I want to CTB

[tara44]

I want to CTB I've got everything I need but I'm so terrified I'm going to a bad place when I die. I hear voices in my head telling me I'm going to be tortured for eternity.

 

[SVEN]

I believe those voices are false, Tara. We will all die, one day. And if life becomes unendurable all we are doing by ctb is speeding up the process. I'm sorry you find yourself in a position like this and wish you nothing but good.

 

[tara44]

I believe those voices are false, Tara. We will all die, one day. And if life becomes unendurable all we are doing by ctb is speeding up the process. I'm sorry you find yourself in a position like this and wish you nothing but good.

Thank you. Where do you think we go?

 

[SVEN]

It's hard to know, Tara. If you have a religious faith at all then I believe that if ordinary, failing humans like us can understand the sadness, despair and pain which lead to ctb surely an all wise and knowing Creator knows and understands how you feel even better than we can.
If there is nothing, then it'll be just like it was before we were born. Difficult to imagine, but no more "me" and no awareness of anything, because there is no one there to be aware.
Sorry, I'm a bit paranoid and I don't do messaging.

 

[tara44]

It's hard to know, Tara. If you have a religious faith at all then I believe that if ordinary, failing humans like us can understand the sadness, despair and pain which lead to ctb surely an all wise and knowing Creator knows and understands how you feel even better than we can.
If there is nothing, then it'll be just like it was before we were born. Difficult to imagine, but no more "me" and no awareness of anything, because there is no one there to be aware.
Sorry, I'm a bit paranoid and I don't do messaging.

Yes I don't think anyone truly knows hey. I just hope I'm surrounded by love

 

[FuneralCry]

I also just wish to be free from it all, I personally believe the only torture is in existing, I see death as nothing more than an eternal, dreamless sleep where all is gone. But anyway I wish you the best.

 

[tara44]

I also just wish to be free from it all, I personally believe the only torture is in existing, I see death as nothing more than an eternal, dreamless sleep where all is gone. But anyway I wish you the best.

What makes you stay alive if you believe this?

 

[Xanabby]

We've been indoctrinated to think that suicide is bad and that we will be punished for it.
Using your free will to make a decision about your own life is not a sin.
Don't you think you feel guilty because of all this pro life propaganda there's everywhere?

 

[tara44]

We've been indoctrinated to think that suicide is bad and that we will be punished for it.
Using your free will to make a decision about your own life is not a sin.
Don't you think you feel guilty because of all this pro life propaganda there's everywhere?

Agreed. I hope you're right!

We've been indoctrinated to think that suicide is bad and that we will be punished for it.
Using your free will to make a decision about your own life is not a sin.
Don't you think you feel guilty because of all this pro life propaganda there's everywhere?

Fuck the world

 

[Catastrofe]

I want to CTB I've got everything I need but I'm so terrified I'm going to a bad place when I die. I hear voices in my head telling me I'm going to be tortured for eternity.

Dear, I think you are judging yourself very hardly - it is where the voices come from.
If a person is suffering so badly that they want to ctb, there is nothing to judge, there is a lot to be sorry for. Every sort of religion gave so hars judgement over this, but I am sure that only humans can be so cruel one to the other. If there is any king of God, compassion will be his/her/** way.
We are only humans, and sometimes we struggle so much with ourselves and life that we cannot really take it anymore. This is legitimate too. Try to think it through before ctb, try to tell youself that there is nothing wrong in how you are feeling.

 

[Worndown]

Voices often mirror your worst fears.
Many religions say you go to hell if you end your life. Some also say you go to hell if you wear a dress or report abuse (guys) wear pants or vote (women).
A messed up experience.

You are going through torture now. Can it get worse?

 

[tara44]

Dear, I think you are judging yourself very hardly - it is where the voices come from.
If a person is suffering so badly that they want to ctb, there is nothing to judge, there is a lot to be sorry for. Every sort of religion gave so hars judgement over this, but I am sure that only humans can be so cruel one to the other. If there is any king of God, compassion will be his/her/** way.
We are only humans, and sometimes we struggle so much with ourselves and life that we cannot really take it anymore. This is legitimate too. Try to think it through before ctb, try to tell youself that there is nothing wrong in how you are feeling.

Thank you so much

Voices often mirror your worst fears.
Many religions say you go to hell if you end your life. Some also say you go to hell if you wear a dress or report abuse (guys) wear pants or vote (women).
A messed up experience.

You are going through torture now. Can it get worse?

It can't get worse then it is. I just hope it doesn't get worse when I die :( I think I'll do it tomorrow

 

[OptingOutSmiling]

May you find peace in dealing with the voices, sending you love.

 

[tara44]

May you find peace in dealing with the voices, sending you love.

Do you think the voices will come with me when I CTB?

 

[OptingOutSmiling]

Do you think the voices will come with me when I CTB?

I doubt, since they should be gone then too, but I hope that you could quiet them somehow before and be at peace with your decision. Nobody knows what happens after, we can only make decisions based on the present, and only we can decide too what is best for us. Have these voices been with you for some time, or just when you think about ctb?

 

[tara44]

I doubt, since they should be gone then too, but I hope that you could quiet them somehow before and be at peace with your decision. Nobody knows what happens after, we can only make decisions based on the present, and only we can decide too what is best for us. Have these voices been with you for some time, or just when you think about ctb?

They've been with me for over a year. :(

 

[OptingOutSmiling]

They've been with me for over a year. :(

I'm truly sorry that you have to deal with them. I have no experience in this and cannot imagine what you are going through. I do believe that love is stronger than anything and that if your heart is filled with love, I cannot see how you won't be surrounded by love as you hope. Was there something that you think triggered the voices? I wish they would disappear and I wish you only the best

 

[divinemistress36]

I watch ndes on youtube to feel better about death. They may be fake but its still comforting