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Gossamer

Gossamer

Todos estamos untados
Sep 1, 2022
35
It's been a while since I last posted. My life has been improving a bit thanks to my boyfriend who was an unconditional support to me. I'm learning to be myself again and to like things, but it's still a mess. While focusing on surviving instead of letting myself rot, I've found that my executive dysfunction from years of alcoholism and severe depression makes me unable to get a job. My degree feels worthless, and I've failed the courses in IT I signed up for because I couldn't keep up. I feel like there's no way to get better, my account is in the reds and I don't think I'll be able to make it in life when I just don't have any valuable skills. Does anyone have tips for this situation? For executive dysfunction, for handling the shame of failure? Anything, really?
 
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timf

Enlightened
Mar 26, 2020
1,204
When I was unemployed I found "making a job of finding a job" worked as I would get up each day and go to the library to check the newspaper for employment listings. Just having a "work" schedule added a lot of stability. Part time work might be an option as well. Sometimes grocery stores are looking for staff to work less than 40 hours to help them maintain complete shifts.

You had mentioned alcoholism. I don't know if you have found AA to be helpful, but there can be a variety of different groups so if you visit different ones, you might find one that can be an encouragement as well.
 
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Gossamer

Gossamer

Todos estamos untados
Sep 1, 2022
35
When I was unemployed I found "making a job of finding a job" worked as I would get up each day and go to the library to check the newspaper for employment listings. Just having a "work" schedule added a lot of stability. Part time work might be an option as well. Sometimes grocery stores are looking for staff to work less than 40 hours to help them maintain complete shifts.

You had mentioned alcoholism. I don't know if you have found AA to be helpful, but there can be a variety of different groups so if you visit different ones, you might find one that can be an encouragement as well.
Thank you. Yes, I've been trying to schedule my day browsing offers and answering, but I'm still scared that I'll fail. No, I haven't tried AA, but I did get help for my drinking and managed sobriety for a long time. Thankfully, my partner is here to check on me and I am in a much less dire situation for now. I'll do ask for professional help if it goes out of hand.
 
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lionetta12

Just a random person
Aug 5, 2022
1,201
Thank you. Yes, I've been trying to schedule my day browsing offers and answering, but I'm still scared that I'll fail. No, I haven't tried AA, but I did get help for my drinking and managed sobriety for a long time. Thankfully, my partner is here to check on me and I am in a much less dire situation for now. I'll do ask for professional help if it goes out of hand.
You mention that your accounts are in the reds and that you are scared of failing, and struggled with the courses you signed up for. Have you contacted your local government/unemployment office about the situation you are in? Did you sign up for social security or anything similar? You'd get some kind of income then at least, even though it's not a whole lot, but should be enough for food and some essential bills. Their workers should also then be able to help you with courses, your resume, and might even assist you with your job search. They could probably also offer some type of job that's easier to get into for you and that's suitable for your needs right now if you are scared of failing and have been without a job long term, to ease your transition back into work life and to build up your confidence. They should definantly be able to accommodate that if you have any mental or physical illness, and being open with them about the struggle with alcohol would make them be more understanding of your current situation also. It might feel shameful and like defeat to ask for this kind of help and to be so open and honest, but it's the best thing in the long run for yourself usually.
 
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