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iwantitalltoend

Experienced
Feb 18, 2023
246
I'm worried if I take sn it might not work and I might survive in a worse state than before. This doesn't mean I don't want to take it, I still want to take it and die but I'm paranoid and afraid of the possibility of failing.

Of course the majority of methods have their own risks, nothing is certain, you don't know for certain if the method you chose will work or not, it's all a risk. If I knew for sure the sn will kill me I wouldn't be worried about anything but it's not certain what will happen. I'm not even worried about not taking an antiemetic, I know sn can kill even without one. What worries is me is I don't know if the sn I have is pure enough to kill me or if it's even sn there and not something else.

I have 2 packages of sn from different sources, from DMC and BO, a german company that sells sn from the polish source BM, so actually the sn is from BM but it's sold by a different source. I wanted to get 2 packages as backup in case the first pack I ordered wouldn't arrive to me, eventually both arrived. I didn't open either of them, I keep them in separate drawers just the way they arrived. If I decide to take sn I'll choose which one to take. I heard from people here both sources have pure sn, that's why I chose to buy from them in the first place but still I have these paranoid thoughts of what if it's not sn in there, what if it's not pure enough, what if it won't work and I'll fail. I want to test the purity of both sn although even the results from the tests might not be clear enough, still I'll test them. But I'm still worried of the uncertainty of it, if it will work or not
 
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R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,800
Is there a laboratory of sorts in your area that does testing and show you exactly how much percentage of each element is present in a particular compound? Usually miners use such services to find out what type of mineral or "special rock" they managed to find from their mining job and how much it is worth or who would wanna buy it. It's a bit expensive but I might end up using that when the time comes. I don't think it gets any better than that to ease an anxious mind.
 
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razahcareca27

Member
Apr 5, 2024
90
still I'll test them. But I'm still worried of the uncertainty of it, if it will work or not
I would recommend you to test it, you have the option of aquarium test and the blood one. as well the option that @rozeske suggested.
the fear of it not working is normal. maybe you're finding yourself in a paranoid state, but that's not for me to say. good luck friend
 
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LifeQuitter

LifeQuitter

Experienced
Jul 11, 2024
262
I've seen goodbye threads from people that used both of those sources, one guy even survived taking it twice from the dmc source because someone found them.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
39,131
It's just cruel to me how people even have to worry about that in the first place and cannot just have the option to painlessly die in a guaranteed way with no risks, what I'd fear is suffering way more from trying to die going wrong. But anyway I hope that you find peace eventually.
 
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AmericanMary

AmericanMary

Mage
Apr 30, 2024
599
Regardless of your source, test it. Do as much research as you can. Stand behind your regiment.

No method is guaranteed. People have survived it all.
 
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iwantitalltoend

Experienced
Feb 18, 2023
246
Is there a laboratory of sorts in your area that does testing and show you exactly how much percentage of each element is present in a particular compound? Usually miners use such services to find out what type of mineral or "special rock" they managed to find from their mining job and how much it is worth or who would wanna buy it. It's a bit expensive but I might end up using that when the time comes. I don't think it gets any better than that to ease an anxious mind.
There probably are but I don't know which lab is better, I never went to such a lab to test chemicals or anything like that. I don't know what I would tell them either if I bring them both packages of sn or just one package. I could tell them I use sn for the purposes it's generally used by people other than commiting suicide, but what if they'll ask for more details? I'm not good at chemistry or stuff related to different chemicals or substances, that's why I don't know what I would tell them
I would recommend you to test it, you have the option of aquarium test and the blood one. as well the option that @rozeske suggested.
the fear of it not working is normal. maybe you're finding yourself in a paranoid state, but that's not for me to say. good luck friend
I'll test both sn with aquarium tests, I might do the blood test as well. It's true I'm paranoid
I've seen goodbye threads from people that used both of those sources, one guy even survived taking it twice from the dmc source because someone found them.
Being found and saved shouldn't be a problem, if I take sn I'll take it either when I'm alone at home or somewhere else such as in a hotel or a forest. I'm more worried about the purity of sn, if it's pure enough to kill me
Regardless of your source, test it. Do as much research as you can. Stand behind your regiment.

No method is guaranteed. People have survived it all.
I'll test the sn with aquarium tests and maybe the blood test. I researched and learnt a lot about this method, I wouldn't have chosen this method if I hadn't known anything about it. It's true that no method is guaranteed
 
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frost_

Member
Jun 6, 2024
49
Not to up the complexity unnecessarily, but what about using two methods? Or, preparing SN from both and drinking half from each? These are just ideas, I would still test both first.
 
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opheliaoveragain

opheliaoveragain

Eating Disordered Junkie
Jun 2, 2024
1,400
Test!
 
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