card1nal
trying to find peace by whatever means possible :)
- Jan 23, 2023
- 72
I honestly wouldn't describe myself as being a people pleaser. When I was a people pleaser, I wasn't necessarily concerned with how I made people feel, it was just knowing how to snake my way out of situations by always doing what others want. I feel like I've done well with healing the people-pleaser in me; I am much better at setting boundaries now, but I still care about others and want what's best for them.
However, I feel like I love too much. I told a friend this not too long ago, and he said he didn't see it as an issue, but I do. I still have some healing to do, obviously, but right now I'm just struggling to accept that I will often love people more than they can love me. And I will love people more than I can ever show. I feel like I am overflowing with love and care, and most people are unwilling to return or even accept it. I willingly accept that I am a sensitive and vulnerable person, and I love that part of myself, but I'm struggling to find a place where I feel like I belong.
I know it comes off as corny when I try to explain it to others, but I don't know how else to convey these feelings. I feel like I intrinsically love every person that crosses my path, and I don't know how to cope with it. My next step in my healing process has been trying to overcome the fear of rejection, and my love for others makes rejection hurt so much. It sucks! It's one of the big reasons I fall back into suicidal ideation! I feel so alone, full of love with few people to give it to, and even fewer to show me the same amount of love.
However, I feel like I love too much. I told a friend this not too long ago, and he said he didn't see it as an issue, but I do. I still have some healing to do, obviously, but right now I'm just struggling to accept that I will often love people more than they can love me. And I will love people more than I can ever show. I feel like I am overflowing with love and care, and most people are unwilling to return or even accept it. I willingly accept that I am a sensitive and vulnerable person, and I love that part of myself, but I'm struggling to find a place where I feel like I belong.
I know it comes off as corny when I try to explain it to others, but I don't know how else to convey these feelings. I feel like I intrinsically love every person that crosses my path, and I don't know how to cope with it. My next step in my healing process has been trying to overcome the fear of rejection, and my love for others makes rejection hurt so much. It sucks! It's one of the big reasons I fall back into suicidal ideation! I feel so alone, full of love with few people to give it to, and even fewer to show me the same amount of love.