It goes to show how much we will give up to obtain the comfort or love we so desperately seek. I haven't been in an abusive situation, but I can relate on the level of dismissing my own needs to try to hold onto someone.
I ended that attachment and relationship one day and actually felt self-love afterwards for the first time in many years. It was a huge shock to feel that. I know logic doesn't mean much when you're so deep in the situation you're in. It's really a form of self-harm in ways. If you find a moment of clarity and courage to change things, I think you should run with it. You might be surprised by the results. This may be weird but I feel the urge to tell people here that I love them. I've resisted that urge. I don't know you, but I know suffering, and it makes me love you. Life sucks and some of us choose to make it even worse for unexplainable reasons. We are just trying to feel something I guess.
Yeah this resonates a lot. I am also suffering a broken heart from someone I fell in love with that I shouldn't have, and he treats me awful too. But he's still married is the problem . He said he's trying to divorce his wife.
He kept telling me multiple times he loves me, and I warned him that I fall deeply in love with people to not tell me that. But he kept going and now he said he feels nothing for me and I am now in love with him. It's really painful so that's why I don't know what to tell you. I think about him every day, but he's awful.
I feel like ultimately with your situation, it's probably a mixture of that and the environment you are stuck in, perhaps you can't control what the person you love decides to do with his life, just like I can't control the decisions of the one I love either. But the one thing that is possible with time and patience is leaving your housing situation and finding a space away from your family situation? Which is probably really challenging, but perhaps this deep longing for love is connected with needing self love, and it's hard to do when in a space that doesn't give you that. Forgive me if I'm misreading your situation though, just based on what I've read. Disregard this if it's not good advice.
I am living with my ex boyfriend, and maybe it's hard to let go of the person I love because I am stuck here living with my ex boyfriend who pays my rent. I think this might be the reason I hold on to someone so much even though that person treats me bad. Because I don't like my living situation at all.
