I hate that i might be getting better

[Kyotospade]

I don't deserve to feel like everything is OK, when they obviously aren't. This world is fucked and its dragging me with it. I want to ctb but at the same time I can't leave behind the people I love because I know they would follow after me at this point.

I hate being in the constant cycle of it getting better and then getting worse . It's exhausting and I'm so fucking tired.

 

[femcelloser]

I feel the same way kinda. There's a cold comfort in my depression I kinda depend on. The worst part is I know I'll just revert back to my depression. It's so tiring

 

[loneloser]

I don't want to get better anymore. A few friends reached out to me but I pushed them all away. I think I'm meant to do this :3

 

[Ashes of a Dreamer]

but at the same time I can't leave behind the people I love because I know they would follow after me at this point.

There's no easy way out, and if you let the love you feel for them increases, it'll become more and more difficult to ctb. Hence, in the case you are more than 95% sure you wanna leave this world - 100% is too much rsrsrsrsrs - you have to get some distance, for your and theirs sake.

 

[Well_Its_Time]

I think that we all want to get better. I think it is a good thing. Some of us can't or won't. I am exhausted of living each and every day but that is just me.