I did not sign for this bullshit...

[noname223]

Why does everyone expect me to keep going? My psyche is a hellhole. I am so so fucking sick of it. I find me and many people in my environment insufferable. The truth is though I am just in a lot of pain and I project my negativity into others. I don't think I can continue this for a long time. I consider to kill myself in April when college starts.

I searched a long time for it but I could not find it. Someone here posted sarcastically. "Yes it gets better for all 8 billion on this planet. It gets better."
I found that hillarious but I could not find the original comment.

Sanctioned Suicide comforted me for such a long time and helped to postpone my suicide. I am so tired.

How much long am I expected to endure this? I am 27. Good age to die I suppose. I had to endure this for a couple more decades. I cannot do that. I am expected to live longer than my parents. Sorry I simply can't. I did not want to die at 27. Because I don't want that people suspcet I wanted to join club 27. But honestly fuck it if people want to associate that with my suicide I don't care.

I don't think that suicide is a good solution. But all my other options are utter and complete horseshit. It is the lesser evil vote.

 

[ScaredOfMachines]

I'm in the same boat as you. I can't find any real sources of happiness that aren't temporary, and any attempt to improve my life generally just makes things worse.

I'm sorry that you're in so much pain, I wish that there was some advice or anything else I could offer to help you. Being very negative is a hard trap to escape once you fall into it, and I've never really seen anyone change their worldview like that. I hope that things start getting better for both of us.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Life is often so unfair. I'm sorry you have to go through this.

 

[noname223]

Life is often so unfair. I'm sorry you have to go through this.

I read you are in a lot of trouble too. I feel very sorry for you. And I appreciate how often you interacted with my posts.

Sending a lot of love and hugs!

 

[Arachno]

I feel the same about suicide too at the moment, I wish I ending my life wasn't the least evil option right now (not sure if I can even call it an option considering I don't have access to any methods) but it's only gonna get worse if I continue going. I'm struggling with my physical health and health anxiety right now.

I'm sorry you are suffering like this :(

 

[attheend13]

Why does everyone expect me to keep going? My psyche is a hellhole. I am so so fucking sick of it. I find me and many people in my environment insufferable. The truth is though I am just in a lot of pain and I project my negativity into others. I don't think I can continue this for a long time. I consider to kill myself in April when college starts.

I searched a long time for it but I could not find it. Someone here posted sarcastically. "Yes it gets better for all 8 billion on this planet. It gets better."
I found that hillarious but I could not find the original comment.

Sanctioned Suicide comforted me for such a long time and helped to postpone my suicide. I am so tired.

How much long am I expected to endure this? I am 27. Good age to die I suppose. I had to endure this for a couple more decades. I cannot do that. I am expected to live longer than my parents. Sorry I simply can't. I did not want to die at 27. Because I don't want that people suspcet I wanted to join club 27. But honestly fuck it if people want to associate that with my suicide I don't care.

I don't think that suicide is a good solution. But all my other options are utter and complete horseshit. It is the lesser evil vote.

Im wondering the same thing. The pain is at a ten on ten every moment I'm awake. I don't sleep without more and more pills and booze. I'm not sure why people get so angry at the thought of suicide. The same people who get angry don't give a damn about you when you live. Live for what? For who? I'm still here because I'm a loser who has nothing to leave her kids and I can't leave them a financial burden. You have a lot of life ahead of you at 27, though you may not want it. At 27 there's hope but I won't play the game of « it will get better » that hurts too deep because it's so hollow I can hear an echo.

 

[noname223]

I just had my appointment with my therapist. I was very uncertain with her but maybe I should try it with her. It was our third session. The last appointment before I have to decide whether she is the right one.

However, I have the feeling fixing my life issues is exponentially more difficult than just to kill myself.

Love issues are more complicated to me than quantum physics.