Fragile
Broken
- Jul 7, 2019
- 1,496
My mental health is treatment resistant, there is no cure for my genetic disorder and the pain is becoming unbearable, i have issues with drug addiction, tinnitus is getting worse and i'm also loosing my sight.
So I decided that i will fight for one last year, giving it my all. maybe a miracle will happen and i'll be able to live a bit longer, but i know for a fact that I will CTB before i hit 30 even if everything goes my way.
In the meantime i'll also try to get a very peaceful and reliable method to CTB, this will act as a safety net so I can try everything and still know that there is another way, plus my last dream is to die peacefully.
Starting next month i'll get surgery to treat some health issues, recover and move away from my relatives and then start to distance myself from them, maybe this will reduce their pain once i'm truly gone.
I can't really work so i'll try to get back into art, this was once a dream that my health issues killed, but maybe i'll be able to leave something beautiful behind.
There is so much that I want to accomplish, but my mind just jumps from hope to despair, I'm being realistic with my goals and I'm still a long way from making peace with my reality, but I'm making progress and even if i fail, I'll know that I tried.
Thanks for reading.
So I decided that i will fight for one last year, giving it my all. maybe a miracle will happen and i'll be able to live a bit longer, but i know for a fact that I will CTB before i hit 30 even if everything goes my way.
In the meantime i'll also try to get a very peaceful and reliable method to CTB, this will act as a safety net so I can try everything and still know that there is another way, plus my last dream is to die peacefully.
Starting next month i'll get surgery to treat some health issues, recover and move away from my relatives and then start to distance myself from them, maybe this will reduce their pain once i'm truly gone.
I can't really work so i'll try to get back into art, this was once a dream that my health issues killed, but maybe i'll be able to leave something beautiful behind.
There is so much that I want to accomplish, but my mind just jumps from hope to despair, I'm being realistic with my goals and I'm still a long way from making peace with my reality, but I'm making progress and even if i fail, I'll know that I tried.
Thanks for reading.