As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.
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That's the unfairness of life and one of the main reasons I want to CTB rather than accept my fate of being a failure in this world, despite trying my whole life to atleast have an average life. I used to be bitter as well, but I don't hold any animosity towards the individuals who got to be the luck of the draw. I've accepted that I got the short end of the stick and a raw deal in life. It could have been anyone. It's a relief not to be confined to this world anymore or life itself.
Yes, the natural order of things in this cruel world has made me accept death. It seems a lot of people have children because they want their offspring to do better in life than they did. It's an okay sentiment as long as it's not the only reason they had children and if they're not living through them vicariously like some parents do. It's only natural to want to start a family, but it's good to be perceptive and think about the possible future your kids will have in this world. Unfortunately, there is no way of really lessening the pain for loved ones. They can never know the pain suicidal people have gone through and that the pain dictates where life will take us, in this case the grave. Letting them know that you cared about them, that there is nothing they could have done to prevent this, and that you will now be free of this painful existence is all you can really say. It would be nice if we weren't in a position where we had to hide our intentions to end our lives and pretend and save face in the meantime, along with having to resort to either complicated or painful methods. I envy the people who ended up receiving assisted suicide, getting to die peacefully in a bed with their loved ones by their side who have come to accept their decision. At least we have the peace of mind of knowing that this life will soon be over once we have what we need to CTB.
in any situation it will seem that there is a way out...
I was verbally abused and sexually abused as a child and I started cutting when I was around 11 and became fascinated with suicide. I attempted twice when I was 12. Hanging, and then drinking a bottle of cough syrup with alcohol. for a while I started feeling better but overtime I just went back downhill and I knew I would. Last year I overdosed on sleeping pills, Zoloft, and Latuda. And another time I went to the top of a really big parking garage and climbed on the ledge and almost jumped. Now I'm hearing and seeing things and I think everyone in the world is in a group to try to kill me and I feel like houses are only placed there as watching points for people to look at me. I'm addicted to cutting myself and I'm wanting to stab myself. I have a heart condition that worries me to death and I don't want to be worried anymore. I don't want to be paranoid anymore. I don't want to be sad anymore
This is really bad, we can not help you with that.
I don't really expect anyone to help me I'm just venting on here
Ruined mood on a suicide forum. :P
Well, even though we're on a suicide forum we can still have a laugh here and there.
We've probably been more in touch with our emotions than the average person.
I'm also reaching a place of acceptance about this. I do wish though that more people had an understanding of how much in life is about luck. I think only us unlucky ones really get it. I hate knowing that some people look down on me and blame me for all my problems. Even those who caused most of them (my family). But oh well. My bitterness has eased up a lot because I see a doorway out of this misery. And it feels so much better to not have to struggle anymore. To not have to push through depression and debilitating physical symptoms to make a living and try to "meet someone" and make all these efforts that just aren't going to pay off.
A lot of people believe that we make our own luck and that our problems are our own fault. Unless they've had to live through a lifetime of misfortune, they will never understand. It's liberating in a way to accept death. We didn't get to choose how our lives began, but we can at least choose how they will end.
