futurebuscatcher
Cat Connoisseur
- Sep 15, 2024
- 98
I go to a new school. Start doing shit. I feel good. Honestly my mental health improves despite the extreme stress
But then a small group of my friends make me feel so dumb.
When I talk to them or make stuff for them they suddenly bring up their other friends and what they've given them. I don't think it's malicious, they just lack sorta awareness or whatever it's called. I feel like I've been creating so much and getting nothing back? But at the same time they're busy and didn't ask for it to begin with. If anything I think it would be considered lovebombing
But then with the other friends in the group I feel like I'm often ignored and not replied to as much as the others. Sometimes when they're happy with each other I get jealous or envious?? I don't know man. I'm always so paranoid they're out to get me.
They bring up other things or other people whenever I do something. It kinda makes me not want to show or do anything for them again. I also feel like them being happy gives me meaning or that my happiness depends on them?
I know I'm being unreasonable and petty. I mean hell I'm sometimes annoyed they have other friends they bring up around me.
But it's also my fault for not communicating?
But then I have other friends that don't do this or I don't feel "jealous" of even when they bring up other people or similar things. It's just moodswings and I think I may have a "favorite person" situation
Am I being stupid? I know the paranoia is definitely unreasonable but i also don't know if the rest of these feelings are reasonable at all or if I'm just in my head
Be honest please I think I'm just in my head and salty or being moody from these shitty swings that are ruining my life
But then a small group of my friends make me feel so dumb.
When I talk to them or make stuff for them they suddenly bring up their other friends and what they've given them. I don't think it's malicious, they just lack sorta awareness or whatever it's called. I feel like I've been creating so much and getting nothing back? But at the same time they're busy and didn't ask for it to begin with. If anything I think it would be considered lovebombing
But then with the other friends in the group I feel like I'm often ignored and not replied to as much as the others. Sometimes when they're happy with each other I get jealous or envious?? I don't know man. I'm always so paranoid they're out to get me.
They bring up other things or other people whenever I do something. It kinda makes me not want to show or do anything for them again. I also feel like them being happy gives me meaning or that my happiness depends on them?
I know I'm being unreasonable and petty. I mean hell I'm sometimes annoyed they have other friends they bring up around me.
But it's also my fault for not communicating?
But then I have other friends that don't do this or I don't feel "jealous" of even when they bring up other people or similar things. It's just moodswings and I think I may have a "favorite person" situation
Am I being stupid? I know the paranoia is definitely unreasonable but i also don't know if the rest of these feelings are reasonable at all or if I'm just in my head
Be honest please I think I'm just in my head and salty or being moody from these shitty swings that are ruining my life
