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J

JayJay84

New Member
Aug 17, 2025
3
Hi everyone and thank you for accepting me in your community.
I'm new to the forum and I'm really grateful I finally found a place where i can share my thoughts and my story without being judged, warned or blamed.
Well, my life has not been easy so far, but i've always endured because i felt there was still hope and something that could improve in the future. Now I'm done!

A couple of weeks ago i got terrible news, at least for me, because it was something i really desired.
I cannot have babies, i cannot!

I feel this as a punishment from something in the Universe for not wanting a baby in the past and now i deserve this situation. I've always wanted to find LOVE and start a family but i was not blessed, maybe i did not deserve the blessing of finding someone to love, and now it's late! My "love" stories have always been horrible, i spent my best years filling my stomach and brain with antidepressants and anxiolytics.

But i realized something important in the last few days: i do not have to accept all the negative stuff that come unwanted in my life, i do not have to endure anymore, i can decide to give up!
I feel a sensation of release, because there is finally something i can decide on! I'm thinking about the best way to quit, unfortunately in my country it is not easy to get weapons and i really thought it would be for me the best way to go.

And i am really grateful to you all for giving me the possibility to express what i have inside. Thank you guys!
 
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Reactions: Freedombus'25 and darksouls

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