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AspiLynn

New Member
Apr 13, 2023
3
Newbie here. Literally first time using a forum and it is about leaving this hellhole that society glorifies, ain't that amazing?
I am turning 22 this year, and I have Asperger's syndrome, which is pretty much the smart version of autism.

I am not killing myself, yet. I plan on staying around for around one more decade, because my last wish is to become a godlike vocalist, and I want to do that before I leave.

I think a lot, in my spare time. About life, humanity, etc. But for obvious reasons, stating my views in other places would bring chaos. I guess as long as I am around, I will use this as a venting space, to talk about my views about life and death in general.

See me like a lurking Ted Talk speaker, specializing in death related topics.

Let me start with this:

"Death and Life are opposite sides of the same coin."

As members of this forum, surely you have heard shit like "hey, you don't know what life holds for you, have hope!"
It is a guarantee that you have heard this from someone. As long as you have told others that you have suicidal thoughts.
Which is true, it is absolutely possible that life can get better from here.
But think about it, doesn't the same apply to death?

People make up plenty of variations as to what the afterlife is like: purgatories, heaven and hell, 18 layers of hell, all that jazz.
But then, no one can say for sure which one is correct.
In fact, it is completely possible that none of them is correct.
Therefore, we can also say "we don't know what death holds for us."

You might end up in hell, sure, but... what if death is actually better?
What if death can lead to candies, unicorns, 72 virgins, you get the idea.
No one knows for sure.

What I want to say is, basically, whether do you choose to live or die, either way, you are merely betting on an unknown.
The future life is unknown, so is the afterlife.
So why vilify death so much?
Especially, when you know your life sucks right now.

See it like a shitty job, you are afraid to quit, in fear of the possibility of everything becoming worse.
But if you don't quit, the shitty job stays shitty. And the chances of things changing for the better, is minute.
So what if, despite what your boss tells you, the best answer is indeed, to leave the job?
Never try, never know, right?
Again, like I said, either way, it is an unknown.

Quitting, in any cases, can be hard. It is completely understandable.
"But I have already gone so far."
"What if it gets worse?"

The past, the future, doesn't matter.
What do you feel NOW?
Let's face it, if you are here, chances are, you are already in pain.
Not saying you SHOULD quit, I am merely suggesting:

Why not quit?

Living, dying, good or bad, either way, it is 50/50.
And right now, you know you are in the bad side of the 50/50.
What is stopping you from re-rolling the dice?

Because other people tells you not to?
Because there are apparently "so many people who care for you"?

Why do people live in the first place?
Is it because "many people care for them"?
No, it is the other way around.
"They have many other things and/or people that they care about."

Ok, give it the benefit of the doubt, they might actually do give a shit about you.
Do you give a shit about them?
If you do, okay, talk it out, communicate, see where that brings you.
If not, why let others decide what choice you should make?

Just betting on an unknown. Nothing more, nothing less.
Nothing to be glorified, nothing to be vilified.
 
SexyIncél

SexyIncél

🍭my lollipop brings the feminists to my candyshop
Aug 16, 2022
1,482
I am turning 22 this year, and I have Asperger's syndrome, which is pretty much the smart version of autism.
Hahaha you are definitely evidence that this is true!

I like your analysis. It doesn't matter how many people "care" for me. It's about HOW they care. Care is a huge abstraction, what does it mean more concretely? Many carry forms of control. Some varieties seem helpful for others, but empty for me. But trying to mold it to suit me: wonderful

I'm curious about your ambitions to become a vocalist, your mindset and resources you suggest. Ken Tamplin seems a very competent intro, I wonder your thoughts
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,000
I personally just believe that we cease existing after we exit this world, and for me death will always be the preferable choice to existing here, as I see no point to enduring this futile process when we are only destined for nowhere but death anyway. Other people certainly should have no right to interfere in somebody else's decision to die, nobody should be forced to exist in this world where there is unlimited potential for suffering and harm, to me suicide will always seem like the most logical option because of this.
 
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