i dont even want to be high

[Life_and_Death]

while it does offer a relief at times, example yesterday when my hubby mentioned my bday, it started to bother me so i had a couple puffs (microdosed) and then the thoughts i didnt want slowly drifted away "forgotten" (well as forgotten as they could be) but for the most part i really am happier straight. yet still here i am, smoking up.

im trying to not touch it. but whats a puff? i know stupid question. anyway just a stupid vent, nothing more then that

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

I find the odd puff is ok even helpful but then it turns into lots everyday and I slowly relapse into heavy depression and paranoia and thinking the only thing that will help is to smoke more..............

 

[Life_and_Death]

thinking the only thing that will help is to smoke more..............

yeah i know that feeling. at that point youre just running away from it and its only making you worse. (well i do). like a runaway horror rollercoaster

 

[stellabelle]

while it does offer a relief at times, example yesterday when my hubby mentioned my bday, it started to bother me so i had a couple puffs (microdosed) and then the thoughts i didnt want slowly drifted away "forgotten" (well as forgotten as they could be) but for the most part i really am happier straight. yet still here i am, smoking up.

im trying to not touch it. but whats a puff? i know stupid question. anyway just a stupid vent, nothing more then that

Might just be habitual or emotional dependency rather than necessity.

marijuana is also known to have depressant effects. And it's a lot stronger nowadays than it was in the past.

Been there.

it makes me feel uncomfortable sometimes and it's a one hit quit. But in times of great stress it seems like more of it for sedative purposes can be helpful.
Im sure a lot of people have felt that way.