 2018
378
I'm holding on by a fucking thread. The only reason I haven't CTB yet is bc of my son. My thoughts seem to get more and more toxic by the day. I feel empty. I try my best but my best is either sleeping or sitting on the couch in front of the tv while I get my disability.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Sinbad and gingerplum

Similar threads

Namelesa
Replies
14
Views
369
Suicide Discussion
Namelesa
Namelesa
L
Replies
6
Views
249
Suicide Discussion
FuneralCry
FuneralCry
letdown
Replies
2
Views
139
Suicide Discussion
locked*n*loaded
locked*n*loaded
B
Replies
1
Views
96
Offtopic
Jadeith
J