I lost the ability for „deep working“

[ctoan]

i have literally a 10 sec attention span

 

[Lra888]

Depression/anxiety does that to me as well. Thoughts chaotic and racing unable to focus.

 

[Schopenhauer]

I can't do my job properly without stimulants. I'd be homeless by now if it weren't for Modafinil...

It's hard to concentrate in a boring task when you keep thinking about death.

 

[ignominia]

Me too, i even stopped going to several classes, i can't focus properly to read, I'm not enable to do anything besides cry

 

[throwaway777]

it's like if i felt that everything around me is so dim, impenetrable and fleeting and whenever i try to touch it , it disappears and it becomes smoke.. am i high? XD

 

[Lra888]

it's like if i felt that everything around me is so dim, impenetrable and fleeting and whenever i try to touch it , it disappears and it becomes smoke.. am i high? XD

Yes. Even if the sun is shining my head is so scrambled by depression/anxiety everything feels grey and unreal on the outside. Surreal wandering through this.

 

[Lra888]

Me too, i even stopped going to several classes, i can't focus properly to read, I'm not enable to do anything besides cry

I've also lost the ability to read sufficiently. By the time I get to the end of a paragraph my mind has drifted to other thoughts and I haven't retained anything.

 

[ignominia]

I've also lost the ability to read sufficiently. By the time I get to the end of a paragraph my mind has drifted to other thoughts and I haven't retained anything.

I just hate that, some months ago I could read a book per week, but now is impossible, right now i have been stock In a book of 235 pages since almost 1 month ago. It's the most frustrating thing

 

[Lra888]

I just hate that, some months ago I could read a book per week, but now is impossible, right now i have been stock In a book of 235 pages since almost 1 month ago. It's the most frustrating thing

Very frustrating - especially as you said - I used to read constantly but have lost the ability. Such a decline. Makes writing coherently a challenge as well.

 

[ignominia]

Such a decline.

I'm sorry for you too.
How do you deal with that?

 

[Lra888]

I'm sorry for you too.
How do you deal with that?

I don't really. Wish I knew what to do.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

This is a pretty horrible mental health complication, I have it too. I reached a point in my depression where I suddenly experienced massive brain fog and no focus or attention span. My memory was also shot. Still having all these issues years later. I just can't seem to get anything together, whether it's major life decisions or basic daily tasks. I always zone out and can't follow conversations, books or movies for shit. I hate it.

 

[millefeui]

With my tendency of losing myself withing my own thoughts, and my inability of properly interacting with strangers, I never really had the ability to work. Never worked more than three months in one place. People didn't want me, and they were right, I was terrible at working. Most works for someone who didn't finish college require loads of socialization, so I was screwed. Nowadays I don't care anymore.

The only thing I do these days is draw. A friend tells me to sell drawings (as in commissioning) but I will probably mess it up and fail to deliver the drawings at the right time, so I don't bother.

 

[Wantingpeace]

Lost ability to work entirely

 

[Schopenhauer]

With my tendency of losing myself withing my own thoughts, and my inability of properly interacting with strangers, I never really had the ability to work. Never worked more than three months in one place. People didn't want me, and they were right, I was terrible at working. Most works for someone who didn't finish college require loads of socialization, so I was screwed. Nowadays I don't care anymore.

The only thing I do these days is draw. A friend tells me to sell drawings (as in commissioning) but I will probably mess it up and fail to deliver the drawings at the right time, so I don't bother.

Thankfully I work at home 3/5 of the time. And my job mostly deals with huge Excel spreadsheets. I outsource the social parts to a few trusted cowerkers. A regular job is hell.

 

[Lra888]

This is a pretty horrible mental health complication, I have it too. I reached a point in my depression where I suddenly experienced massive brain fog and no focus or attention span. My memory was also shot. Still having all these issues years later. I just can't seem to get anything together, whether it's major life decisions or basic daily tasks. I always zone out and can't follow conversations, books or movies for shit. I hate it.

Yeah it fucks up everything. I cannot enjoy watching a movie because my mind drifts. I'm almost embarrassed around people for how distracted I am during social interaction. Like you said - makes life descisions impossible

 

[Duqu]

I can't do anything without my adderall. I was without it for about 2 years and got like, nothing accomplished.

ETA
Even with adderall, I can't make it through a full TV show. I've been meaning to watch the rest of the series (that's out) of one of my favourite book series, "Outlander" by Diana Gabaldon, but I'm on the last episode of season 1 (I think 4 seasons are out now??) and haven't gotten anywhere. I never see movies in the theatre because I can't sit through them. I think the last movie I saw was Star Wars 7 (including DVD's; nope, never saw Solo). And I barely made it through. I want to watch the new Jack Ryan series too (characters based on Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan series) but have only watched the 1st episode.

 

[Final Escape]

I can't do my job properly without stimulants. I'd be homeless by now if it weren't for Modafinil...

It's hard to concentrate in a boring task when you keep thinking about death.

I have felt the exact same without adderall but the side effects became so bad I had to give them up. I'm severely depressed off of them now but it's only been some weeks and I was long term user.

 

[worldexploder]

I have a short attention span too. I do have days were I can be hyperfocused on something if I'm really passionate about it. Often times my depression makes my mind all scattered and cloudy.

 

[Cee]

yeah, I'm barely scraping by in school. Thank god most of my classes are easy A's that dont require much effort, but for my one hard class ive been relying totally on doing test corrections after the fact to hopefully bring my grade up a little. Haven't managed to pass a single test in that class yet.. constantly asleep during the lectures. Its gonna be a long year.

 

[Lra888]

I forget what I'm doing from one moment to the next because my head is so filled with surging thoughts, anxiety and depression. It's like the outer world isn't as tangible as what's going on inside, it's secondary to thought life. Excellent reason to ctb - not able to function properly.

 

[Final Escape]

I have felt the exact same without adderall but the side effects became so bad I had to give them up. I'm severely depressed off of them now but it's only been some weeks and I was long term user.

Update: I went back on my Adderall because I just couldn't tolerate life off of it. I'm goin to focus on trying to eat differently, to possibly reduce side effects. Yea good luck with that right? Lol! I have to start to pre plan and prepare my meals in advance. This could really help I think.

 

[Voldmort]

me too. I dont care about that anymore