deadzombie6
Exhausted
- Oct 15, 2024
- 34
6 years ago when I was like 13 i started liking a boy and he's the only boy i ever loved but he rejected me 3 years ago . Before all this rejection thing he had a girlfriend , that girl was my classmate . When I had a crush on him I saw how he smiled , giggled and blushed at that girl or how he turned back just to catch glances of her . I remember how he smiled when she looked at him , he was really good looking and so was she , she was everything i could never be he chose her over me . She was pretty , thin and beautiful something that I can never be . 2020 feb 14 on valentine's I saw him bringing a rose and choclate and proposing to her in front of my eyes it shattered my heart I've always known i was ugly but this shit killed me . I wish I was pretty I wish I was her I wish God dint make me this ugly . I've moved on yet whenever he messages casually ( once a year or so ) I feel my heart beat I feel my stomach flip i get so many butterflies and idk why . He's the only one I had a crush on still hurts to think that if I was beautiful i would have been his first love and first girlfriend . I'm already 19 and it hurts to know that I will never be anyone's first in anything . I can never be a man's first love and it hurts .