W
wheretfami
Member
- Oct 2, 2023
- 61
I feel like nothing I say has any meaning or validity to others. I just want someone to listen to me, not make assumptions, ask clarifying questions.... just care to hear me, and take my experience seriously. It shows they really do care. I feel so lonely amongst a crowd of friends. People don't respect me or what I have to say, and they never listen when I do try to talk about myself and my issues. I don't know why. It's always been like this. I feel ostracized all the time. And people fucking blame me for how I feel, not the fact that maybe I'm hurt and need a real friend. I Google suicide-related questions just to see the "help is available" pop up and pretend that means someone really cares about me. I'm considering hanging in my closet (if the bar can hold my weight; I'm small but I still worry) and being found. Idk yet, but I know I can't keep doing this. I would love life so much more if someone would just show me how much I matter to them. I've been waiting for too long and I can't keep barely surviving each day, alone.